


The Monster Inside

by Braxia



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M, Gender or Sex Swap
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2018-09-10
Packaged: 2018-11-28 15:32:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 24
Words: 84,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11420934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Braxia/pseuds/Braxia
Summary: I know what I am. I make no excuses. Those five years away turned me into this. Or, maybe, it just showed who I really am. My name is Olivia Queen and I spent five years on an island called Purgatory. This is what happened to me and, most of all, because of me.





	1. Episode 1: Hell Welcomes You

### Episode 1: Hell Welcomes You

For as long as Olivia Queen could remember, she loved the ocean. Any large and natural body of water really. But now, after her father’s ship, The Queen’s Gambit, had sunk and left her to the mercy of the briny water she was beginning to hate it. The near constant swaying and bobbing, just drifting along with no real destination in mind or sight. She was so hungry. So thirsty. But there was only a little water left. She slept in the raft, nestled into her father’s warm embrace where she felt moderately safe. She believed him when he swore that she would be the one to survive, everyone else be damned. But she was so tired. So very tired. She barely registered her father’s words as he held her close. It was just the three of them; her father, a lone crewman, and her. Moving along the unforgiving ice water. 

“There’s not enough for all of us.” He said. She tried to open her eyes. Will herself into wakefulness but to no avail. She tried to tell him to rest, to save his strength but she wasn’t sure her voice came out enough for him to hear.

“You can survive this. Make it home. Make it better. Right my wrongs. But you gotta live through this first.” 

“You hear me Ollie?” he demanded as he shook her. The small jolt rousing her for a just a moment to clearly tell him to rest. He kissed her forehead, like her used to when she was sick or scared when she was little. He untangled his arm from her, but she didn’t pay it much attention. She was so tired. The sound of a gun going off sent her body into overdrive. Scrambling away from the sound, she watched the crewman fall overboard. The ocean swallowing him up as if it was just as hungry as she was. 

“Dad?!” 

The silver metal of her father’s revolver shined in the overcast light. With a sad look and the word survive on his lips, he put the gun barrel to his temple and pulled the trigger. The shot tore through her father’s skull with a resounding crack that was all she could hear. His body fell to the side, limp and lifeless. She crawled over to him, reaching with shaking hands. She wasn’t quite sure what came out of her mouth then. Varying versions of the word no, she supposed. Grief had an uncanny way of turning even the most scholarly into a stuttering mess. She didn’t even try to stop the tears that fell. 

It was so unfair! Her dad didn’t deserve this, regardless of what he claimed. He should live for many more years to come, to die in his warm bed. Safe and sound with his family with him. She knew that crying could deprive her body of much needed water but she didn’t care. She needed her daddy, and he had just left her alone. She didn’t want to lose him yet. Her tiny fingers clenched his shirt in a surprisingly strong grip. Her face buried in his chest, blocking out the view of his blood leaking out of him and pooling in the raft. She fell asleep like that, clutching at him with hope, prayer, that she would wake and this would all be an alcohol induced nightmare. 

She woke again sometime later, it could have been minutes or it could have been hours. It was either the light of the breaking dawn or the gulls overhead. She hoped it was the birds. Birds meant land. She rolled over, delirium making her unsteady. Her clothes catching and soaking up some of her father’s blood. She pulled herself up to rest against the side of the raft, seeing the dawn shine brightly from behind a mountain. She pulled herself further over the side, paddling frantically towards the island before the seas decided to taunt her some more and carry her away from the only means of surviving at the moment. 

As she neared the shore she dug into the water to harshly, sending her sailing over the side of the raft. The life vest kept her head above water but it made swimming a challenge. She dove at the island; the only thing on her mind was getting there. Nothing else mattered right now. Not how much the hunger in her belly twisted up her stomach like a pit of snakes, writing and eating itself. Not how sick she felt from swallowing the salty water as she gasped for breath trying to get out of it. Not the corpse of her father that lay in the raft that was steadily following her. When she finally made it, she pulled herself along on her hand and knees. Her strength gone for the moment. Falling back into the water after stood because she tripped over a fallen tree. Scrambling up and over the rocks that boxed in the tidal pool she found herself in. At the top, she felt to the side. It had taken everything she had just to get this far, she was running on fumes and quickly running out. The gulls trilled by her, turning she saw them swarming the raft where her father remained covered in the tarp. 

“Get away from him!” she screeched and hauled herself up and over to them. Shooing away the birds and thankful beyond measure that they hadn’t desecrated his body. She fell to her knees and held his hand, the jagged rocks biting and latching on like teeth. Finally safe for the moment, without death looming over her, she allowed herself to feel the full weight of her emotions. Barely falling away from the corpse in enough time before her stomach rid itself of who knew what. The acid burned her throat, more so than the salt water. The heaves racked her body, twisting her stomach in unnatural angles. 

_It hurts, daddy. _She thought.__

____

The ravenous gulls came back for a second try and she threw herself across his body, hoping to protect it from the vultures. Hoping they were gone, she gagged at his smell. She had to get him someplace else. Someplace that was safe. She groaned in effort to pull him out of the raft and into a fireman’s hold as he had taught her. Her legs buckled under the strain but by sheer force of will, she kept im on her shoulders and trudged forward. She laid him out on a small cliff facing the shoreline they had arrived on. Finding a small, blank notebook in his pants pocket. She grabbed it, placing it in her own pocket before taking boulder after boulder to cover her father’s remains. As she stood from placing the last rock, a whoosh sounded. She thought it was just the wind moving around the rocks until white hot pain punched the wind out of her. She screamed and fell over, her arm barely keeping her up. Looking down, she saw a stone arrow head poking through her shoulder. She screamed again as she lay down on her father’s grave, catching sight of a figure in the distance with a bow and an arrow that he was getting ready to shoot again. She turned away from the person, hoping to save her father. For the hundredth time, she passed out again. 

She came to again in a cave this time. Her body propped up against rocks that left her back sore. The arrow was still there, she could see by the daylight that streamed in through the gaps in the high ceiling. The figure who shot her walked in, silhouetted by the day light behind him. He wore pants, a shirt, and a hood but no shoes. By his features he was Asian, his shaggy black hair and beard lightly moving with each step. She moved slowly, as if he were afraid of scaring her. She rolled to her side to get a better look at him as he dropped his hood and crouched down beside her.

“Why… Why did you shoot me?” she rasped, throat raw from bile or seawater. He responded in something foreign. He handed her a bowl and a palm full of grass, he motioned both towards her, urging her. She took the herbs and popped them in her mouth, coughing at the taste before gulping down the water. Before she set the coconut bowl down, he grabbed the shaft of the arrow. Pulling it free from her flesh, she could do no more than throw her head back and groan loudly in an “ah ah” fashion. 

She must have passed out from the pain and she was getting real sick of fainting. She woke up with her shoulder sore and throbbing in time with her heart. But it was bandaged and without protrusions that shouldn’t be there. Looking over to see her attacker and rescuer asleep, a small fire offering enough warmth to keep most of the chill at bay. She sat up, wincing when the motion set her pain receptors alight, and staggered out of the cave. With jerky, unsure movements she made her way through the brush. She could barely feel her legs, looking back with quick glances to make sure no one was following her. Tears sprang to her eyes and her vision swam. Everything she was hurt. 

_I need you dad… It hurts… _she thought.__

____

She tripped in the foliage, banging her head and crawling away before regaining her footing enough to run away. It was so bright out here that she could barely see anything. Just blurry shapes of trees with skeletal hands and fingers reaching for her. She stopped to rest against a fallen tree. Unsure of where she was or what direction she was even going in. Her shoulder was bleeding again, pain running through her as her coughing jarred it. Walking forward a few paces, she heard a noise and stopped. Suddenly, she was confined in a net and her feet were off of the ground. Her rescuer/attacker was next to her with a blade pointed at her. She jumped and tried to move away as far as the net allowed. She wondered when he had gotten here. He said something to her and she looked at him, sure that the fear she felt right now was clear on her face. He walked away from her and she was sure he was going to leave her there. Suddenly, the net went crashing down and she hit it with a groan, still he stared at her. He said something else before walking away, leaving her, as she had thought he would, coughing and gasping for her lost air. Her shoulder was bleeding even more now and getting to her feet and staggering away like a drunk was difficult but she managed it. She followed after him because, whatever the man had done, he had saved her. Which meant that he was her best chance at living at least another day. 

Days had passed in much the same manner; her savior would disappear to somewhere, comeback with some bird, and complete the cycle of kill, cook, eat. All the while, Ollie would take out her wallet and stare at the pictures in there. There was one with her group of friends; all linked and wrapped around each other in a silly pose. Sam and Lucas Lance, Tommy Merlyn and herself. She wished she could go back in time to when this picture was taken. Back to happy days where no one died or tried to hurt her. Her savior gave her some of the bird but she suspected it was only because she was still injured. 

When her shoulder was healed enough that she didn’t have to worry about opening it and almost bleeding out again, the cycle continued except now he didn’t give her any. She stared at the picture of her friends, focusing on her boyfriend Lucas. Her savior returned with another bird in a wooden cage which he set down right next to her and spoke a word that she didn’t understand before walking away from her. The bird trilled.

“What… am I supposed to do with that?” she asked and he turned back towards her, saying that word again. 

“Does that mean bird?” he looked at her in frustration and barked the word at her again. Being a disappointment to her parents for years made her well versed in the frustration face. 

“I don’t speak Chinese!” she snarled at him, days without food and slowly losing the hope that she would be back with her friends and family took its toll. The man stalked off, leaver her and the bird alone. She looked back at the picture, breathing a quiet sorry. 

A few days later, she still hadn’t eaten. The man was quickly making the switch back to attacker, pushing her away and denying her food. Always repeating that word. Shēngcún. Every now and again, she would catch him looking at her with an emotion that she registered as pity. She didn’t like it. She didn’t want anyone to look at her like a victim. So she was happy when his pity turned to anger then to something she couldn’t name when she tried to fight him for the food he ate in front of her. She was growing desperate, hitting rock bottom. 

“What is that?” she asked him while he ate, crouched down by the small fire. 

“I’m so hungry.” She rolled to her feet, swaying lightly as her breath came in gasps. She was weak. Weak with hunger. Weak in strength and slowly becoming weak in spirit. When she reached for it, he grabbed her fingers and twisted, she let out a howl before he pushed her away. Her unsteady feet causing her to go ass over tea kettle to the rough stone floor. 

“Okay. Fine. Don’t share.” She said as she rolled back to being upright.

“Hey.” She looked at him. He pointed to the bird that was still in that wooden cage. Holding his fists in the air, one on top of the other, and made a jerking motion. Pulling those calloused hands away from each other. 

“ _Shēngcún. _” She looked back at the bird. Her face draining itself of blood. She wasn’t naive, she knew where the meat on her plate came from. But she never had to do the deed herself.__

____

“I am not going to kill the bird.” She said. She got up and left the cave as steadily as she could manage. 

____

She walk down to the shore line, clutching her side in hopes that maybe the action would keep her empty stomach from eating itself to abate the hunger it felt. She didn’t know how far she walked or for how long but when she made it to the mound of rocks that was her dad’s grave, she dropped to her knees. She didn’t care about the rocks skinning her knees and making them bleed. She hardly even felt it. 

____

_What am I doing here? _She wondered. Her dad would not spontaneously wake up and push the rocks aside with a smile and a cheeseburger. His ghost would not appear before her and offer guidance. But she still found herself talking to him anyway.__

______ _ _

“Daddy, please help me. I don’t know what to do.” Her eyes stung with tears. Blinking rapidly to keep them from falling. 

______ _ _

“I’m so hungry but I can’t do it. I can’t kill another living thing.” Her stomach let out a growl in protest. 

______ _ _

“I don’t want to die.” She sobbed. She was sure the man in the green hood was nearby. He always seemed to be able to find her and quickly. A hand fell on her shoulder; she jumped and looked into the blurry face of the man she stayed with. She sobbed and launched herself at him. Holding on to him as if her life depended on it. Because, well, it did. To her surprise, he didn’t push her away. He held her closely; smoothing her matted blonde hair back and let her cry into his chest. When she calmed enough to trade tears for sniffling he stepped back and walked away. With no other choice, she followed behind him. 

______ _ _

Days later, she still wrestled with killing the bird in that tiny wooden cage. She was so hungry she could do little more than stare at it at first. As always he repeated the word. She begged him for food, he only watched as he strung up plants. 

______ _ _

“Please. I’ve never killed anything before.” But, then, he probably already knew that. She looked at the bird again. This was it. Hello, breaking point. Her hands shook as she lifted the top of the cage and even more as she chased it around. She held it gently, around the wings so it would fly away. It looked so calm. It had no idea that she was not its friend. 

______ _ _

“I’m sorry. So sorry.” She couldn’t look when she did it. That much she was sure of. Looking at the ceiling, she positioned her hands just like he had showed her. Wincing and fighting back tears when she pulled and the little neck snapped like a twig. Her hands shook so badly she dropped it. He stopped his work and watched her, finishing what he was doing before sitting down before her. Cutting the head off and pulling out feathers. He snapped at her in Chinese when she tried to look away. When it was sufficiently cooked, knowing it was because he had done it, she dug into it with reckless abandon. It tasted horrid but it didn’t matter. She had food in her stomach and it felt like she could have eaten ten and not have been full. He sat down across from her, watching as she ate, repeating that god awful word.

______ _ _

“Yeah. Bird. Got it.”

______ _ _

“ _Shēngcún_ not mean bird. _Shēngcún_ mean survive.” That made her stop eating. Not the fact that she choked on it. Nope, not at all.

__

______ _ _

__

___“You speak English?!” she hissed._ _ _

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“You want survive this place? Bird not last thing you kill.” His voice was harsh but his eyes were soft. Those eyes were soft in understanding. Those bottomless black eyes were kind and she felt really bad for assuming he only kept her around to watch her suffer. He took out the picture of Lucas.

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“You need forget him. You look at all day, you not survive this place.” She knew he was most likely right but she didn’t want to own up to it. That picture, all of her pictures, were the only things keeping her in any sense of sane. 

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

The next day, he woke her early and they ate the rest of the bird from the day before. She tried to block out any thoughts about what might have crawled on it during the night. When they were finished, he urged her to follow him. They walked through the forest, her stumbling and him walking as if he hadn’t a care in the world. She could tell by the scowl and harsh set lines of his face that his wasn’t the case. His bow and arrow were at the ready and every so often he would stop. Crouch down to the forest floor and look at something she couldn’t identify before heading off. There was a grey rabbit ahead of them by a few yards, his arrow flew straight and hit it dead on. 

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“Dinner.” He said and motioned for her to retrieve it. Her stomach rolled at the idea. 

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“Here’s an idea. How about I shoot the bow and you pick up the bloody, dead, disgusting animal?” he looked at the rabbit and held the bow out. 

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“What?”

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“Try.” 

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“Breathe, everything breathe. Breathe, aim, fire.” He demonstrated and she took the bow. 

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“Aim that tree.” 

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“Gee, you don’t say?” she snarked as she rolled her eyes. He handed her an arrow which she clumsily notched. She pulled the string as she had seen him do.

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“Breathe.” And she did. She let the arrow fly and it narrowly missed the mark. By a mile. He said something in Chinese.

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“What does that mean?” she sighed.

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“You will die badly.” He said as he took the bow from her. Telling her to get the lost arrow. As she neared it, someone came up behind her and covered her mouth so she couldn’t scream. It was him, her savior. His hands were rough and calloused. These were gloved. The man cuffed her and dragged her with his equally shrouded buddy to a hole in the ground next to a truck and another guy. They were dressed like soldiers. The Special Ops kind that only wore black. One of them opened the hatched over the hole and the one who held her roughly shoved her in. then the closed the hatched and locked it. They had to have done so because no matter how hard she tried she couldn't get it to open. 

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

She screamed at them to not leave her there. Not alone. That she hadn’t done anything. One of the men slammed the butt of his rifles against her hands. She hollered in pain and let go of the bars holding her captive. They left her there. She got quiet, hoping not to draw any attention to herself either from the goon squad or animal looking to snack on an heiress. They came back for her sometime later, dashing her hopes that her savior would find her and free her. They dragged her through the brush, the briars ripping her shirt and tearing up her arms. They brought her to a camp of some kind. More Special Ops guys milling about and doing various things she really didn’t want to think about. They brought her inside a tent, the biggest that she saw and gave her a shove. The momentum causing her to bump into the support beam. The man behind the table was older, not as old as her dad but close. 

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__

“Please. Sit. You’re making me feel rude.” He had blonde hair and an accent that she didn’t not recognize as American. Something about him felt wrong. Very very wrong.

__

_________ _ _ _ _ _

__


	2. Episode 2: The Will of the Father

Olivia panted as she tried to gently set herself down in the chair. Her brain was firing off all kinds of warning bells at this man. Who did nothing but pop open a can and apologize for the way she was treated. Oh god, is that soda?! He poured the contents of the can into a glass with… fuck a duck, he even has ice!

“They’re trained to view any strangers as hostile.” He looked at her with half lidded blue-grey eyes but she felt as if he were looking through her. Searching and probing. 

“I’m Edward Fyers, by the way. And you are?” 

“I’m Olivia Queen.” She said without looking him in the eye. 

_Please… find me soon… _she thought.__

“I was… shipwrecked here… I don’t know… for how long…” if there was anything her parents had taught her, it was that if you wanted to hide something you don’t outright lie about it. You stick as close to the truth as possible. That way your face wouldn’t tell someone you were lying and you wouldn’t have to remember what lie you told to whom. For once, she was mildly thankful for her party girl days. The man, Fyers, looked like he was in charge and that meant he made the decisions. She prayed for a miracle that this would work.

“My family has money. Lots of money.” That made his eyes widen.

“You would be… really well compensated for my rescue.”

__“Well, I look forward to that. But for the moment, let’s just talk.” His face remained neutral. She was telling the truth, he had to know that. But he didn’t seem interested._ _

__“About what?” he picked up a photo from behind him and showed it to her._ _

__“Do you know this man?” he asked and she studied the photo. The man wore something like a military uniform. Asian descent. She hadn’t recognized him at first but the eyes gave it away. Those dark, soft eyes that looked out for her. Helped her. Saved her. She tried to keep recognition from her face._ _

__“No.”_ _

__“No?” she shook her head and asked who the man was._ _

__“You’re a poor liar.” She said nothing. Fyers crossed his arms and leaned back in his seat._ _

__“I have been polite. I’ll offer you one more chance before my manners leave me.” She couldn’t say anything. He had saved her when he could have let her die. Was teaching her how to survive. This was the very least she could do to repay him._ _

__“Hey. Hey. I-I don’t know this guy. I-I thought I was on this island all by myself.”_ _

__“Do you know what this island is named?” she just looked at him, confusion dancing across her face._ _

__“We’re on Lian Yu. Mandarin for purgatory.” He got up from his seat and put their faces together. She leaned back, trying to get away from his hard stare._ _

__“But I can make it feel like hell.” He growled lowly. A spark of fear caused her spine to tremble. He got up and walked around the table towards the tent flap._ _

__“I don’t know why you’re protecting him. You’re young and foolish.”_ _

__“Perhaps you don’t know why either.” Fear caused her breathe to come in short pants._ _

__“Think on that while you beg for death.” He left her then. Punching his way out of the tent as he called to one of his men that she was his now. She turned, waiting with a morbid curiosity what sort of monster would walk in. And a monster it was. The man was dressed like the soldiers outside except he had what looked to be a sword strapped to his back and a mask that was half black and half yellow. She could barely see his eyes._ _

_I am so sorry daddy… I am going to die here… _she thought.__

____

He grabbed her and hauled her up from the chair. She fought his hold but it appeared as if to him she was little more than a fly. He lifted her cuffed hand above her head and attached them to the support beam of the tent. Fyers came back in; turning the chair she used around to watch. Yellow Mask took a knife from his belt, sinking it in slowly into her abdomen. Above her naval where her ribs met and to the side a bit. She screamed as he sunk it in to the hilt and gave it a twist for good measure. Then he pulled it free, slower than when he put it in. Her chest heaved with effort to keep her jaw locked tight. But the movements caused the cut to widen. Yellow Mask then cut her over her left breast. Fyers, or Sicko as she called him in her head, commended her. He was impressed by her resolve. But really, that only made things worse for her. He told Yellow Mask to put her out of her misery and walked away. Washing his hands of her like it was nothing. The pain buzzed around in her skull. On the verge of passing out again. Passing out she could live with, but she didn’t want him to see her cry. She really didn’t want to give him that but as he approached she found her resolve breaking. Fyers was thrown into a crate with another man’s unconscious body. Yellow Mask whirled around to face the attacker. In came her savior in a green hood, a well-placed arrow cut the rope that kept her upright and her body hit the floor with a dull thud. The sand in the wounds made her hiss. She pushed herself to roll. Watching as her savior and Yellow Mask fought. Trading blows back and forth like they were playing tennis. Her savior dodged and countered with strong hits from his bow as if he had years of practice. Yellow Mask grabbed him and rolled, her savior rolling with and tossing Yellow Mask aside.Yellow Mask lunged with his knife first, seeking her savior’s flesh. They traded blows again, her savior kept the knife away from him. With a hit to the back of Yellow Masks head, her savior dropped to her side and half carried and half walked her out of the tent and back to their cave. He laid her down gently, something she was not used to with him. He was talking to her but she didn’t really hear him. Only the dull roar of her heart beat in her ears and the pain making her thoughts cloudy. She didn’t doubt he was scolding her. She bit her tongue to keep the whimpers and moans inside. 

"S-Sorry… dad… do better… next time…” yeah she was delicious. No, that wasn’t the right word. Close enough, she knew what she was trying to think of. He gave her a leather pouch, probably medicine of some kind. 

“You stay. I lead them away.” He moved to leave the cave. She stumbled after him.

“Wait! Don’t go! Please don’t leave me!” she shouted after him. If he heard her he didn’t show it. A sound like a string being cut echoed and a large boulder dropped in front of the mouth of the cave. Sealing her inside. She dropped to her knees and pounded on the boulder. Not caring one iota about how the movement was agitating her wounds or how badly she was bleeding. 

“Please don’t leave me dad.” She sobbed. Yeah, she could blame what she was saying on the pain induced delirium. But she knew better than that. That man, who she didn’t even know the name of, had become a second father to her. And while he had a good reason for doing it, he was abandoning her. She wasn’t sure how long she cried, only that it was a long while and when she was done she could feel how puffy her eyes were.

____She started a fire, just as he taught her too. There was little wood around and she wasn’t getting out of here anytime soon unless she suddenly developed super human strength. Using the pages of her dad’s empty notebook to keep it going. She shivered even though the fire was warm, sweat on her brow trickled down her neck. As she used yet another page to keep the fire going, hoping to sweat the fever out, she felt a hand on her shoulder. She whirled around, hoping it was him only to see her father standing there. Her very dead father._ _ _ _

____“Dad?” shock and disbelief coursed through her. She scrambled to her feet, wondering if this was real or a dream._ _ _ _

____“You… You died.”_ _ _ _

____“I asked you! I begged you to survive!” he hissed at her. She had never seen her father this angry before and it scared her. He moved forward as he reached behind him and handed her the revolver._ _ _ _

____“Still one bullet left.” She stared at for a second then took it in her hands. She had betrayed Lucas. Gotten Sam killed even if it was due to Mother Nature. Watched her father commit suicide on the hope that she would survive. And her new father figure… yeah, she didn’t want to go there but the point was she was tired. So very tired with everything._ _ _ _

____“Ollie, my death is made meaningless by yours.” And then he let go. She could feel the cool metal, made her shiver. The weight felt real. If it was, what would be the harm? Really? What was waiting for her outside this cave? But her dad looked so lost. Lost and hurt. Just like her. She stared at him for a while._ _ _ _

____“I’m starving, daddy. I’m going to die anyway… and I want it to be quick.” Her voice was breaking. Or maybe that was the sound of her spirit breaking._ _ _ _

____“I want it to be quick like yours was.” In response, her father or the ghost of repeated the words he said before he died._ _ _ _

____“I can’t. I can’t daddy. I’m not as strong as you.” She was out of tears by now. And she didn’t know if that was a good thing or just the tip of the ice burg. She put the gun to her temple, the same as he had done, and pulled the trigger. It clicked but there was no end for her, no deafening crack of a shot. She threw the gun away in anger. Angry with herself for trying to die and angry for not trying hard enough._ _ _ _

____“Of course it doesn’t work. I’m fucking hallucinating!” she spat._ _ _ _

____“If you weren’t? I died so you could live and you’d have thrown that gift away. You betrayed me, Ollie.”_ _ _ _

____“I’m not strong like you. I never was.” That was a harsh truth to admit. Harder still was the truth that if she were left alone here she’d have died._ _ _ _

____“Then make yourself strong. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the kind of man I was. What I was about to do.” He put his hands on her shoulders. The familiar weight there._ _ _ _

____“I just hope you know… how much I love you, Ollie.” With that one sentence, she felt better. Stronger. Like everything was going to be okay. She will get out of here, but first, she needed to get better. Beat this fever then beat herself against that boulder until it broke or she did. Either way, she wasn’t going to let her father down again._ _ _ _

_“Shēngcún”_ she whispered. 

____She ran out of food just a handful of days later. Water too. Her fever broke eventually and she hadn’t had anymore visits from ghosts. She didn’t know how many pages she had ripped free just to keep the fire going. She battled infection she sure as hell wasn’t going to die of hypothermia. She tore a fresh page and was about to drop it to the fire, feeling the heat of the tiny flames against her hand. Writing appeared on the torn page. Scrawling letters in her father’s hand in red ink that bloomed on the page as it absorbed the heat. The letters spelled out a list of names but she didn’t have time to ponder the significance of it before the boulder blocking her exit exploded. She ducked her head to try and keep it safe from flying debris. When the dust settled in walked her hero. She was happy to see him. It meant he was alive and that he hadn’t abandoned her at all. He set down a container of water and walked back out. She shouted at him that she could have died from lack of food and water. Granted she greedily dug into the water anyway but she wanted to feel a little better by shouting at him. So imagine her surprise and glee when he dropped one Edward Fyers right in front of her. A black and white feathered arrow protruding from his leg. With a war cry she slugged him hard, with such force that it sent both of them to the floor. Thankfully she was already sitting on it so it wasn’t a long fall. She launched herself back at him, fully intent on pounding his face in for what he had done to her. Her savior stopped her, pulling the two apart as if they were two unruly dogs going at it._ _ _ _

____“He tortured me to find you! He was gonna kill me if you hadn’t shown up!”_ _ _ _

____“Then you kill him?” he asked her and handed her a blade not unlike the one Fyers had Yellow Mask stick her with. That stopped her cold. Yes, Fyers would have killed her. But he didn’t. He was in front of her with an arrow in his leg. A bird was one thing but Fyers was human, a weak and defenseless human._ _ _ _

____“Or he can take you home.” That made her stop, looking back and forth between the two men with her._ _ _ _

____“What?” All of the gears in her brain grinding to a halt as if someone had thrown a wrench into them. This was a good thing, she knew that. She could go home. Be with her friends again. Her family. So why did she feel so conflicted about this? Her brain coughed up a piece of a seminar she took in college. The only one she actually passed. The professor had said that while in captivity, the human psyche will make new pathways. Giving the person the best chance of survival, these new pathways would make things that would normally seem reprehensible normal. Her savior was her best chance at survival. Her father had just died and this man had saved her when it would have been easier to just leave her to die. She looked at him like her father because her mind had seen that he had fulfilled the basic needs for parenting. Protection, provision, and love. It had only been a few days but there had to be some form of love between them or he’d have left her to rot. Her mind said that this man was safe. He was family. So then, her brain decided that this cave was home._ _ _ _

_I don’t want to leave._ She thought. 

______“He has a plane. A way for you off this island.” His voice remained steady, but positioned the way he was, where Fyers couldn’t see him, his face showed emotion. He had hope. Not for himself but for her. With Fyers bound and with a very sharp arrow stuck in his knee, her savior left him and crouched down before her. Completely shielding her body from his eyes. He lifted her shirt to see the wound on her abdomen. The wound was closed for the most part; he wouldn’t have to worry about it coming open and bleeding. Same with the cut on her chest but both would scar noticeably. After she was fed and watered to his satisfaction, he grabbed Fyers and forced him to stand. Handing her the knife he had offered her earlier. She took it and walked a half step behind Fyers as the moved through the brush, the knife pointed at his side. Fyers kept talking._ _ _ _ _ _

______“You’re a good person. I can see it.” She mused silently that he walked pretty well for a guy with a leg wound._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Well, beneath the privileged upbringing and wealthy vainer.” She assumed he liked the sound of his own voice._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I could see it when my man tortured you. You wouldn’t give up your friend.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Well, not even a friend really. Someone you just met.” She wanted to growl at him. He was more than a friend, damn it._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Shut up.” She hissed lowly. She should have kept her mouth shut because now Fyers had a wicked gleam in his eyes._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Oh? Not just a friend, is he? A lover, perhaps?” he laughed and she shivered in revulsion._ _ _ _ _ _

______“No, not a lover. But close.” She growled at him to shut up._ _ _ _ _ _

______“A father, isn’t it? My, how cute.” He laughed._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Tell me, my dear. What do you know about him?” she wanted to punch him again but her injured shoulder kept the arm against her stomach to keep it from hurting and the other held a knife._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Nothing, I suspect. Do you even know what this island really is?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Up until eight years ago, the Chinese military operated this island as a prison. For those who were deemed too dangerous for incarceration on the mainland.” Her mind shook off his words. It had to be a mistake. He was shipwrecked here or here by mistake. He couldn’t be dangerous. Dangerous people don’t help out terrified little girls or let them cry on them. Fyers kept talking. Telling her how it was the job of his team to wipe out the inmates of the island after the Chinese shut down the program. Her anger rekindled as he told her that the only two left to be dealt with were Yao Fei, her father figure, and the man who had tortured her. Even if she had known where to find him, that didn’t mean he had to immediately resort to torture. At the memory of those painful cuts he had inflicted, she gripped the shirt she wore closer to her body. It was a plain button up that Sam had let her borrow while they were on the ship. She forced him to keep walking even as her mind wrestled with his words._ _ _ _ _ _

______“What would you do to find a man who slaughtered dozens of people?” they walked for a few more hours. Yao Fei stopping them as he held a radio out to Fyers, telling him to call the plane. Fyers laughed, taunting them. Asking if Yao Fei had really thought it was that convenient that he had been captured. Yao Fei dropped the radio as Yellow Mask stepped out from behind a nearby tree. She couldn’t help the panic that locked her legs at the thought of being at his mercy, or lack thereof, again._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Run!” Yao Fei shouted._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Run!” he barked again when she didn’t start moving. So she bolted in the opposite direction of Fyers, his men, and Yao Fei. Her grip on the knife was so hard her knuckles were white. She didn’t want to leave him but what choice did she have? She wasn’t a fighter or a hunter. She could barely survive out here on her own. She would have just gotten in the way. She skidded across the leaves, resting between two trees to turn back and look for Yao Fei. She turned in enough time to see her father figure on his knees before Yellow Mask, who delivered a vicious back hand. Two of Fyers goon scooped him up and drug him off, leaving her alone in the forest._ _ _ _ _ _

______She was in shock. Couldn’t think, could barely breathe. She wandered off. Her feet carrying her from that spot further in the opposite direction the goons took. When she finally stopped, her shock leaving her, her legs went out from underneath her. She didn’t even register the twigs digging into her palms. She shivered._ _ _ _ _ _

_It’s cold… I need a fire… _she thought.__

________She had seen Yao Fei start fires dozens of times but doing so was actually more work than he had made it seem like. It was misty and everything was damp, condensation falling from the trees like rain. She could barely get her stick pile to smoke. Perseverance or desperation won out and a small fire lit up which she hastily added more twigs to. She drew her knees to her chest, drinking in the small warmth. Looking around at every small noise. Hoping she wasn’t about to be killed. Playing it safe, she quickly covered the fire in dirt and leaves and ran. She heard twigs snapping then a click and a moment of static._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I have contact. Two clicks south-west.” She hid behind a tree much wider around than she was so she was well hidden. At least, she hoped she was. The knife in her hand was shaking from the force of her grip. She prayed he wouldn’t find her. If he did, it was game over for her. She didn’t want to die. Fear held her still, stole her breath. No, this wasn’t fear. This was terror. She looked down at the knife. The thought of not wanting to die yet pinging around her skull until it was a roar. She inched around the tree, seeing his back to her. She moved quick and clumsy. Thrusting the knife at him. He easily caught her, using one hand to hold the wrist with the knife and the other wrapped around her throat. His hand was large. Fingertips nearly touching on the back of her neck._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The hand that held her wrist moved and a sickening crack came out of the appendage. Agony blinded her and she dropped the knife. She pushed against him, the wet and uneven ground causing him to fall down the hill. His grip was steel and he brought her with him. They tumbled down, rolling over each other. Briars, twigs, and rocks cut up her shirt and skin. The sting making her gasp and she caught a mouthful of dirt. They rolled once more with the goon beneath her, his back slamming into a rock and she went face first into a deep river. She gulped in oxygen as she resurfaced. She scrambled to a rock on the opposite bank and looked back over at the man. He was still on his back, eyes open and looking up to the sky but he wasn’t moving. Wasn’t breathing. This was not the first life she had taken but it was the first human life. She hadn’t tried to talk him into letting her go. She attacked him first. She had killed him. Her body bowed as she retched and her stomach issued evac orders. She killed him. She killed him. Oh god, she killed him! She mind railed at her. Telling her this was not the time to have a moral crisis. She could freak out later; right now she had to get out of the area. She got up onto the same bank as him, grabbing his ankles to drag him away. She stripped him bare. Leaving him in his underwear and quickly put on his clothes. They were still warm from his body heat and she was grateful to be warm. She struggled under the weight of all his gear, the boots were too big but she made them fit by bunching up her socks and putting them in the boots to fill in the empty space._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________She covered him with vines and branches and leaves, staring at his uncovered face. A wave of nausea threatened her again and she quickly swallowed before throwing the handful of leaves there. She turned and left, her wrist now screaming. In one pocket was a ring of keys and a map in the other. The words were in Chinese but it was a map of the island. She couldn’t begin to understand how to use the damn thing but it was a start. Putting it back in her pocket, she put her hair up so that it was completely hidden in the ski mask. A dead man’s ski mask. The rifle still might work. With her hair hidden, the mask flipped up so that it wasn’t covering her face, and the gun in her hands she started her unsteady gait in a direction she hoped would get her to safety._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	3. Episode3: Fight to Survive

She walked until dusk without much of a clue as to where she was or how far she was from the body. Contrary to what her father figure thought, she didn’t spend all day looking at photos. She also watched him and what he did. One thing that was always constant was that no matter what time he left the cave, he always came back at dusk and never left the cave after nightfall. She looked around, seeing open space and trees and foliage. She was getting real sick and tired of the sight. Open space wasn’t safe. Yao slept in a cave and people were hunting him. Now they were hunting her for whatever reason but there was no cave here. She spied a log to her left with a gaping hole in the side. Crouching down, she noticed it was hollow and wide enough that she could get in and out of it easily. Looking around and finding nothing better, only worse, she huffed and crawled in gun barrel first. Once she was sure she was far enough in that no one would see her without looking into the log she settled into sleep. 

She woke up several times that night, gasping for air and heart hammering in her ribcage. The nightmare was generally the same. The corpse of the man she killed was reaching for her. Clawing at her. Every time she was able to fall asleep the nightmare would begin again. Each time, the corpse would be more and more decayed until bits of flesh would simply fall from his bones. She was still tired come daybreak but she couldn’t stay there for much longer. It didn’t feel safe enough to do so. She crawled back out of the log and, gun in hand, walked off in the same direction she had been heading in the day before. It was cold this morning, the sweater and pants keeping a majority of the chill at bay. The mist was so thick she could barely see ten feet in front of her. She had to keep moving regardless of her aches and pains. Staying put was only an option if you were somewhere safe and out in the open was clearly not.  
After several hours and very sore legs, she heard voices shouting. Her heart rate went double time as she flattened herself against a tree and drew the rest of the ski mask down over her face. For once she was thankful for her tall stature that she would be able to blend in with the men long enough to get Yao Fei out. At least, that was the plan. She walked into the encampment, the long trek making her used to the too-big shoes. She acted like it was just another day, if she acted any different then the goons would know something was up. She walked up to the dinner line, hesitating. Eating would require her to pull up the mask and expose her. 

“Different day, same slop.” A man said after speaking in Chinese. 

“You new?” he asked. She deepened her voice and squeaked out an affirmative. 

“Don’t worry. Took me a year to find my way around.” The man laughed good naturedly.

“Hey, wait. I’m supposed to be transporting a prisoner. Some Chinese guy in a green hood?” she kept her voice even and deep, confident in her acting ability. 

“Sounds like the guy they got in the East Camp. Come on. You can ride with me.” He said after thinking for a moment. She silently sighed in relief. Less than five minutes and she isn’t dead or dismembered and she is on her way to her father. She walked with the guy, whom she dubbed Nice-Guy, to an ATV. Getting in, a deep voice sounded out. Barking orders and getting in behind the driver’s side. It was Fyers, leaning heavily on a cane. Really God? You can’t give me this one win?! As she, Fyers, and Nice-Guy drove through the forest he began to ask her questions. Praying that her answers were correct enough not to warrant his suspicion. 

“Were you stationed by the perimeter?” 

“Yes, sir.” The din of the engine loud enough to mask the femininity in her voice. 

“And your report?” 

“Uh… everything is good, sir. No trouble.” Silently begging him to stop talking. 

“How long have you been stationed here?” now she was sure she’d be found out. Yao said he had a plane. Told him to call for it so that meant it wasn’t always here and she had no way of knowing when the last time it was here. 

“Uh, just arrived sir.” Vague was good. Just arrived could mean today or yesterday or a handful ago. 

“Yes. You do seem a little green.” Please stop talking! She was beginning to panic.

“Though, I don’t recall a submarine bringing in any new troops.” Now there was a submarine?! 

“Didn’t know about a sub. Thought everyone came in on the plane, sir.” Please be the right answer. Please be the right answer.

“Indeed, they do.” 

Sweet baby Jesus, there is hope for her yet! And her mother said acting class was stupid. They reach the East Camp a ways after nightfall. Quelling her panic as the rest of the ride was quiet save for the sound of the engine. They passed by a pavilion of sorts, small cages made of bamboo set off of the ground by a yard or so. There were people inside them, looking haggard and worn out. She looked for her father but didn’t see him. 

“See, this is where we put those prone to running off.” She was aware that Fyers was coming up behind her. 

“After I’ve finished with them.” He was right behind her. She turned to face him and he bashed the side of her face with his cane. She wasn’t even aware of the ground rushing up to embrace her. He knelt by her, the goons had their guns pointed at her. He lifted her mask and she felt the blood leak from her mouth. Her sight of his face was blurry. 

“Prisoners like you, Miss Queen.” It seems that God was working overtime to kill her. They put her in one of the cages that turned out to be metal with her fractured wrist cuffed to a bar. Her blonde hair was matted with leaves and twigs. Someone banged on the bars near her head and she turned to look and see the face of her tormentor. It was Fyers and another guy. It could have been Nice-Guy but she wasn’t sure. 

“Do you know why my men wear balaclavas, Miss Queen?” 

“Because it masks everything but their eyes. And when you look into the eyes, Miss Queen, you see the truth.” He said when she didn’t respond. Her ears were still ringing from that hit with his cane. 

“You risked everything to save your father. Someone I warned you about.” He sighed.

“Yet you trusted him anyway. And that trust was misplaced.” She looked over to the guy with Fyers as he took off his mask. Showing her the face of her father, the stone cold face of Yao Fei. She clenched her jaw shut, refusing to cry in front of Fyers. In front of him. Had he betrayed her? Had Fyers been right about him? She shivered, burrowing into the sweater. Fyers walked off and left them alone. 

“Working for them now?” her voice came out steadier than she felt. He simply looked at her, he didn’t break his gaze. 

“Why do this to me? Why?” that was the question, wasn’t it? The one she always came back to. He grabbed the bars separating them, tapping his fingers rhythmically. Thirteen taps. Twenty-five taps. Pause. Four taps, one tap, twenty-one taps, seven taps then eight, twenty then five then eighteen. Finally, nineteen taps. She understood that Morse code was a series of dots and dashes, but she didn’t know Morse code. He had to know that. The taps stopped for a beat, a very specific number. Those numbers corresponded to a letter. She did the math and understood what he was trying to tell her.

 _My daughters._ So he hadn’t abandoned her. Hadn’t saved her by telling her to run just to hand her over to Fyers men. He was doing the best he could. 

“Please… let me go…” the tapping started up again. A different message this time.

“No.” 

_I am so sorry, sweet girl._ He walked away from her but now she understood. Fyers had to have one or more of his blooded daughters, otherwise he would have died trying to escape. Which meant that he couldn’t help her without putting them in danger. She didn’t think he wanted anyone to know he told her anything so she let her anger flow. Anger at her situation, her weakness, the death that seemed to blanket her. 

“Don’t you walk away from me! I came back for you!” she screamed at him. He paused for a brief moment before continuing to walk away. 

The next few days blended together. Hearing the cat calls from Fyers men, Yao Fei bringing her what food and water he could. And always he would tap the bars in a message for her. They did a very good job at convincing Fyers that there was no love lost between them. They even kept up the act when some of the men had come to her cage and taunted her. Telling her in very explicit detail what they would do to her if given the chance. She lived for those few moments when he was near her. The messages he left her. Most of the time it was in the form of an apology.

 _I am sorry, my sweet girl._ It gave her hope because it told her that he had felt the same as she did. He was her father, surrogate or not, and she was his daughter to love and protect as best he could. Still, she knew that if Fyers ever gave him the ultimatum of her or his blooded daughters he would choose them over her and she was fine with that. She didn’t want to die. But what was there for them to do? They were out of options and her time in the cage gave her ample time to come to terms with her impending fate. 

On the fifth night, her father took her from her cage. Her legs refusing her weight after being locked in that tight space for so long. He picked her up by the collar of the shirt, waking close behind her so that he could help support her weight. She talked to him. Asking where he was taking her, growling and snarling at him. She felt fear tingle along her spine. Perhaps this was it. Tonight she would meet her death. She only hoped she had made her father, both of them, proud. He brought her to a ring made out of the goons that was lit by barrels on fire. There were two men in the center, Yellow Mask and one she did not recognize. They were fighting. Or, rather, Yellow Mask was fighting and his opponent was getting beaten to death. She gulped. Her father’s grip on her collar remained steady, keeping her upright even when her legs wobbled at the brutality. The man she didn’t recognize was wearing the same clothes as she had seen on the other prisoners. Yellow Mask put his opponent in some kind of arm bar, the men around deafened her with their cheers. Yellow Mask lifted him up and brought him back down, his sword slicing something vital as the opponent hit the ground and didn’t move after that. 

“Well, I admit that bout was particularly one sided.” The men around her gave a holler of excitement as two of them drug the body of the man away. She stared after him. What was wrong with these people?! That man might be dead and they were cheering. 

“Anyone else want to try?” her father pushed her forward. Tapping that same message against her back. Fyers, windbag that he is, explained that the death matches were to bolster unit cohesion. She wanted to vomit. If she did, she swallowed it down. She eyed Yellow Mask; she straightened her spine and looked him in the eye. She was afraid, terrified even, but she would go out fighting. If she was to die, she was going to use every ounce of strength in her body to take him down with her. At least, with her death, Fyers would have one less hold over her father. Except, her opponent was not to be Yellow Mask. Her father disarmed himself and stepped into the ring of bodies. 

They faced each other and she began to lose her resolve. Yao Fei loved her like a daughter and she was sure it would kill a part of him to hurt her. His face was unreadable but what Fyers said was true. His eyes told her everything. He wanted to hesitate but couldn’t. Wanted to pull his punches but couldn’t. The men gave a shout as he struck first, catching her in the mouth with his fist. She hit the ground with a thud, tongue against her teeth some of them wobbled. He circled her as she got to her feet. The moment she was sort of steady, he delivered a kick to her chest. Her breath left her in a rush and she fought not to fall over again. She reached out, trying to steady herself and to just feel his reassurance.  
He shoved her hand away and gave another solid punch to her face. Her neck cracked from the force of her head whipping to the side. He landed a blow to her sides with a kick, her ribs on either side cracking from the contact with his shins. She was on her knees and one more punch put her face first in the dirt. She got up again, fighting to regain her equilibrium. He grabbed her from behind, swinging himself around to catch her in a choke hold. She had no hope of escape, he was stronger and faster and taller. She tried to pry him off, her fight or flight kicking into high gear but the way he had her pinned made her arms pretty much useless. Black spots danced across her vision, her hand found purchase in his hair. She tapped out a message for him, her strength fading so her fingers didn’t move very well but she hoped he got the message.

 _It’s okay. I love you. Do what you have to, father._ Lack of oxygen caught up to her and she passed out. 

When she woke up again she was face down in water. She kicked herself up and got her head above water. Her lungs dragging in air like it had been without it for so very long. She stumbled her way to the shore, submerging herself more than once on the short trip there. Wiping the water from her eyes, she checked her pockets. All she found was a piece of a map of Lian Yu marked with blue and red ink. She followed the red line of ink to a circle with an x on it, above it was the word Shēngcún. She smiled and laughed. He had done it. He had found a way to set her free. Maybe he would even get away from Fyers and would meet her there. She could do nothing but laugh. She was alive and safe from Fyers who no doubt believed her to be dead and her father had saved her again.  
She got up on shaky legs, her body protesting the movement but she could waste time. Her broken ribs and bruised jaw be damned, her father was waiting for her. She kept going, keeping watch for Fyers men, sleeping only when it was absolutely safe to do so. After the second day of walking, the hunger began to set in. her father was able to slip the map to her because it was small and easily hid but food was another matter. Her stomach growled. She hadn’t eaten for two days. But she didn’t know enough about the island so say for certain what was and was not safe to eat. After a few more days, she had reached the place marked on the map. She couldn’t contain her joy, not only had she found but she did so and survived. 

It was a broken up plane, cargo by the look of it. For once she was thankful her father convinced her to work with him on planes. She approached quietly, just in case Fyers men were around. All she could hear were birds and insects. No snapping twigs or the bang bang bang of gunfire. She slipped into the door, the large hole separating the body from the nose of the plane covers by mesh of some sort. Sunlight lit it up from the hole in the roof. There were supplies here, so someone had to live here. She hoped that if her father wasn’t here, whoever was was friendly. A Thud came from behind her and a strong man with a grip like a vice grabbed her, a very large blade at her neck. 

“Twitch and I will open your throat.” The voice of a man snarled in her ear, her body tensed in panic and she didn’t move.

“How many more with you?” he shook her and she gasped. Stuttering out a what.

“You have ten seconds to tell me something I believe before I cut out your voice box.” She could feel hot breath on her ear, smell his scent. She whimpered. Her father was wrong about this man. 

“W-Wait… Wait… my father… Yao Fei sent me…” she felt him retreat just a hair.

“Pretty s-sure it wasn’t for you to kill me.” The man shoved her away and point the sword at her. It was so close. If her body swayed she was getting cut. 

“ _What?_ ” he looked confused. 

“Yao Fei. My father. He gave me directions to your… plane.” His eyes looked her up and down, narrowing slightly. Obviously not seeing any kind of resemblance. 

“He saved me. Kept me safe. Please, you have to believe me!” she begged. No, she was not above begging right now. 

“Yeah. Taking in lost puppies is like him.” The man dropped his sword, sheathing it on his back. She swallowed; relieved she wasn’t going to die today. She showed him the map, and he seemed to believe her. 

“This place is safe? I figured that’s what he meant by survive.” The gruff man with dark eyes and equally dark hair shook his head. 

“It is but no. That’s not what he meant. There is an air strip about ten klicks from here.” He walked around her. Pointing in a direction she couldn’t name. 

“It’s key off this island. Yao Fei and I have been observing it for months.” As he kept talking she studied him. It was no surprise her mind registered danger. He was much large than her father and probably just as strong. But she did feel relatively safe with him. 

“We were supposed to get off this island together but we got separated.” He opened a plastic crate and pulled something out. He tossed it at her and she barely caught it correctly so she didn’t slice her arm open on the blade exactly like the one had put to her throat. She stared at it then at him.

“W-What…” she didn’t get a chance to finish. 

“I think Yao Fei sent you here because he knows that I cannot take the air strip alone.” His face was neutral, like it wouldn’t make much a difference if they lived or died. Succeeded or failed. 

“Yeah. Sounds like him.” She sighed. She didn’t look down at the sword in her arms. She didn’t want to think about she would do with it. 

“He is a softer judge of character than I am. If you’re going to have my back I need to know you can cover it.” In a split second, he unsheathed his sword and swiped it at her. She ducked but his swing came back, the steel of their blades meeting. A flick of his wrist and her blade was batted aside and his rested against her neck. 

“What are you doing? Fight. Back.” He hissed. She growled in frustration, bringing her sword down onto his shoulder. He ducked and pivoted away, slicing her mid-section. 

“Keep your blade up. Always stay behind your sword.” She had dropped her arm to cradle the cut but he kept up that threatening stance. Arm out, feet shoulder width apart, breathing even. She swung as she lunged and he batted her away and sent her face first into a pile of crates. 

“You have no strength. No skill. No training. To say you fight like a girl would be a compliment!” 

“I am a fucking girl!” she hissed back. Her hair fell down to brush her shoulders but it was her height and baggy clothes that made her appear to be a very slight male. That really took him by surprise and she lunged again. Sword in front of her and her feet planted.

“I told you! I’m not a soldier I was just shipwrecked here!” She missed and he held her at sword point. 

“I stole this uniform from a guy I killed on accident!” she tightened her grip on the sword at her side. The fingers of her other hand drumming against her thigh. Something she always did when she wanted to shut out some memory or feeling she didn’t want to deal with. 

“Where was Yao Fei?” his voice seemed to growl like an animal.

“He told me to run. So I did.” She drummed harder. Faster. He gave a solid hit to her head and she fell out. She came to again, really sick of being knocked around, sitting in a plane chair with his back to her. She tried to move, stopping when she felt the bite of coarse rope around her wrists. Both swords strapped to his back, he dropped the canteen from his lips and turned to face her. Yeah, now the alarm bells were going off en masse in her brain. 

“Sorry. It’s nothing personal.” He said and she looked at him, stilling in her attempts to wiggle free. 

“The air field is a heavily guarded position. I’ve been there and I cannot take it on my own.” He walked in front of her and drew his sword. She really needed to get her brain in order. Half of it was screaming at her to keep struggling and get away. The other half was more focused on how sexy his accent was and how much better it was in that hoarse voice. 

“S-So what? You’re just gunna k-kill me?” she shifted back as far as the chair would allow, the sharp edge of the blade against her throat. Oh god if she breathed wrong…

“Like I said. It’s nothing personal.” Like that really made her feel better. She wiggled her wrists again, feeling the bonds grow tighter. 

“But if you’re alive, they will find you and they will torture you until you give up my location. And I cannot allow for that to happen.” His voice grew harsh. She was at least grateful he wasn’t going to off her simply because he could. He took the blade away from her, as if to swing but she jacked herself up and out of the chair.

“Hey! No wait! Please! Please don’t do this! I won’t say anything. I swear!” on this crazy island, she was not above begging. Not even if it only meant a few extra minutes to try and escape. She doubted if she ever would be. He shoved her back down into the chair and she hardly felt the impact, only how it jostled her ribs. 

“Don’t make this more difficult.” She panted, not really listening to him.

“I can do this in a way that you will not feel it at all.” He looked away from her. Remorse. He was feeling remorse. She doubled her efforts; she had a promise to keep to her dead father and one to her surrogate. She twisted sharply, a crack sounding from behind her but she wouldn’t pay attention to it other than the moment or two of shouting. It wasn’t important, and unimportant things got people killed here. The rope fell off of her hand with a dislocated thumb. She got up from the chair and punched him in the jaw with everything she had. He grabbed her shoulder roughly and she called out in surprise. His body barely moved and she had put everything into that hit. He brought them nose to nose and laughed. Fucking laughed. He sobered and took her hand in his much larger one. 

“Slade Wilson.”

“Olivia Queen.” 

“Well Olivia Queen, there might be a fighter inside of you after all.” She looked down at the floor then back at him. Her brain telling her body to go nuclear with anger. 

“Was that some kind of test?!” she hissed at him. He laughed again and her anger did not subside at the sound. Not. One. Bit.

“I was going to kill you, make no mistake little girl. But if I spared because you begged me without you fighting for your survival? I’d be a fool and we’d be dead fools if we tried to take that air field.” She wanted to hit him again.

“You can try but that punch you got in I allowed and you won’t be getting another.” Great. Just great. Now the asshole could read minds.

“No I can’t, you’re easy to read. And you were talking out loud.” Fuck. She looked at her hand, the thumb bent at an odd angle but she didn’t feel it. In fact, the whole digit had gone numb with pins and needles. She really hadn’t been paying attention when she did it and hadn’t seen it either. So how did she get it back in? She tried to move it, biting her lip to keep the groan in but happy at least that it had obeyed the mental command. She looked at Slade, bent over what looked like a wheel rim, trying to start a fire.

“Hey Slade?” he grunted in response.

“Umn… do you know how to put a joint back in?” he looked at her from over his shoulder. Sighing as he shook his head. With the fire started and the sun going down quickly he crossed the space between them. Taking her by the arm and frog marching her to the fire and she really looked at her hand. The other four fingers were fine; the thumb was pressed into her palm but the ridge of the joint were the thumb connected to the hand was missing. Slade held her hand gently, poking it lightly. 

“You were really determined to get away.” 

“Well, there was this guy who was trying to kill me.” He grunted again and brought her hand closer to the fire light. 

“It won’t hurt. We’ll go on three.” 

“I said that out loud?” 

“No, everyone asks that.” he chuckled. She tried to keep her breathing even so she wouldn’t tense up. She heard it hurt worse if you did. Without warning, he snapped her thumb back into place and covered her mouth to stop the scream she was trying to let out.

“You said it wouldn’t hurt! What happened to ‘on three’?” she hissed as she cradled her sore hand.

“I lied. First rule of the island, Kid. Trust no one.” He drove the point home by telling her that he would kill her if she screwed up his getting off of the island. 

“You need me just as much as I need you.” She snapped at him. He covered his mouth with a chuckle. As if he couldn’t believe she was getting mouthy with him. A trained killer if the militarized way he carried himself was any indication. 

“So what do we do now?” she flexed her hand, finding a small delay and a sharp pain. If her life depended on it, she found, pain didn’t register.

“Turn you into something that won’t get us both killed.” She rolled her eyes at him. It didn’t matter how long anyone had been on this island. Eye-rolls were the universal sign of “no? really?” she looked at him in confusion when he told her to pick a weapon. It was dark outside. Yao Fei never went out after dark. It wasn’t safe.

“We’re starting now?” he leaned forward in his chair. No eye roll necessary for him. She got up, walking over to a chest, opening it to find a manner of weapons she wasn’t familiar with nor did she want to have to use one. But this island seemed to make weapons a priority for survival. She saw something in with the weapons. She flipped it over to find a mask. One half of it was black the other was yellow. Cue panic mode.

“That’s mine.” Never mind. Cue anger.

“ _You’re_ the lunatic who tortured me?!” she spat. She wished she suddenly developed laser eyes so she could fry him where he stood. 

“No. That mask is the operational equivalent to a balaclava. My partner and I wear them during missions to keep our identities classified.” He stood right in front of her. It had to be him. It was the same mask. They had the same build and height.

“You lie,” She whispered, suddenly very afraid or very nervous about their proximity. “Fyers said-”

“Because Fyers is such a trustworthy individual?” he popped a brow at her. He had her there. 

“My partner and I came to this island to rescue Yao Fei. We’re ASIS, Australian Intelligence.” Okay, so it wasn’t a farfetched idea that other countries had a Black Ops group. From what she had seen? This guy definitely fit the bill. 

“Now. You are going to find yourself a weapon. Have you considered a sword? I like swords.” The small smile he gave her sent shivers down her spine. Mostly, not the good kind.


	4. Episode 4: Head-On Collision

Their days blurred together in a sequence of wake, eat, Slade beat the shit out of her, eat, then sleep. First, they started with hand to hand combat. She had never really had to fight before; Tommy had always done that for her. Her swings were sloppy, stance uncoordinated, and she always set herself off balance. All of which, Slade used to his advantage to the point where he barely had to lay a hand on her. She beat herself up. This particular training session was early in the morning. She had barely slept that night. More nightmares about the corpse of the man she had murdered coming after her. She doubted that Slade cared. Even with Yao Fei, his eyes had shown her some emotion that let her know he understood. She swung at him, her body following so that her feet left their stance and she was once again off balance. He ducked a moment before by bending back, just out of her reach. Twisting his body to the side as she swung with her other hand to grab her and fling her around. She hit the ground and he was on top of her. A knife he pulled from somewhere in his hand and at her throat. She struggled for a moment and he dug the knife in closer until it nicked her. 

“Dead.” He let her up and made her get to her feet herself. He handed her a knife and she held it tight in her fist so that she wouldn’t drop it. She held it in a reverse grip, the tip aimed at the ground. She sped forward, bouncing on the balls of her feet as if she were afraid to approach. She brought the knife down once she was within striking range. He moved away and grabbed her arm when it was farthest from her. Pulling the knife from her hand on pushing her away so she spun and landed on her back. 

“Very dead.” The third training involved them in close quarters, each holding a stick of bamboo in either hand. The sequence was easy to understand and she picked it up immediately. Strike, block, counter. Strike, block, counter. Over and over until she wasn’t sure who struck first, who blocked who, and who countered. She couldn’t help the smile on her face. Finally, something she didn’t completely suck at. Until Slade hit her with a cheap shot to the face that sent her, once again, face first to the ground. She pushed herself up, sticks forgotten and the circled each other.

“How did you survive here for six months?” yes, she had been here for six months. Twenty-six weeks. One hundred eighty-two days. 

“I know girl scouts with more fight in them.” 

“Fighting girl scouts now Slade?” she couldn’t help the taunt. To which he responded by smacking her hand with his stick. 

“What the hell?” she groaned loudly.

“Listen kid. We have ten days till that supply plane lands. Ten day to turn you into at least half a soldier. So start taking it seriously.” She growled and took up a stick. Bringing down, aiming right for his head. He grabbed it and smacked her ribs. He pulled her stick in a circle. Wrenching from her grasp and hit her back with both. 

“What is the point of this?!” she screeched. “These soldiers carry guns. _Guns_. Not sticks! Who the fuck can intimidate someone with a stick when they have a gun in their face?” he made a sound that was half sigh and half growl. Pulling his side arm free he held it out to her. 

“Jam this in my face.” She looked back and forth between the gun and his face.

“Are you out of your mind?”

“Do it!” she took it and pointed it at him. Finger off the trigger and resting against the barrel. Her grabbed her arm underneath his and turned so that they were back to back. Looping his free arm under hers, he tossed her over his shoulder. When she rolled to look up at him, he hand the gun pointed at her. Finger on the trigger.

“I give up!” she said, completely defeated. “I give up.” He clenched the front of her shit in his fist and hauled her to her feet. Gun inches from her nose.

“There is no giving up to these guys! No begging or buying your way out. You have two choices: escape or die.” She was sure that if she answered wrong she was dead. 

“Escape.” She breathed, his scent doing wonders for her nerves. 

“Then let me show you how not to die.” He took the gun from her face and pushed her away. He picked up two of the sticks and tossed one at her. They began again and didn’t stop until well past night fall. She ate whatever he gave her, not really caring about the what. As she ate, her mind went back to her home in Starling City. She was sure that she would be able to take on an attacker from there. But these were trained thugs she was being forced to deal with. Much like she had to deal with the one she had killed. She tried to pretty it up. That it was a him or her situation but it really wasn’t. She had made it that way by attacking him when she could have stayed hidden. She wasn’t aware of when her fingers started tapping her thigh and she really didn’t care. She didn’t _want_ to care. 

“Kid.” She looked at him without a word. “Why do you do that? The tapping?” 

“It helps. It’s what… what I do when I don’t want to deal with something.” She looked back at the fire. Right into the flames. He didn’t say anything after that. Neither did she and she was fine with that. Her fingers kept drumming. Probably even after she fell into a fitful sleep. 

She woke with a gasp the next morning, the remnants of the reoccurring nightmare fading like the morning mist. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes she sat up from the pile of who-knew-what she used as a bed. Stretching until her joints popped back into alignment from yesterday’s training. She looked around for Slade but didn’t see him. She stayed still and listened for a moment, thinking that this was one of his ambush trainings. She heard nothing but the call of a bird that was far off. A twig snapped and she looked at the door to the plane, watching him come in with breakfast. He skinned and skewered the animals without a word, handing her one when they were cooked enough not to kill them. He had given her a whole one.

“Slade what-”

“Eat up, Kid.” 

“Are you teaching me something new today?” she asked after a bite. 

“Yeah. So eat up. You’ll need your strength.” She ate everything that was edible, her stomach grateful for the extra calories. When she was done she got up to go outside when he stopped her.

“I thought we were training?” he stood in front of the fire.

“We are. In here.” He motioned for her to join him and she did. He was silent for a moment. His eyes searching her face. “Tell me about your nightmares.” She jerked in response. 

“I am always scared out of my wits here, Slade. What’s a few nightmares?” 

“You talk in your sleep. Say the same things over and over.” She narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms.

“What does it matter?” 

“Tell me.” His voice was thick with command and she wanted to obey but didn’t. It wasn’t his business.

“No. I-” 

“Are running from something.” Her arms dropped to her side and her fingers started drumming. Index, middle, ring, pinkie, and back again. He took her wrists in his hands, fingers curling around all the way. He pulled them up so that they weren’t near her legs. They twitched as if they still were. 

“What are you running from?” she tried to wiggle free. To get away from him but he didn’t relent. 

“I don’t-”

“You _have_ to deal with it! Not dealing with it will get you killed.” He snarled at her. He didn’t have a lot of patience and she was running through it at record speed. Her fingers on both hands started to twitch even harder. 

“Then tell me! How does the Great Slade Wilson deal with being a murderer! Hm?!” 

“I deal with it! I face it head on and remember that it was a them-or-me situation! Like you need to.” 

“Well it wasn’t for me! I killed him in cold blood!” she took a step forward so that she was right in his face. The confession of what she hadn’t wanted to admit abruptly stopped the high octane anger she felt at him for forcing this out of her. 

“He… he hadn’t noticed me. I was hiding and he walked right by me… would have kept going if I hadn’t attacked.” Her voice crack and her fingers went still as she dropped to her knees. Tears would probably anger him more so she kept her face down so he would see. He let go of her wrist and she slumped forward. Resting on her forearms and knees. 

“Listen to me, Kid. It was him or you. He might not have noticed you then but he would have. And if there was one man in the area you can bet that there were more.” He got onto his knees before her, a gentle hand on her back. The hold her teeth had on her lip released and she let out a sob.

“I killed him… I should-” 

“Be punished? It won’t make you feel better.” He pressed on her shoulders, bringing her up to sit on her knees. She kept her head bowed, she was ashamed.

“Every time I attack, you move to block or deflect but your body freezes when you start to move so you take the hit. You have to deal with this, Olivia. Or you’ll break your promise to your father.” her teeth clenched down on her lip again until it bled. She didn’t want to talk anymore. If she did, she knew she would admit to that too. She let herself get hit. She was trying to get herself killed. He took her chin in his fingers, turning her head up to look at him. His gloved thumb wiped away the blood that had dripped down. 

“You have to come to terms with this, Olivia. You took his life because you had too. You are no more damned for it than I am.” She launched herself at him. Burying her face in his chest, holding his flak jacket in a white knuckled grip. 

“Just… let me have this okay? You can beat me for it later.” He wrapped his arms around her. Whether it was because she was crying or because she could finally let herself feel all the fear and relief she had felt but tamped down, her shoulder shook. 

“Take as long as you need, Kid.” And he allowed it. For the next who knew how many hours, he let her cry into his chest. 

Inwardly, her mind churned over his words. She let herself get hurt because she believed she should be punished for the life she took. In her search for a safe place to hide until Yao Fei could come for her, she had put a target on her back. Fyers and his men would have made her death unbearably painful had they found her. She made the decision to not let that happen so she tried to kill a man. Regardless of how it happened, it was her actions that led to his death and her continued survival. He was right. No amount of bruises or bloodshed made her feel any better about it and it hadn’t brought him back either. 

“I’m sorry.” When he didn’t respond other than letting her free of his strong arms, she continued. “I wasted a morning of training.”

“Not a waste. This is a hard lesson to learn.” She missed the feeling of his arms around her. She took the hand he offered and got up on shaky legs. Wiping away the tears that still clung to her lashes, she  
met his gaze. Resolve steeling her.

“Shall we continue with my ass beating?” 

“You still have much to learn.” He laughed. She liked that. The sound of his laugh. 

They continued to train for the next few days. Progressively, she got better. It wasn’t enough to beat him, most likely she never would. Every training session got harder. He pulled his punches less and less. She still ended up with horrible bruises and welts at the end of the day but that was only because he was better than her. She was done taking hits. The night before the plane was due to arrive he laid out the plan. Showed her the pictures the ASIS had taken. Showed her were the guards were stationed and how many there were. Ten men at any given time was a lot, she knew he could handle it easy but couldn’t resist the jab. He rolled his eyes at her and grunted. Showing her a picture of a tall structure with glass around it.

“The glass is bullet proof so I can’t take out the man inside. You’ll have to do it. Up close and personal.” She swallowed thickly as he asked if she was ready for that.

“Do you think I am?” he turned to face her. A seriousness in his face that unnerved her. 

“I think that the supply plane comes once every three months. We miss it and we’ll die soon after. I pick leaving.” She nodded. 

“But what about Yao Fei? We could get a message to him or-”

“Forget about him, Kid. Get some sleep. We leave at 0600.” She didn’t like this idea but didn’t say anything. She went over to her cot and lay down under the blanket. She took out the pictures and stared.  
Slade called over to her that she’d be back with them soon. She was so sore and exhausted that she fell asleep quickly. 

She woke up the next morning at dawn with his hand on her shoulder. He had a wide smile on his face as he greeted her. She caught the two packs he threw at her and he put on his blades and his sniper rifle. He picked up his mask then dropped it back into the crate and shut the lid. Following after him when he barked at her to get a move on. The walk to the air strip was easy, even with the two packs on her back and his pace. All the training had done wonders for her stamina. She couldn’t help but feel that she had missed out on a chance to sleep with him last night. She might very well die today and yet all she could think about was the way his ass looked as he moved. 

“All clear.” He said after a moment of taking in his surrounding after motioning for her to stop. It had been a few hours since they left and it was taking its toll. 

“Can we rest for a minute?” 

“You can rest on the plane.” 

“Yeah. I’m so looking forward to that in-flight movie-” a small click came from underneath her boot and she froze. 

“Oh god.”

“Don’t move!” he snapped as she rocked back. He dropped his rifle and lay flat against the ground, digging out around her foot.

“Is that a mine?” when he gave the affirmative she groaned. “They mined the island?”

“Probably Japanese. Left over from World War II.” He got up and looked at her with no emotion on his face.

“Can you disarm it?”

“Without disarming you?” oh god. She was going to die. He would keep his promise and she had just screwed with his chance of the island royally. 

“Soldiers.” Now he looked concerned. She was the one fucking concerned! 

“They’re going to see us.” She panicked after turning to look at them. 

“They’re going to see you.” He said as he wrenched the packs off of her, grabbed his rifle, and took off. Deaf to her please to not leave her there. She quickly put the mask on and coughed a few times to make her voice hoarse and deep.

“What are you doing so far from camp?” goon number one asked. 

“Got separated from my unit.” Sucker bought it.

“Come with us.” _Shit._

“I-I can’ t. Kind of having a bad day.” Goon number one walked around her and finally noticed the mine. With a loud war cry, Slade charged in with his sword held high, she ducked and covered her head. Dispatching one after another in quick succession until all three lay on the forest floor. Dead. He knelt next to the body in front of her. 

“Be still.” He said. He then rolled the body into her and knocked her off of the mine. Putting the body on top of the trigger before it even registered that it no longer had any weight on it. Sitting on her ass and looking at the corpse that just saved her life, she glared at Slade.

“You’re an asshole. But thanks.”


	5. Episode 5: Failure to Launch

At nightfall, they made camp which still made her very nervous. She told him as much as she attempted to start a fire using two sticks. She struggled with it for two hours while he cleaned his rifle.

“Take it you never learned any survival tips from the scouts.” 

“Again. I am a girl. They don’t teach the girl scouts how to build fires.”

“Actually, they do.” She glared at him.

“Fine. What tipped you off?”

“Better hurry. The wolves come out at night.” that made her pause. Of course there were wolves. What hell on earth would be complete without wolves?

“Talking out loud again.” she blushed at his words and stepped up the speed she rubbed the sticks together. 

“Well, you know, you’re welcome to help!” she snapped when he made mention of fire keeping them away. He pulled out a silver square from his pocket and struck it against his thigh. The flame caught on the lighter and he set the pile of sticks a blaze that she had been trying to light. 

“Seriously?! I’ve been at this for two hours!” 

“I know. I was watching. Thank you for the entertainment.” He said as he snapped the scope into place. She sat back and looked at the pictures of her friends and family. 

“Don’t worry, Kid. He’ll be waiting for you with flowers when you get back.” 

“Considering it was his brother I brought with me on the boat that got me stranded here?” 

“Really? Never took you for the type.”

“We never did anything. Sam and I. It was really just for us to have some fun.” It didn’t make her feel better though. She had every intention of sleeping with Sam and she had enough alcohol in her to go through with it. 

“Seemed to me you lacked the spine.” 

“It’s why I have to go back. Make things right.” 

“You’re dumber than I thought if you think you can sleep with your boyfriend’s brother and make it right. Let me tell you, Kid, that is saying something.” 

“Well, you don’t look like the kind of guy to accept apologies.” She snapped at him. 

“Everyone in this life is in it for themselves.” He leaned forward.

“What? You learned that in Australian Spy School?” 

“No. Here.” That shut her up and turned off the snark. He told her about his partner, Billy Wintergreen, who was the man who hurt her in Fyers camp. That they had been shot down before their plane landed and how Fyers offered them a choice. Join them or die. Billy chose to join. Slade didn’t. 

“He was the godfather to my son, Joe.” She really didn’t hear anything he said after the word “son.” He had a kid which meant he had a girlfriend or wife waiting for him. He wasn’t going to sleep with her now. After resting for a few hours, they moved on. The lack of moon made their approach easy. Ducking behind a stack of crates he pointed to the portable tower.

“If he radio’s camp, we’re done for.” He stressed as he handed her one of his swords. When she voiced her worry about the others he just smiled and told her to worry about her one. He’d worry about his ten. 

She took off for the tower. Ducking behind everything she could, staying there for a moment to make sure it was safe before moving again. At the third stop, she got the timing of the roving light down to know when exactly to move and when to stay. She made her way closer to the tower, bringing the ski mask down to cover her features. Slade picked off anyone who got near her even if they hadn’t seen her yet. When he took out two guys carrying another crate she advanced, only to come face to face with another and she froze. She didn’t have to think of a way to talk herself out of this because Slade had snuffed him out before she could. She was sure she felt the bullet fly across her arm. 

She ducked behind another stack of crates and watched as a man with a very large gun exited the tower. Slade took the shot and he dropped and fell down the stairs, then took out the guy who was approaching to see what had happened. She climbed up the stairs slow and quiet. Staying below the window in the door as she strengthened her resolve. She entered quietly, leaving the door open so as not to alert him with the sound. Crouched and inching forward, sword behind her back she lunged and sliced when he noticed her. No surprise the man ducked out of the way and knocked the sword from her hand. He pulled his gun and pointed it at her. Stupidly, she tried the same move Slade had done on her. The man easily pushed her away, his strength much more than her weight. Gun still on her, he picked up the radio phone and brought it to his ear. It didn’t get far before a sword, exactly like the one she was using, pierced his heart. 

“Wow. One job and you even screw that up.” Slade said as the body dropped. He handed her a gun.

“I’m going to make sure it’s clear. Lock the door behind me and don’t let anyone in that isn’t me. Try not to shoot yourself by mistake.” He left and she did as he told her. Determined to get at least one thing right. She put the gun on the table and eyes the sat phone before walking to it. One call. Once phone call and her family would know where she is. She picked it up and dialed. Listening to the beeeep of the line connecting.

“Hello?” said a voice. A masculine, soothing voice that she had heard so very often months ago. She put a hand to her mouth. To stop the sigh or the sob, she wasn’t sure.

“Hello? Is anybody there?” _Lucas._ Before she could answer, hands gripped the sat phone and ripped it away. Damaging it and ending her call. She whirled around on Slade. 

“Have you lost your mind?” she growled, murder one her face.

 _“Island Tower. This is Skyhawk 801 Foxtrot. We are seven hundred kilometers southeast of your position. ETA three hours and twenty-two minutes. Over.”_ Slade bent down to the radio, picking up the receiver.

“Island Tower to Skywak 801 Foxtrot. Acknowledged.” There was a click and static as he ended his transmission. He repeated it when they didn’t answer. 

_“Of all creatures that breathe and move upon the earth.”_ Slade asked them to repeat after telling her it was a challenge code and what it was for. Things in her brain clicked.

“Wait. Wait. I know this.” She laughed. “The one book I read in college.” 

“The hell are you talking about?”

“It’s a quote from The Odyssey. ‘Of all creatures that breathe and move upon the earth, nothing is born that is weaker than man.’” Thank you, Lord Jesus!

“Are you sure about this? If you’re wrong this plane turn around.” 

“I’m positive.” She stopped him before he could connect the transmission. “Bred. Not born. Bred.”

 _“Rodger that. See you in a few hours. Out.”_ Came the voice after Slade had repeated what she told him. She laughed. A full, belly laugh. Who knew the one book she read would come in handy. Ironically, a book about a man lost at sea and trying to find his way home. Slade set the receiver back down and told her she would be back home after a few days at Langston Air Base. 

“Why does that sound like you’re not coming with me?” 

“Oh I am, Kid. After I call in an Air Strike on this island.” 

“What? No! Wait!” she gasped. Slade barely gave her a backwards glance. “You can’t destroy this place. Yao Fei is still out there!”

“Yao Fei is not my concern.” He growled as he crossed the distance between them.

“He is! He is the only reason you came here. He is your mission!” she jabbed him in the chest with her finger. He said that the mission had changed. That Fyers was here for a reason and that reason included Yao Fei. That they needed to end before he could enact his plans for Lian Yu. She knew he was right but that didn’t matter to her. She couldn’t leave him, her father, to die. He had saved her.

“That is your debt to repay, not mine.” They were so close now. Almost nose to nose. She turned away from him, walking around him in a wide berth. He caught her arm but she wrenched it from him. A near inhuman, angry snarl of where are you going escaping his lips. His full lips that she wondered if they were as soft as they looked.

“All my life, all I have ever thought of is myself. I won’t be that person anymore. I have three hours before that plane lands and I am going to use them to start thinking of others.” She breathed in deeply. “I can’t- no, I won’t leave Yao Fei here to die.” 

“If you’re not on that plane in three hours I will leave you here.” She nodded and walked away, turning back at the last moment.

“If I don’t make it back, can you call my family? Just, call my family.” She whispered. His lips twitched, a ghost of a smile on them.

“Sure, Kid.” 

She left the portable tower and ran down the stairs. The predawn light making it easier for her to see and fined her way around. She ran full tilt towards Fyers camp. She didn’t want to think about what would happen if she failed. She really hoped that if she did, she would die knowing that she tried. She hoped that would be enough to put her soul at rest. Moving through the brush was difficult for her in daylight, but with time pressing down on here she didn’t seem to have a problem. Adrenalin ran thick in her veins, turning her blood into a high octane fuel her body drank in greedily. She didn’t have a watch and the sky was getting lighter with each passing moment. She gnashed her teeth together. She really needed to pick up the pace. She ducked behind the bumper as she reached the outskirts of the camp. Letting a group of goons pass her by. She needed stealth for this which meant she only engaged if she had absolutely no other choice. Moving from her spot at the back bumper of a vehicle to the side of the front of another in front of her. A jeep rattled by, a group of masked goons inside. She saw Yao Fei walk into the tent right across from her. From her vantage point, the coast was clear enough for her to make her move. She shot across the space, diving into the brush behind the tent. She listened next to a rip in the side. There was the tap and scratch of someone writing. He was either alone or he wasn’t either way she had to make her move. She slipped in to the slit and he jumped up when he saw her.

“How did you-”

“We don’t have time right now. We have to go.”

“What?”

“Slade and I got to the plane. We can leave, but we have to go.” 

“No.” 

“What possible- your daughters?” before she could tell him that they could get them and go to the plane, Fyers walked in and Yao Fei punched her in the face. Sending the ground up to meet her as her vision went black for a moment. Yellow Mask, Billy, hauled her to her feet and walked her out of the tent and into the central area where there stood a ring of guards. He shoved her into the center and the men closed ranks, cutting off her escape route. 

“Why are you not dead? I saw Yao Fei choke you to death.” Asked Fyers as the men broke apart enough to let him in. 

“Maybe he’s not as strong as you think he is.” She spat. His men laughed and Fyers kept talking.

“So you came back for him. Perhaps, it’s not that he isn’t strong but that he does care for you.” 

“As if. He saved my life. I tried to save his. Debt paid.” Fyers walked into a circle. “He has two daughters. Did he tell you? But I think, he truly does care for you just as much.” She scowled at him. She played poker for years with her dad and you never tip your hand until the last possible moment. 

“Which is why you will make an excellent warning to him.” She froze. Blood, lungs, and heart all stilling. 

“Hold him.” Fyers commanded. In response, the two goons on either side of Yao Fei grabbed him and put him on his knees. 

“What? Another death match?” her voice was even. It totally was.

“No Miss Queen. While blood sport does boost morale, it doesn’t quite do it as well as a woman.” The men not holding her father dropped their weapons and closed in on her. Whatever she felt before that she had labeled as terror and panic was little more than fear and nervousness. Now? Now she felt true terror. She didn’t feel the first man grab her.

Slade had just told the plane that it was clear to land and looked at his watch. The damn kid was late. Even if she was on her way back, she would never make it in time. He told her he would leave her here. So why did his legs refuse to move? Why did his chest ache at the thought of her dying in the inferno he was going to call in as soon as he left? He growled at himself. That girl was a liability. A weakness he didn’t need. With a frustrated roar, he launched himself off of the chair and left the tower. He was going to miss that plane and he was going to make her pay for it. Her tracks were easy enough to find, and she really did run in a straight line for Fyers camp. 

At least she was smart, a straight path meant less time traveled. She should have been back by now even if she hadn’t been able to rescue her father. He wondered how that had happened. Sure, she spent six months with the man but still. A branch snapped to his left and he ducked down to hide himself in the high foliage. With his binoculars he eyed a truck and a small group of Fyers men. They walked differently, as if they were utterly spent. They pulled a rolled up blanket out of the truck. There was an arm poking out of it. A slender arm with fine fingers that he had seen every day for the past ten days. When the truck was well out of sight and he was sure the area was clear he shot over to the small bundle they dropped at the edge of the forest.  
He willed his hands to stay steady as he pulled the blanket away. The tattered material ripped easily, revealing the bruised and battered form of a woman. A blonde woman that was covered in blood and naked. The three scars told him exactly who she was. The scar on her shoulder from Yao Fei shooting her with an arrow when they first met. The two given to her by his ex-partner, one on her stomach and her breast. He picked her up and held her against him. There was a pulse, faint but there. Her arms shifted until her hands were on him, a whimper on her lips. He watched as her muscle strained.  
She’s trying to push me away. But she didn’t have any strength. Only raw, primal need to flee from the source of perceived danger. He held her gently, an arm around her shoulders with the hand buried in her matted hair. He brought his other hand up; the glove he wore was a darker shade of black and shiny. Her body was so broken. He had experience with patching up wounds on the fly with his time with ASIS, but he wasn’t sure there was anything he could do with this level of damage. 

“It’s me, Kid. You’re safe. You’re safe now.” Still she struggled to free herself of him. He shifted her around so he could see her face. His molars grinding; her eyes were bruised, swollen and glued shut with dried blood. He didn’t want to think of how long they had her before he came to get her. 

“It’s okay, Kid. The pain’ll stop soon. I promise.” He moved his hands and she let out a strangled scream of pain. He didn’t bother to stop the wince. What would be the point? She couldn’t see him so he didn’t need to be strong and emotionless in front of her. His hands found where they needed to be, perfectly positioned. One twist. It only took one twist and his promise would be fulfilled. His hands shook. For once, he regretted having spared her life when they met and he regretted what he was about to do.  
She survived by sheer force of will for six months on this hellhole. She had help, but Yao Fei had taught her what she needed when he had been able to and so had he. They were together for ten days, a short time in comparison but they had bonded all the same. She smiled at him. Laughed with him. He never got tired of that sound. Even when it was the giddy laugh of oh-god-I-could-have-died. On this island where everything was trying to kill you, she laughed as if she had not a care in the world and he liked that sound. The thought of a world, even just time on this island, without that magical sound stilled his hands mid-twist. If he did this, he would have to live without her laugh. Her bright smile. Her innocence. 

_I can’t do it…_

He tore at the cloth that they had dumped her into thick strips, braiding them into a semi-sturdy rope. It took a while but he shifted her onto his back and tied her in place so she wouldn’t fall off. Getting to his feet was a chore but he managed. He had to. He ran as best he could back to their home. That damned, drafty airplane. He didn’t have the time to cover his tracks and make sure that they weren’t being followed. He almost said a thank you prayer to god when the plane finally came into view. He quickly carried her inside, sparing a glance back to find movement that wasn’t of the wildlife variety. Finding nothing, he placed her down on his cot and rifled through the contents of every crate. Taking anything, everything, he could use to bandage her. Dropping to his knees beside her, he really hoped it would be enough.


	6. Episode 6: Inferno

By Slade’s watch, it had taken almost four hours to clean and bandage Olivia. He had managed to find a suture kit but it wasn’t enough for all of her wounds. Those he couldn’t stitch shut would most certainly scar over. The worst was the bullet wound. Someone had used a hollow point round to reopen the scar on her shoulder she had gotten from Yao Fei’s arrow. He growled at the thought of that name. What could Fyers possibly have that would stop him from interfering with what had been done to Olivia? His daughter. He took a long pull from the bottle of vodka he found. She was asleep right now, fitful but she didn’t have the strength to move. He had dressed her; thankfully the copilot was a woman of similar size. When she started to stir, he moved to her side with all sorts of _your-okay_ but stopped as her hand started to twitch. 

“It’s okay, Kid. You can run from it. You don’t have to deal with it if you don’t want to.” Sure enough, the minute the words left him that rhythmic tapping started up and her face softened. Her face was still swollen and her movements cause bright red flowers to bloom on the light colored clothes. Even with the alcohol, infection could still set in. He took another drink, that familiar burn setting his resolve. Breaking into Fyers camp to steal medicine was a suicide mission but it was one he needed to do. 

“I’ll be back soon, Kid. Just stay here and rest.” He strapped on his gear and grabbed a rucksack on his way out the door. Fyers camp wasn’t difficult to find and it was in a location that gave Slade the advantage. Butting up against the forest, the trees and encroaching nightfall gave him plenty of cover to see the ins and outs of the camps workings. His binoculars spied Yao Fei in the central area, a group of men standing by him. From where he was, Slade could hear what they were saying. They were talking about Olivia. Laughing. What they did to her and how Yao must be one evil motherfucker to allow it to happen without a fight. Slade gave the man some credit, Yao Fei tore the talker a new asshole and a few other organs with his attacks. Then, Yao Fei walked calmly into the tent closest to Slade. One he hadn’t seen anyone enter or exit in the fifteen minutes he’d been here. Slade slipped down the side of the hill behind the tent quick and quiet tapping out Morse code on the ground. 

_“Are you alone?”_

_“Yes.”_ Came the response. 

_“Olivia needs medicine.”_ Yao Fei left the tent and Slade stayed put. He came back frequently, placing large handfuls of things at a split in the back of the tent Slade sat next to. Vials of pain killers, tons of gauze, and a whole host of other things Slade wasn’t entirely sure how to use. When the rucksack was full he was about to leave when a message stopped him.

_“Is she okay? My sweet girl lives?”_

Slade tapped out a yes and left without looking back. Yao Fei didn’t matter now, only she did. He made his way back to the plane as fast as he had made his way from it. Hurrying a bit more as he hadn’t lit a fire before he left and nights on the island were bone chilling. That’s how she was when he finally walked back into the plane. Darkness, the moon casting enough of a glow so that he could see her trembling form. He set the medicine down carefully and lit a fire bigger than he probably should have. Once there was warmth and light enough he poked through what he had gotten. A soft sigh making him stop and turn. Her eyes were open, clouded but open. 

“Hey. Hey. You’re alright. Don’t move so much.” He placed his hands on her shoulders to push her back down. 

“You… who are you?” 

“I’m a friend. You’ll be safe with me.” 

“I know you…” her face scrunched in confusion. “Slade? Right. Slade. How did I forget?” 

“That’s it, Kid. Do you know your name?” 

“My name… my name…” she concentrated. “Olivia… my name’s Olivia.” He nodded; it was fine if she was confused. That would be normal but full-blown amnesia would be very bad. 

“Plane… are we on the plane home? To Australia?” he shook his head. 

“No. We missed it.” He eased her into sitting up right, so he could give her the medicine she needed for the pain and swelling. She asked why she was hurt and he paused for a moment. If her mind wasn’t ready to cough up that memory then he wasn’t going to force it. He fed her a lie that they had missed the plane because she fell down a ravine. She believed it and apologized the whole time he changed bandages for making him miss it. When he was finished, they split what was left of the rabbit they had gotten yesterday.

“No worries, Kid. It’s just three extra months of training. Three more months to get better.” She smiled at him and his stomach did flips. She was okay. Her smile as bright as it had been yesterday. 

“Thanks for not leaving me behind.” 

“Don’t mention it, Kid. I’ll make you pay for it.” He chuckled darkly. 

He made her wait a week before he allowed her to train and learn to hunt with him. She was very adamant that she didn’t need that much time to heal. He didn’t think she did either but it was better to make her wait so that he could observe her. After three days, she wasn’t out of her mind confused with pain or pain killers and there were chunks of her memory missing. Her name was Olivia Queen but the name held no meaning to her. She remembered being shipwrecked here but not that her biological father had been with her or that he had killed himself so that she could survive. She didn’t even remember Yao Fei, which Slade supposed was good. Going through what she had would be enough to fuck with his head. Never mind his father figure being there and not stopping it. Her mind had wiped clean anything that wasn’t vitally important to her survival. He also used this time to gauge her reaction to him and nightmares. She slept soundly and without tapping her leg. She didn’t shy away from him when he approached nor did she scream and run away in terror when he snuck up on her. All in all, it was as if it had never happened and he didn’t know if that was good or bad. The change in her was more pronounced when they sparred. She didn’t hold back and she didn’t put herself in the way of his blows. Her face would take on a hard expression, cold and calculating. This was something he could work with. Without her mind constantly wrestling with the fact that murder was wrong she took to combat like a duck to water. She got better every day and he actually had to stop pulling his punches and giving her openings. After training, she would smile and laugh though she was out of breath. Her quick wit and biting sarcasm still there. She was, essentially, the same person she had been. 

“When can we try for the plane again?” she asked as she grabbed their dinner from a cage. He had to think of a lie. She still believed they failed the first time because she fell down a ravine before they   
made it to the air strip. 

“No idea. They doubled the guards.” She muttered an apology to the bird and snapped the neck. 

“So suddenly?” 

“Yeah. Must be something important coming in on the next one.” He handed her a knife and she gutted and cleaned the kill. No wince of disgust or remorse. When their kill was cooked he forced himself not to watch her. The way her fine fingers tore through the meat or how her mouth moved as she chewed. If he kept treating her like glass then she might start asking questions. Ones he _really_ didn’t want to answer.

“What if we made the guards lax?” while it was a good idea, the linchpin of it was the how. 

“We’d have to take out a good portion of Fyers’ men. Think you can do it, Kid?” 

“Not really up for debate, is it? Ten men would be hard enough but twenty?” she did have a point. She licked her fingers clean, he was not starting, and brought over the map. 

“We still have two months before the plane comes again. If we make several attacks to the camp, then Fyers will have to pull his men in.” he had to give her credit, the idea was sound and Fyers would have to be stupid not to pull in his men to protect the camp. They made the plan, the best point of entry being the row of tents that butted up to the forest. They figured after three hits or so Fyers would be forced to bring in his men, leaving the air field less guarded. 

They struck at nightfall the next day, training all morning. The attack went successfully, barely any injuries to them and several casualties to Fyers’ men. Olivia didn’t even blink at the carnage she wrought. Slade was impressed, she could tell. The next three attacks went the same. Get in, kill a few people, and get back out. It was becoming harder and harder as Fyers kept bringing in more men but it meant fewer and fewer at the air strip. It wasn’t until the fourth that things had started to go awry. 

She had slipped into the camp easy enough, she and Slade worked on the outskirts of the camp at opposite ends. It was just as dangerous apart as it was together. The knife was cold against her palm. In truth she hated the weapon, it really didn’t suit her but it was what she had and what she was good at. There was a man in front of her, one of Fyers masked goons. Her footsteps made no sound as she approached, he didn’t even know she was there. He was alone. No one passed by and there were no voices. When she was right behind him, she put her hand over his mouth and dragged him behind the tent he stood next to. He looked at her and stopped struggling to get away. Looked right into her eyes and froze. The fear rolled off of him in waves, so heavy in the air she could smell it. There was recognition. He knew her. There was something in his eyes that tugged at her memory. Pain seared her skull, she grit her teeth and held it in. She stabbed him in the heart, twisting and wrenching it free. Watching as his body dropped to the ground and those eyes drained of life. She kept the pain tightly leashed in her mouth until she met up with Slade, then her knees buckled and he ran to her. 

“Kid? Kid, what’s wrong?” she could only grip her head and scream in response. 

“Liv? Come on, Liv, talk to me.” Things flashed in front of her eyes, snapshots coated in static. She was hardly even aware of Slade picking her up and carrying her the rest of the way to their plane. He set   
her down in the cot and held her face in his large hands, the static subsiding and pictures clearing. She focused on him. His hands on her, his breath hot on her face, his lips so close to hers. 

“My head… hurts…” she breathed. 

“Were you hit?” she grabbed his hand as he moved it to move her hair out of the way. It, along with everything about her, had grown so much in seven months. She tackled him. Flinging her body off of the cot and straddled his waist. Bringing herself as close as possible to him. 

“I didn’t fall down a ravine, did I?” he didn’t say anything, just clenched his teeth. 

“That man… that goon… I knew him! Why?!” she shook him. 

“We made it to the air field.” She tightened her hold on his shirt and listened to what he told her. “You went back for Yao Fei, you got caught and they hurt you.” 

Her shoulders shook, one hand uncurling from his shirt and went to her leg. Now it made sense. The uncontrollable anger she felt when she was near Fyers men. The missing time. Why she couldn’t remember anything about life before the island. That name he kept saying must have meant something to her. But that name recalled no emotion in her. So she did the only thing a sane person would do. She smashed their lips together. He pushed her away, face in his hands and she wasn’t as strong as him.

“Liv. They hurt you. Do you understand?”

“I know. But I don’t remember it… it didn’t happen to me.” She brought up her tapping hand and placed it on his face. 

“We can’t cross this line, Kid.” She growled low in her throat, pulling at his shirt to look him in the eye. Mouths just an inch apart. 

“This island changed me. I am someone else! We could die tomorrow or the day after or minutes from now. So fuck your line.” He pushed himself up, hands winding into her hair. Her gaze turned dark in the coming light of dawn. 

“You sure, Liv? I won’t let you go if we go there.” His voice was husky. She shivered at the sound. In response, she connected their lips. 

The kiss was hot, all tongue and teeth and passion. His hands tugged on her hair until her head went back and allowed him access to her neck. Bowing his body enough for her hand to reach the clasps that kept the vest and sheathes in place. He ripped her shirt away, the buttons scattering and his mouth found her collarbone. There were no words spoken. Just harsh breathing, hands gliding over flesh, and clothes that disappeared in a blur. He stood, pulling her with him. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he walked them back to the bed rolls and piles of cloth. He laid her out on the makeshift bed, the scratchy fabric sending jolts of pleasure through her. 

Her hands roamed his bare back and shoulders, feeling the muscles tense and release with his movements. His mouth claimed hers again with bruising force. Gasping when his fingers brushed her center. On this cold and dreary island, he made her feel warm. More than warm. She felt on fire. He kissed his way down her body. The stubble on his cheeks catching her skin and she moaned, low and long. She wasn’t sure when she had lost her bra or panties or when he lost his pants. All she could feel, all she could see, was him. There was nothing else, only them and the heat and sex in the air. His mouth found her nipple on its journey around her body. Tongue swirling and teeth nipping. She arched her body up, trying to feel more of him. He suckled and rolled the other between his fingers. His mouth traveled downwards, tongue dragging along lazily. Her hips bucked as he put his mouth on her most intimate place. 

He looped his arms under her legs and locked hands on her hips to keep her still. Her hands bunched in his hair. It was softer than she had imagined it to be. All thought ran out of her brain as he swiped his tongue at her. Quick and sure, he drove her high above the clouds. A deep rumbling from his chest had her eyes snapping shut. Stars dancing in her vision when he stuck his tongue into her. She was so close, right on the precipice. A hand snaked its way to her breast. The hard numb pinched between his fingers and she went crashing down and into the stratosphere all at once. He kissed his way up her body, still trembling and hypersensitive from orgasm. He sucked on her neck, forcing the blood to the surface. She couldn’t bite back the mewl that left her as he rocked his body into hers. Stretching her to the brink of pain and filling her to the point of ecstasy. Stilling, he looked into her eyes. Their breath mingling like their bodies in puffy white clouds. His dark gaze never leaving hers, he started a hard and fast rhythm. Her body bowing and moving with each powerful thrust of his hips. Her head snapped back as he shifted the angle, hitting that sweet spot deep inside that had her going wild. He growled as he picked up the pace, the erratic pumping tearing a wanton moan loose from her voice box. She let out a strangled cry of his name as he forced her to dance on that razors edge. Cupping her cheek, he kissed her again gently and she shattered apart around him. His cock kicked inside her, never letting up on the crushing pace until both were fully down from the bliss. He rolled off of her long enough to light a fire and settled back down beside her, pulling her into his embrace. She stared at the flames and tangled their fingers together. She wasn’t even aware of falling asleep.


	7. Episode 7: Together Forever

Slade held her close as he attempted to get his breathing under control. They shouldn’t have done that for many, many reasons. All of which he knew and couldn’t argue with. He could still feel her come apart around him, hardening at the memory of it. Carefully, so he didn’t wake her, he untangled himself from her cage of limbs. In the firelight, he could see the mark he left on her neck. He liked seeing it there. Like a sign she wore proudly that proclaimed to the world that she was taken. That she was his. He wouldn’t admit it, but she was right. They could die at any moment on this death trap of a rock, so what did it matter if they fucked? If they kept fucking? All he had done since crashing on this island had been surviving. Now with her, because of her, he was living. He slipped on his clothing and gear silently, leaving without a sound. They needed food and water. His chest swelled at the thought of her relying on him and him providing for her. Whether or not they made it off of this island or spent the rest of their days here, she was his and he was irrevocably lost to her. 

She was still sleeping when he returned. His mouth watered at the thought of tasting her again. She was still bare beneath those meager blankets. Unbidden, he growled. She deserved so much more than ratty covers on a plane. More than a quick romp on a fucking island. His growls quieted to a low rumble in his chest as she groaned and blinked over at him. She sat up and he tossed the canteen at her. The blanket falling to pool around her lap. Her breasts looked so full and inviting. He sat down in front of the fire, turned away from her, and started skinning the rabbits. She came up behind him, only hearing the noise because his body was so attuned to hers. She hit the release on his swords, pulling them away and draping herself over his back. 

“Such a scary look on your face. Did the rabbit really give you that much trouble?” she giggled and he couldn’t help but laugh with her. He finished the skinning quickly and set them to cook, about to touch her but stopped when he realized he had blood on his hands. Taking his hands in hers, she cleaned them both off. The sight of blood on her skin made him remember how exactly he had found her. He didn’t want to see that again. 

“You’re unusually quiet.” 

“Just thinking.” She sat in his lap by the fire.

“Then stop. Just stay here with me.” And god help him, he did as she asked. 

Olivia wasn’t stupid. Missing a good chunk of her memories, maybe, but not stupid. Something was up with him. It couldn’t be that they had had sex; otherwise he’d have planted her on her ass and barked orders for her to get dressed. He didn’t seem to want to talk about it and she knew him well enough that he wasn’t going to budge. They ate in relative silence, as they always did. She wanted to smack him. The sex was great, not really remembering anything to compare it to but great. The post coital nap left her refreshed and recharged and she could still feel the lingering evidence of what they had done. 

“One more hit should do it.” She said as she polished off their breakfast. He looked at her with a mix of shock and confusion. 

“No.” 

“Yes! One more hit to his camp and Fyers will have to drop the guard at the air strip.” her brow twitched.

“I said no. We hit it enough. Anymore and it would be suicide.” 

“Fine! I’ll do it my fucking self then!” she got up to get dressed. Her grabbed her wrist and pulled her back. Her balance going bye-bye, she toppled over into his arms. 

“The fuck you will!” 

“You are not my master asshole!” 

“You are mine and I will not risk you getting caught and hurt again!” he took her biceps and shook her hard enough her teeth knocked together. Ah, so that’s what it was. And here she thought it was he had regretted sleeping with her and was trying to push her away. She didn’t think he doubted her skill, such that it was. He was more worried about her being alone if they struck the camp again. Her heart soared at the knowledge that he cared for her as much as she cared for him. She palmed his cheek, a soft smile on her face as his eyes fluttered closed and he leaned into it. 

“Slade, listen to me. You know as well as I that if we don’t keep hitting the camp for the next two months, he will double the guards again.” his nostrils flared as he pushed air from his lungs. She wondered exactly when they had ended up on the bed rolls and locked in his embrace. His body and the fire beside them keeping the chill from reaching her bare skin. 

“I couldn’t do it… I couldn’t leave you here…” she didn’t speak, didn’t need to because that wasn’t what he needed. 

“I couldn’t stomach it… I can’t... if they catch you again… I won’t be strong enough to survive it.” However he found her must have been bad because he was shaking and pale. She climbed on top of him, making him look at her.

“Then trust in me. Trust me as I trust you and make me better. My strong soldier, make me better so you won’t have to worry.” He was silent; looking into her eyes and seeing her resolve, her will to live. Really live. 

“I’ll make you a better fighter. A stronger one. So that no one will ever be able to hurt you like that again, Liv. I swear it.” She leaned down and kissed him. He returned it just as quickly but he was oh so gentle. She stripped him until he was bare and there was nothing between them. Impaling herself on his erection, she started a slow pace. His hand never left her body. Always touching her as if he was afraid she would vanish if he didn’t. This wasn’t the mad dash to beat death it was before. This was sweet and tender. The only word to really describe it was love.

The next morning, they awoke completely wrapped around each other. As if, even in sleep, neither wanted to leave the other. Things went back to the way they used to be. They trained during the day, ate, and then, deep in the night, attacked Fyers camp. It progressively got harder as Fyers brought more men to patrol the camp. Then it got extremely easy. Fyers brought as many men to the camp as he could while still leaving the air strip well defended. He made them work double, even triple shifts until they collapsed from sheer exhaustion. Made the whole thing easy pickings for Slade and Olivia. They kept the plan the same as always, work at the outskirts of opposites ends then work inward. Olivia had dispatched three goons and was making her way back to the forest to meet up with Slade when footsteps sounded out nearby. She ducked into a nearby tent and held her breath, waiting for the goons to go far enough so that she could leave. 

“Olivia?” she whirled on the voice. It was an older man, lines heavy on his face with equally dark hair and eyes. 

“Who are you?” she asked. The man’s face fell into a look of pure fear before he schooled it. He gave a swift punch to her cheek. She fell to the ground dazed and the next thing she knew, she was in the central area of camp surrounded by Fyers goons. This situation tickled her memory, sending pain and static and snapshots she didn’t understand to pinball around her brain. 

Someone was talking but it was garbled from the high pitch whine in her ears. She tried to focus on the one speaking but looking at him only intensified the pain and images. Some forgotten thing in her mind was fighting to be free but she wasn’t remembering it. She was bone cold and sweating. Her gut twisted into knots and her knees buckled. Something was wrong with her. Something very, very wrong.

_Fear… I’m afraid… This is fear…_

Her hands trembled, wanting to tap against her thigh but the binds on her wrist kept them in place. He was still talking and she was barely aware of answering him in quiet hisses. Her mind clicked the word Fyers to the man. Made sense. He was the only one talking, his stance of power and authority, all the goons looked to him for direction. She didn’t like this man. Something deep inside, past all the fear, she hated this man. Someone came in behind her; she turned slowly, hoping her legs didn’t give out. The man who approached was covered in black; the only ounce of color came from his mask. Half of it was yellow. She growled at him. This man was worse than Fyers. She didn’t know how she knew that but she did. 

“Wintergreen… your name is Billy Wintergreen, isn’t it?” he punched her cheek, her head snapping to the side hard and fast she wasn’t sure how she managed to stay on her feet. 

“I know all about you.” She laughed. She couldn’t help it, she just laughed at him. 

“What kind of man… turns against their country?” this situation was the farthest thing from funny but she couldn’t help it. The laughter was just as good as the tapping, letting her mind wander far from this place. The pictures that danced in her field of vision receded, yet the static noise remained. She could deal with that just as she could deal with this. 

“What kind of coward turns away from what they stood for?” he hit her five more times. Starting at the lower part of her abdomen and worked his way up until her hit the other side of her face. Her knees gave way before they could dislocate from the force of the impact. She was about to face plant the muddy ground when her wrists became free and she caught herself. Mr. Tall dark and silent connected his shin with her diaphragm and gave a punch to her face. The hand that hit her had a sword in it. Bastard made his hit that much harder. Blood dripped from she didn’t know where as he held her neck and squeezed until air stopped flowing.

“Whatever he’s paying you… I’ll triple it.” Did she even have that much money? Did she even have any? She didn’t know. An explosion rocked the spectators followed by blind gunfire and more explosions. The men scattered and left her, dragging in greats gulps of air to inflate her lungs. She took her chance and staggered away to hide behind something. The ringing in her ears was all she could hear and she couldn’t figure out which direction was up. Slade stepped out and squared off against Mr. Creepy. 

“So easy to betray me, Billy?” 

She could tell, even in her stupor, that something was wrong with Slade. His face was hard and cold. Set like stone. He swung his sword at Mr. Creepy who ducked under the swing and responded with a thrust of his own. They kicked out at each other, canceling out the blows and continued to swing their blades. They metal sand as it sliced through the air, shouting with joy when they connected. Slade landed a punch, Creepy kicked his thigh but Slade didn’t lose his footing even on the murky ground. They broke apart and circled, words were spoken but she didn’t hear them. Only her whispered prayers that Slade would survive. 

They clashed again. Creepy trying to grapple Slade, the latter twisting and slipping away from the vice-like hold. Slade took a roundhouse kick to the gut, pushing him back but he didn’t seem to feel the hit. Creepy started a series of wheel kicks, catching Slade on the chin. Slade tried to rush his opponent but was knocked onto his back with a mule kick to the stomach. She went to move forward, to help but Slade waved her off. Motioned for her to stay where she was. Creepy approached and brought his sword down; Slade twisted his body and delivered a solid blow to Creepy’s stomach and kidneys. Taking Creepy’s sword arm in an arm bar like hold, Slade hauled them both to their feet. Landing punch after punch, she winced as she heard the crack of a bone breaking. Creepy was dazed, though he had a small blade in his other hand he could do nothing with it. Slade held Billy close and whispered something in his ear. There was a squelch, wet and sticky, as Slade pushed a knife into Creepy’s eye socket. 

Only then did she leave the relative safety of her hiding spot. Moving to grab Slade in a crushing hug and bruising kiss. He turned to her and she moved to run at him and bury her face in his chest. Cocoon herself in his scent, his very life, when a gun shot rang out and bright crimson shout out of his arm. He grunted and fell. She grabbed a gun by Slade and lifted it, letting off round after round at the one who shot her Slade. She couldn’t aim for shit but that wasn’t the point. They had to get away. She looped an arm under his, groaning with the strain on her muscles. She continued to fire back at their attackers until they were safe and no one was hooting at them. A goon was in front of them; she dropped Slade and rushed him. With a practiced ease she should have, she grabbed his arm with the gun and wrenched it from his grasp. Overcome with fury, at herself and Slade getting hurt for her stupidity, she flung the man over her shoulder. He must have landed wrong because a bone in his arm snapped and jutted out of the skin. She looked at him in disgust, pointing his own weapon at him. 

“I’m not sorry.” She said and fired until the clip was empty. 

When they got inside the plane, she dropped Slade and the gear to find the medical supplies. What few there were after she had gotten injured. Tearing through the whole plane she could find what she didn’t. Hell, she didn’t even know what she needed let alone how to use it. He was shot in the arm so blood loss might not be an issue. Infection definitely was, and it was more likely to get infected if the bullet stayed in him and the wound remained a round hole. The sentence, “what do I do?” rattled around her brain. Oh god, what if she fucked this up? She’d make it worse. He could die.

“… Kid…? Liv?” his voice was so far away from her. She couldn’t breathe. Her vision darkened. 

_Don’t leave me!_ Her heart screamed.

“Olivia! Look at me!” he grabbed her and shook her. Her eyes found his. There was fresh wetness on her cheeks.

“Listen to me. Breathe. That’s it. I’ll talk you through it. I won’t leave you. I will never leave your side.” She breathed with him, matching inhale and exhale. Her heart slowed its race to kill her. Sniffling she nodded and grabbed everything he said to. Knife, gauze, booze, rope, and light a fire. She tied his hands tightly behind his back. She covered the blade and wound with booze, hearing his breath hitch. 

“Now, use the knife to dig it out.” She did as he told her, bile rising in her mouth. He shouted and grunted, his face straining and he stamped his foot. The bullet came free and she gagged. 

“Good. You’re doing so well. Put the blade in the fire, leave it there.” She left it there until the metal glowed angry.

“W-What?” she gagged again when he told her the next step.

“You can do it, Liv. Just put it against the wound. I’ll tell you when to pull it away.” Oh fuck she could do this. 

“You can. Do it.” She got in front of him, holding him like her life depended on it. She would never forget the scream he let out when the blade touch his skin. He bit down on the fabric covering her shoulder, muffling his cries. She dropped the knife and splashed more booze on it, placing the bandage on, she fell to the floor. 

“See? You did it. I thought you would puke.” He tried to joke. 

“I swallowed it.” She chocked. She couldn’t get to her feet so she crawled over to him and undid the knots that held him. 

“Why?” the acid hurt her throat, she didn’t want to speak for days. 

“A man in pain is unreliable. I didn’t want to hurt you.” He got down on the ground and pulled her into his lap. When had she started shaking? He stroked her back gently, his nose in her hair. This was all her fault. 

“What do we do now?” 

“My firework should set him back a ways. But it’s too risky to try for the plane now.” 

“I want go home.” 

“We will, Liv. We will.” He kissed her forehead. Yes, home. She wanted to go home but she didn’t even know where that was. 

“Listen to me, Olivia. If you want to go home then we will. If you want to go to Starling City, where you’re from, then we will. If you want to stay in Australia with me, then we will. Where ever we go, we will be together.” 

“Stop reading my mind.” She hit him playfully on the chest. 

“I’m not. You’re talking out loud again.” he chuckled. They stayed that way until nightfall, not wanting to leave each other’s embrace. They eventually fell asleep that way; dreams and nightmare gone so they could finally rest. 

They stayed close to the plane for the next few days, not wanting to risk getting caught by Fyers men. It had now been eight months since she first came to the island. Every day, Slade got slower and slower. Coughing more and more. Fever sweats and chills through the night. She brought him what food and water she could find, never letting him get up from the bed she made by piling anything soft she could get her hands on. Her worst fear was now realized, she had fucked up treating him and now he was dying. 

“Tastes like dirt.” He said after spitting out the water she got for him. 

“You need to stay hydrated, you stubborn ass.” 

“Hydration isn’t the problem, Liv. My problem is getting a bullet dug out of my arm with a dull blade.” She wasn’t going to get angry with him, it was the fever talking. She peeled back part of the bandage, seeing sticky and coagulated blood that was yellow. Fuck. Her mind reeled and whirled trying to come up with a solution. The snapshots started again. Seeing the older Asian man she saw at Fyers camp but dressed differently. He gave her herbs and water. The herbs healed her. 

“I know what to do… I’ll be back.” She got up and brought food and water over to him to tide him over until she returned. Strapping a gun to her hip and a knife to her thigh and a flashlight in her pocket. 

“Liv? Stay… you won’t last an hour…” 

“I have to get the plants. They’ll fix this.” She kissed him, her promise to him that she would return. He called out to her to bring him back a copy of Maxi from the store. She snorted. 

She wasn’t sure of where she was going but her legs seemed to know which way to go. She emptied her mind and just walked. Letting her subconscious carry her to where she needed to go. She found the cave she had seen in her mind’s eye the same day. The inside of the cave had things inside. Man-made things that told her someone was living there. Clicking the flashlight on and pulling the blade from its sheath she entered deeper. She knew right where to go, right where to find the leather pouch that held the cure for Slade. Putting it in her shirt pocket, she turned around sharply with a bark of ‘whose there?’.

A man came out from behind a column. His eyes, skin, and hair an equal shade of brown. He was bloody, like someone had taken a bat to his head. He limped his way to her, hands behind his back and eye swollen shut. She stared at him, something about him tugged at her memory. Her eyes narrowing as the static whine started. It was his eyes. They filled her with so much hate. He pleaded with her. Telling her that he was part of an exchange student program who was on a fishing expedition when he was shipwrecked. That he was the only one who made it when she asked about the others in his class and the ship’s crew. His ear was bleeding. Like it would have if the eardrum had been ruptured from being too close to a blast. He continued to beg and plead. Crying in fear. She liked that look on his face. 

“Turn around. I’ll free you.” 

“Thank you. Oh thank God.” He sobbed. She came up behind him, knife in hand. She was just about to slice his throat open when a ghostly voice echoed in her ears above the din of static. 

_“Survive, Ollie. Make it home. Right my wrongs.” She knew this voice. She had heard it before. Tears stung her eyes. She bashed the man in the head and ran away. What had she been about to do? That wasn’t her. She didn’t kill people. Regardless of what they did she couldn’t do it herself. Slade. She had to get back to Slade. He needed her. Just as she needed him. She didn’t stop running until she was back at the plane._


	8. Episode 8: Do You See What I See?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to take a moment to thank everyone who has read, left a comment, or hit the kudos button. I am really glad you all like my story. Generally, this follows the flashbacks you see during the show with small changes I made because I thought they would be more powerful.

Three rounds of the herbs later, the infections stopped spreading and Slade started to heal properly. He complained each time she gave it to him. Saying it tasted like an ashtray but it did do the trick. He kept asking Olivia if she was okay and she always responded with yes. Having spent so much time with her, he could tell something had her locked inside her own head. But she wasn’t going to tell him about it unless he forced it out of her. He watched as she did pull ups. She hadn’t even noticed he was shirtless. Something she had always stared at when he did it then pretended to look at anything else when he noticed. 

“That was four.” He said when she dropped down on her ass. 

“Yeah? Well, I’m more of a runner.” She said as she got up and took some water. 

“You sure you didn’t get hurt?” he jumped up to the bar and did the series of up-downs. 

“Hm? No, I told you. Not a bit.” She didn’t call him on his lie. She had done fifty and she didn’t even seem to realize it. He got to ten before he couldn’t take it anymore. He didn’t want to force her; he wanted her to come to him willingly with problems. But it seemed like the lock down her brain was under felt that whatever the problem was, it wasn’t vital. He dropped down and stalked over to her. She looked at him and started to back up but he followed until her back was against the wall and she was caged in his arms.

“Talk to me, Kid. What happened out there.” He was done asking. She looked away and her hands started drumming. It was like they first met. He trapped her hands.

“It’s nothing.” 

“Bullshit. It is something. You don’t think I haven’t noticed you been acting different?” 

“It’s nothing! It’s not important!” she hissed and jammed her forehead into his nose. His grip slackened and she ducked out of his arms. He locked his legs and pitched forward. Catching her from behind, she wiggled and fought. 

“The hell it isn’t!” he snarled. “Talk to me Liv. Let me in…” her struggles continued until they died down to weak protests and whimpers. 

“I don’t know who I am anymore…” she groaned. “I don’t know…” 

“Listen to me. Your name is Olivia Queen the person you were before this island was selfish. This place showed you that. Through all the hurt, the fear, you are still you underneath.” He turned her around and forced her to look into his eyes. 

“There was a man in the cave. I was going to kill him and he never did anything to me. He was scared and alone but I hated him.” Now Slade understood. He had save her life several times before she was caught and he found her. Though her mind locked the memories of what happened down, it still let her remember him. That he was safe. Yao Fei wasn’t because he had allowed it to happen. She killed Fyers men easily, no apology and no mercy. But when it came to animals, whose only reason for death as their continued existence, she mourned and sought forgiveness. Her subconscious allowed her just enough information on Fyers’ men to keep her alive without forcing her to know that painful truth of what she had been through. But the hatred of Fyers and his men, it may have bled out into hatred of any man that wasn’t Slade. 

“This is my fault. I told you to run from it.” If he had only made her deal with what happened… things might be different.

“It’s this stupid pile of rocks.” She had admitted it herself when they first had sex. The island changed her and she allowed it because she wanted to live. He cradled her face in his large hands. Gently.   
Carefully. Because he was afraid he might break her if he didn’t. 

“You’re not the same person you were. But I am here. I will stay by your side and remind you of who you are.” 

“And who am I?” there was panic in her features, like she was afraid of the answer. 

“You, Olivia Queen, are a survivor. You do what it takes to live another moment longer then you beat yourself up over it later because that is your penance. You’re smart. Funny. You don’t take any shit from me and you give as good as you get.” She smiled at him, tears making her eyes glassy. 

“And you’ll stay with me?” 

“Always, love. Always.” He kissed her deeply and passionately. Pouring everything he had to give into it. She kissed him back with just as much fervor. His cock hardened to steel and kicked in his pants. This wasn’t about him, it was strictly for her. He would use everything in him to show her what he saw in her. 

Without breaking the kiss, he walked them back to their bed and laid her down. To him, she weighed next to nothing, so he didn’t even register supporting her fully as he bent her backwards. Her fingers found his hair, nails scraping his scalp. Following the shivers down his spine, he kissed his way down her body. Making his way back up again when he caught the hem of her shirt. Pulling it up and over her head, tossing it to some corner of the plane. Kissing along her jaw and giving her ear a soft nip. 

“So beautiful, Liv. So fucking perfect.” He nipped her ear again, just to hear that airy moan she let out again. Cupping her full breasts through her lacy bra, nuzzling the mounds that overfilled his hands. Kneading them for a few moments, he pulled it off of her. He needed to feel her as much as possible. Nothing between them until they were so close together, they were one. His cock ached, tight behind his fly. The cold air pebbled her nipples, making them sensitive to his touch. And touch them he did. Fingers pinching and twisting. Tongue swirling. He didn’t see her scars. Didn’t feel them. To him, she was smooth and wonderful and oh so innocent. Her legs snaked around his hips, cradling him to her. 

“Do you know what I see when I look at you?” he placed his forehead on hers to look into the clear blue eyes that darkened to a stormy grey. 

“I don’t see the bad you’ve done or think you’ve done. I see a shining light inside you.” His hand dipped down and under the waistband of her pants. Growling low and loud at how wet she was. Just for him. _All_ for him. 

“So strong. Graceful. Your heart, the most valuable treasure in all the world.” Her moans got louder and louder as he brought her to climax, swallowing her cries with his mouth. He couldn’t help but moan with her as her juices gushed around his fingers. 

“I was dead inside before you. Your fighting spirit won my respect. Your convictions, my admiration. Your love thawed my frozen heart.” She sobbed as his fingers continued their assault on her. Her hands gripped his shoulders, nails scoring them. 

“Slade… need you…” she gasped. He stripped them of their remaining clothing and pushed into her core. That tight, wet heat engulfing him. He grit his teeth to keep from coming right then and there. 

“And you have me, Olivia Queen. Even if you don’t want me, I’ll follow you to the ends of the earth.” He laced their fingers together, bracing his weight on his forearms. Her kept looking into her eyes and whispering to her as he pumped his hips. There was nothing else around them. Her hips matched his slow pace; their breathing mixed until neither could tell where one left off and the other began. He made her come three more times before he allowed himself to. Even after, he stayed where he was. His mouth ravishing hers and not wanting to part from her.

Their days continued from there, her momentary meltdown forgotten. They trained, Slade making good on his promise to make sure no one ever touched her again without a fight. In their down time, she played with the broken radio. She wasn’t sure if she was fixing it or making it worse but her hands seemed to know what to do. She had asked him if he ever tried to fix it, to radio for help. Which he responded with that he was better at taking things apart. She always felt a twinge of sadness in her chest when he said that because she knew he truly believed it. She was still messing with it when he came back with a gigantic boar on his back. 

“What? No, ‘thanks for spending six hours in a tree for me baby?’” 

“Thanks babe. I’ll eat a little later.” She said as she continued to fiddle with buttons and nobs. 

“Give it a rest, Liv. You been at it for days.” She could hear the eye roll in his tone. 

“I can do this.” She insisted. 

“Yeah, maybe when pigs fly.” He laughed. The radio clicked and a soft voice came from the speakers. She punched the air in triumph. He dropped to her side and tried to reach the voice but they didn’t seem to notice him. Great. She got it to work but they couldn’t hear them. Fuck her life. She walked away, going to gut and skin the pig because she could at least do that correctly while he turned the radio’s dials. She was halfway done when a voice came from the machine that filled her with rage.

 _Fucking Fyers._ She thought. The asshole was talking to someone about something named Scylla. 

“Scylla and Charybdis. Monsters from one of the four nightmare chapters of The Odyssey.” How did she know that? 

“I want to meet this monster.” He said as he strapped on his gear. She followed suit and trailed after him. 

They ducked down behind large pieces of felled trees near Fyers camp. Men and machines moving around like insects.no, insects were too good for Fyers men. Slade said that Scylla was a monster. Specifically, a Russian made anti-aircraft missile launcher. She blanched at the idea of Fyers having something like that and the kind of devastation he could bring with it. If Slade was right about it, and she had doubt that he was, that hulking piece of metal could track a dozen targets while engaging dozens more. She agreed with Slade that they wouldn’t go anywhere until they knew what Fyers needed that amount of firepower for. 

“That thing could kill thousands of innocent people. We have to stop it.” 

“I know that but how? Even if we got through the small army down there, where the hell would we go with a stolen missile launcher?” he looked back through his binoculars and got a wicked smile on his face. That smile, like his _I-like-swords_ smile, sent white hot heat to her core. She loved that smile. 

“Who said anything about stealing it?” she smiled back at him. This was going to be fun. 

They made the plan to ambush all six soldiers guard the large death machine. First they would have to get them in one place to keep one from radioing for help before they were done destroying it. She pulled the ski mask down over her face, taking five whole minutes to tuck her hair into it. Coughing a few times to deepen her voice they made their way over to the men. Slade had his hands behind his back, two guns fully loaded in either hand. She kept a hand on his shoulder. Shoving him towards the men as they approached. They bought their story hook, line, and sinker. 

“You killed a few of my friends you son of a bitch.” Said one. Slade just smiled at him. 

“And I’m gonna kill many more.” He brought his arms forward and shot each of them several times in quick succession. Not letting a single one escape. God she wanted to fuck him right now. He turned to her with a smile, cold and deadly. He kissed her roughly. 

“Time enough for that later.” They set to work setting C-4 around the launcher when the radio spoke. Telling them they had sixty second before they were outnumbered again. She opened a hatch, exposing the circuit board and computer guts. She took a circuit board as Slade finished setting the explosives. 

“Computers won’t work without them.” She was beyond caring about how she knew what she did. He laughed and kissed her again.

“Leverage.” He grabbed a hand-held radio and they ran back to their hiding spot to wait for Fyers. Slade held the radio out to her went Fyers arrived after sundown. 

“Your plan. Your call.” There was no call. She wanted to go home. Where ever that was, she wanted to go there with Slade. 

“Oh Fyers.” She said in a sing-song voice. Just to piss him off. 

“Miss Queen. I thought I might be hearing from you.” He sounded pissed. Good.

“Oh? Are you missing something?” she knew Slade would disapprove of her overplaying their hand. Later though. Right now, his adrenaline was as high as hers and he just laughed with her and smiled in   
sadistic glee. 

“My men are scouring the island as we speak. When they find you, they will kill you. Very slowly.” 

“Oh please. Without us, you’ll never find it and you’ll be stuck with a very ugly piece of modern art.” She could just imagine the vein in his forehead pulsing in anger. 

“Then what do you propose?” Gotch’ya. 

“Just a trade. Easy-peasy for you.” 

“What do you want, Miss Queen?” 

“I want a way off the island.” 

“You’ve grown up quite a bit, Miss Queen. I’m impressed.” She stayed quiet. “I can get you a boat, but it’ll take some time.” 

“I’d hurry if I were you. Circuit boards aren’t water proof you know and it looks like it might rain.” Not wanting to push their luck any farther, they left without another word. 

They met with Fyers the next day at midmorning. She was more than a little unnerved with the odds but Slade was confident so she would be as well. It was six against two, Fyers and one other not covering their faces. The man with Fyers looked familiar to her. The static rung in her ears and her head pounded. She had to focus and be calm right now. She let her arm go lax and free to drum her fingers against her thigh. The more she drummed the quieter the static got. 

“So glad we could reach an accord.” She gave a side long glance to Slade, not trusting her voice. 

“Oh good. Small talk. We gonna get on with this?” 

“The circuit board. Where is it?” 

“Somewhere safe. Get us to the boat and we’ll tell you.” Fyers looked skeptical.

“And you’ll be honest about its location?” she grounder her teeth.

 _Yes, asshole. Because some of us actually have decency._ She thought. 

“I wouldn’t be but this one has a serious hang-up about principles and integrity.” Fyers’ lips twitched in a cruel smile. Talking about a counter-proposal. He barked at his men and two more appeared with a struggling girl in tow. The one with Fyers, face uncovered, looked horrified and tried to go the girl but was hit in the head with the butt of a gun. 

“You will give me the circuit board or I will kill Yao Fei’s daughter.” The static became a roar as memories flashed in front of her eyes. She remembered him, Yao Fei. Who he was and more importantly, who he was to her. Oh god, how could she have forgotten. 

“No deal then? Fine. Kill her!” the forest floor then exploded into chaos. Yao Fei’s daughter took out the two holding her. Slade shot another two, Yao Fei held one between his legs in some kind of choke hold. Olivia rushed her opponent as he drew his knife, taking his wrist in her hand she turned his momentum and shock against him a brought the blade up and through his chin. The static was so loud. She wasn’t on the forest floor. She was on wet, cold ground. Her body bare, men on top of her. Touching her. She wasn’t even aware of anything going on around her. 

“Well, that was unexpected.” Slade said as he holstered his guns. He picked up a machine gun and fired at the group of men coming at them, giving Yao Fei and his daughter time to take cover. He turned to follow only to stop. Olivia hadn’t moved. Didn’t wince as bullets whizzed by her. Eyes not tracking anything. This was the worst possible time for that to happen. He gripped her shoulder and drug her over to Yao Fei and his daughter. Shit. That’s what triggered it. Yao Fei was shot in the leg, he wasn’t going anywhere. 

“Listen. You are in charge of her. If she gets hurt, I will take double out of your ass.” He barked at the girl. This was her fault. Slade said nothing else, just covered his girl and that bitch with them as they made their escape. When they were safely away and night had fallen, he sat Olivia down and tried to get her to recognize him. 

“Come on, baby. Come back to me. Just run away.” She remained unfocused but she didn’t try to move away from him. 

“He… how did I forget… how… god he… he…” 

“Hush, Liv. Shh. That’s it. Just come back to me.” It took a while but she did. Sort of. Her mind shut down again, blocking out anything it deemed unimportant. 

“Who’s she?” 

“This is…”

“Shado.” The mystery woman supplied. 

“Shado. This is Shado. She’s a friend.” He watched as Liv nodded in understanding. If Slade said she was a friend then she was. There was no need to question it. Olivia’s eyes became clear as she recognized where they were. Scrambling over to the tree where they hid the circuit board. 

“No. no. no. no!” she tore through the hollow trunk. “It’s gone.” 

“He played us.” He growled.

“He was never gonna get us home.” Liv spat. 

“Of course not! He couldn’t take the chance of you warning the mainland.” 

“Oh, and you know what he was planning?” Slade said as he held Liv close to him. Her body relaxing in his arms. Liv touched his arm and shook her head.

“Let’s go back. It isn’t safe here.” They didn’t stop walking until they got back to the plane. When they did, Olivia dropped onto their bed and passed out then and there. Slade was going to disarm himself but didn’t. Not when there was an unknown person around his girl. He started a fire to warm them from the chill of the rain. 

“What happened to her?” Shado asked. 

“Easier question is what didn’t.” Slade wasn’t in the mood for sharing. This girl didn’t have his trust and he wasn’t going to give her any information that might hurt Liv. With the fire lit, he settled in beside Liv, his dominant hand free in case he had to quickly kill off an attacker.


	9. Episode 9: Point Break

The next morning, Olivia was in a fog. She felt as if she was forgetting something important but her brain wouldn’t cough it up. Instead of stewing over it, she cleaned the animal Shado caught for their food while Slade sparred with her. Slade refused to leave them alone together, and that was fine with her. He said Shadow as a friend but she didn’t remember the woman. As she set the birds to cook she watched them spar. It was like something out of a spy movie. 

Shado used her long legs to keep Slade out of reach. Giving him a vicious jab to the ribs, and throwing his arm away to open the way for a kick to the same spot. They grappled each other, side by side and arms locked around shoulders. Shado kicked herself up and flipped around, bringing Slade’s head down. Twisting away from each other, they kicked out. Legs smacking against each other heard enough that Liv’s own legs hurt in sympathy. Shado jumped up, one leg over his shoulder. She jerked backwards, rolling on top of him with her fist high but she didn’t bring it down. A small glint of metal made Liv focus on Slade’s hand. There was a dagger in his palm, against her kidney. They looked so intimate like that. She couldn’t help but feel jealous. Shado was everything she wasn’t. 

“You’re teaching me that one.” He rasped.

“Only if you show me where the knife was.” Slade chuckled and pressed the blade tighter to her skin. Shado got off of him and helped him up.

“Who taught you how to fight?”

“My father wanted a son.” They were close together. Liv stayed put even though she wanted to get in between them. She wasn’t a cave man who needed to stake his claim. Shado walked away and grabbed water, telling her to be careful of the bow because if she broke it she’d end up with shrapnel in her eyes. She wanted to try just to spite the better fighter. 

“You know, it’s pretty exciting that you’re both bad-asses.” She growled at them. 

“She fight?”

“Yes, she does.” Liv snapped. Slade gave her a kiss, quick and chaste, and it made her anger simmer down. 

“Well maybe I can show you a thing or two?” Liv thought she would regret it, but she accepted. She would do anything to keep her from Slade.

_Okay, maybe not this._ She thought as Shado told her to slap the bowl of water. And she did, fully expecting to be laughed at. She felt like an idiot. Like a spike was being driven into her each time she hit the water. Shado said something about the journey of a thousand miles but Liv honestly didn’t care. Only that she felt stupid. Stupid for thinking Slade loved her. That he would keep his promise to stay with her. 

“Okay. Now what?” Liv asked when the bowl was empty. 

“Fill the bowl and start again.” Liv bit back a groan. She was really rethinking doing anything to keep her from Slade. But like the idiot this little exercise showed her that she was, Liv filled the bowl and started slapping it. 

She did it for days. Fill bowl, slap water, fill bowl, slap water. God she was going to go insane. But she did get to admire the view of a bare chested Slade as he did pull-ups and push-ups. Shado was in front of her, upside down in a hand stand with her legs crossed lotus style. For about the ninth time that day, she wished she could go back to it being just Slade and her. At least the soreness of her muscles made her feel like she was accomplishing something. So she asked Shado about why she was on Lian Yu. 

“My father was a general in the People’s Liberation Army. I don’t know the exact details but Fyers plans to use him as a scapegoat.” She didn’t miss the glances exchanged between Shadow and Slade. 

“The government had a few murders committed and blamed my father. Sentenced him to life on this island. I looked everywhere. A few months ago, a man came to my apartment. I had given up hope. Let my guard down.” Shado looked full of hate and she could understand that. She would do the same for Slade. She wondered what her father looked like. She knew she had one but not what he looked like or sounded like. Or even smelled like. Static rung in her ears and she rubbed her temple, her opposite hand drumming her fingers on her leg. Slade stopped his work out and sat by her side. Catching the hand that rubbed her head in his own. The electricity of his touch killed the static and lingering head ache. 

“When can we actual training?” she asked one night after a solid week of water slapping. Slade handed her a cooked fish and she ate it while Shado told her the story of a boy who went to learn kung fu and all the monks told him to do was slap water. After a year, the boy left the temple in shame. When his family asked him what he learned, he slapped the table. Broke it in half. 

“So I can break a table? Wonderful.” 

“Better than that.” Shado handed her the bow and told her to draw it. So she did. To her surprise, the string moved with her hand as if it were loose. Now, she felt bad for every single malicious thought she had concerning Shado. And so Shado taught her how to shoot it and hit her mark. 

She tried for several days but couldn’t seem to get the hang of it. She was getting frustrated. Slade tried to encourage her, in his own way. It didn’t stop the helpless feeling that grew in her stomach every day. Every day that passed was one more for them on borrowed time. One more day closer to death for her or Slade. Shado and Slade made several plans for rescuing Shado’s father and to damage Fyers plans. She didn’t care about Shado’s father. She cared about Slade and , oddly enough, she cared about Shado too. She was like a sister, a feeling Liv was familiar with but didn’t know why. She wanted Shado happy and if rescuing Shado’s father made her happy then Liv was willing to try. 

“We’ll need cover.” Shado said as Liv finally started paying attention to their plans. 

“Yeah? Rifle’s flushed so who’s gonna provide it?” 

“She will.” Yeah, right. Liv couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn if she tried. 

“She can’t hit a target if it stood two feet in front of her. No offense, babe.” 

“No. I was gonna say the same.” No point in lying about her skill. Or lack thereof. 

“She’ll hit her mark by sundown. If not, we do it your way.” She seriously thought about tanking todays training. 

She and Shado walked through the forest with the bow and about fifty arrows. When they reached the spot where they trained, Shado drove each of the arrows into the ground tip down. Liv tried to hit the tree. Not just a tree but the tree she was trying to hit. She didn’t know why she couldn’t do it. She tried to focus her mind on the task at hand but it seemed to have other ideas. Splitting it in half between learning to shoot the bow and the other bounced around like a rabbit. Wondering about what she knew and what she didn’t. How she knew to do things she didn’t remember learning to do. All of the blank spaces in her memory. In a way, she preferred the blank spaces to stay there. It was like her life began with Slade, and wasn’t that romantic. 

“What’s on your mind?” she dropped the bow, letting out a sigh. Otherwise, she remained silent.

“I told you how I got here. Why don’t you tell me?” Shado sat down on a log and she followed. Sitting down next to each other, she stared straight ahead. She could feel Shado’s eyes on her.

“Dunno.” She never actually said it out loud. “I don’t remember it.” 

“Do you know why?”

“I guess what happened when I got caught by Fyers.” 

“What happened with him?” 

“Dunno that either. We don’t talk about it.” 

“Maybe that’s why you can’t focus.” She thought about it. Wondered often if that was the reason she couldn’t focus. Why her mind flew elsewhere when the static got loud. 

“I asked him once. Never did it again. He looked so sad and I didn’t want to make him relive   
it.” 

“We tried for the supply plane. Thought we could hijack it when it landed. We were so close but I… I went to Fyers camp. I had to get someone. I don’t know who but I just had to get them. Slade said he found my body in the woods.” 

“How did he find you?” 

“I can’t remember. I just woke up and there he was. My world began with him.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“I… I actually feel better. Finally saying it.” Shado smiled at her and helped her up. 

“Good. Now, try again?” She smiled back and took an arrow. As she drew it back and breathed, her mind was silent. She let the arrow fly and it hit dead center of the tree she was aiming for. 

Slade and Shado kept planning while Liv did the hunting. She liked it, gave her practice. And it allowed her time to become familiar with the surroundings. How to find her forward and back. What she could climb and what would be difficult for her to do so. She figured Slade and Shado would easily be able to do anything she found difficult without even trying. She managed to find three rabbits, one for each of them. As she made her way back to the plane, she was going to jump out and surprise them but stopped when she heard them talking. 

“You have to tell her.” That was Shado’s voice. 

“I don’t have to and I won’t.” Slade sounded angry. She flattened herself against the side of the plane next to the door. 

“It’s hurting her! The not knowing. Don’t you care?” 

“Of course I care!” he snarled. “She is my whole world.” 

“Then help me understand. Why do you let her stay in the dark?” someone sighed. They were talking about her. Shado didn’t know what she was talking about. She told him how sad he looked when she asked him about the missing memories. It didn’t hurt her because she didn’t matter. Only Slade did. 

“You saw what happened. When Fyers said he’d kill you. Yao Fei treated her like a daughter, she was his daughter. It triggered all those suppressed memories and she couldn’t deal with it.” 

“I didn’t know.”

“No, you didn’t. You also don’t know that every time she checks out? Her mind breaks a little more. She forgets more. I can’t tell her. Not when it might destroy her.” 

“Is that why she accepted me? Because you told her too?” No, that wasn’t the only reason.   
Slade said Shadow as a friend, so Liv trusted her not to slit their throats. 

“She would have warmed up to you eventually.” 

Why were they talking about this? She had told them if what she had forgotten was important then she wouldn’t have forgotten it in the first place. She like Shado and Slade; loved them even. They were like an odd family. She didn’t want them fighting. But she was the root of the argument so what could she do? Reassurances hadn’t convinced them. Shado wanted her to remember, or at least know and Slade wanted to leave her as is. She had felt better when she told Shado. It lifted a burden from her shoulders but she couldn’t lie and say that it was gone completely. There was only one option. She had to know but he wasn’t going to tell her even if she asked. And Shado didn’t know because she wasn’t there. She dropped the food and gear and emptied her mind. Letting her legs guide her to where, deep down, she knew she would find answers. She ran and, in the distance behind her, she could hear them calling out to her. 

Slade had always prided himself on reaching new heights. Now? He really wished he hadn’t reached nuclear-level stupid. Neither he nor Shado had known that Olivia was back or that she had been listening in on them. As he watched her form disappear into the black forest he was filled with a sense of dread. She wasn’t safe out there. Not at night. She never went out at night if she could help it. He quickly grabbed his swords, strapping them on while running, with Shado quick on his heels. They were much slower at following her. Finding her trail with the flashlight, then clicking it off and running some distance, and finding the trail again. the thick clouds overhead blocking out the moon. 

He wanted to call out to her again, but they had no way of knowing who was around or even if she’d hear them. She hadn’t seemed to when they noticed her running off. He wondered if, maybe, she would go to the cave she had shared with Yao Fei. She had found it when she wasn’t consciously aware of its location. It was a start, their only start and it was much better than moving around blindly in the dark. They found the cave at dawn the next day, even with their pace it took time to move safely. Shado moved to look around outside and he went in. The cave looked lived in but not at all recently. He heard Shado call out to him and he quickly left the cave, finding Shado on a small cliff that overlooked the ocean. There, a little ways down and to the left was Olivia. Kneeling next to an elongated pile of rocks with an off-kilter cross at one end. As they approached, he read the name on the thick cross board.

_Robert Queen._

She was just staring at it, her eyes clear of a mental haze but glassy with tears. He put a hand   
on her shoulder, she didn’t even flinch, and could feel through his gloves how icy her skin felt. She didn’t look at him or Shado. It was almost like she hadn’t noticed them but he knew that she had by the way her muscles relaxed at his touch. He crouched down beside her, blood draining from his face as he saw the front of her. Her hands, up to the elbow, were stained crimson. There was sticky wet all over her. In her hair and on her face. A knife gripped tight in her hands. The blade he had given her as a present when she had finally landed a blow on him during training. 

“Liv? Baby, look at me.” And she did, or rather, looked right through him. 

“I remember.” This is his worst nightmare come true yet he couldn’t help but be in awe of her. Her fingers were locked so tightly on the hilt of the weapon, keeping them from tapping her thigh. Forcing herself to confront what was in front of her. It really didn’t stop the sadness that punched his gut and squeezed his heart. He really wished she didn’t remember being caught by Fyers the second time. She shouldn’t have to relive that kind of brutality. In his mind, what Fyers had done was the worst sort of thing anyone could do to another. And Slade had hit some pretty low blows in his time. 

“Talk to me, love. What happened.” 

“I remember my dad, what he did. How I got here. Yao Fei. I remember.” He used his thumb to brush away the tear that escaped. 

“What about Fyers? Do you remember what happened with him?” he wasn’t a religious man but he sure as fuck was praying she said no right now. 

“Covered faces… pain… screaming… someone was screaming…”

“Slade…” Shado choked. 

“I feel better now. More whole.” Slade couldn’t help the smile on his face. He kissed her, full and forceful. 

“That’s good, love. Very good.” He got up and went to Shado’s side. His eyes tracking as she pointed to the jagged rocks down below them. There was a fresh corpse there, one of Fyers men. It was a very recent kill. The body was mutilated beyond recognition and it wasn’t from the long fall. He looked back at Olivia who looked him square in the eye. 

“I’m still not sorry.” She said. He launched himself at her, holding her tightly. Shado joined. He wasn’t sure who was shaking more out of the three of them. 

They got back to the plane and split apart for a moment. Slade began cleaning and cooking the rabbits and Shado helped Olivia get clean. When both were done, they all sat together to eat. No one saying anything. What was there to say? The moment each of them finished, Olivia wrapped herself around the two of them. He drew in her scent in a great pull of his lungs. Reveling in the feeling of her, safe and sound. With him. Always with him. He wasn’t sure if he could go through with any plan that had her on her own. He couldn’t bear the thought of her alone.

“Please, no more fighting.” She whispered. So that’s why she did it. She ran off to force herself to remember so they would stop arguing about it. 

“Promise. We won’t fight.” Shado told her. They fell asleep that way. Holding on to one   
another for dear life. Their little family once more united.

Days later, Slade had noticed a change in Olivia. She was much more like she had been when they first met and the ten days thereafter. She was happier. Lighter. More jovial and less sarcastic. He liked this change. Her training intensified. Holding her own against both Slade and Shado for a fair amount of time. She did a majority of the hunting, getting better with the bow every day. Still, no matter how good she got, he feared for her. She still apologized to the animals she killed and ate; only, now she meant it. He didn’t think she would have a problem taking out Fyers or his men. He surmised that when they had attacked her, she started tapping. Blocking it out before it even happened. She was okay with killing them because a primal part of her understood what happened. And it wanted vengeance. Both he and Shado vowed that she would have it no matter what or how long it took. Because Olivia deserved it. His lover and Shado’s little sister deserved that and so much more and they would provide it for her. 

Shado let out a shout of happiness that drew his attention. He and Liv looked to see Yao Fei walk into the plane. Shado gave him a hug, the relief she felt was palpable in the air and Liv moved to embrace the man as well. Slade growled at the man, mildly happy that he looked down in shame from Liv’s bright smile. His spine tingled in warning. As did Shado’s apparently as she release him with a look of confusion. He took Liv’s hand and brought her behind him. Something wasn’t right.

“How did you escape?” 

“I didn’t.” at Yao Fei’s words, Fyers men barged in from all sides. Guns up and at the ready. 

“You son of a bitch.” He hissed and moved to kill him. He had done enough to Olivia already. This was just the very last straw Slade would allow. Someone hit him in the head with a gun and he went down. Yao Fei and the goons brought them to where the missile launcher was. 

All three of them bound with knots that grew tighter the more they struggled. Olivia looked at one man in front of the radio, a look of absolute fury on her face. The fact that Fyers was going to fire bomb the whole forest to get rid of them did nothing to abate Slade’s anger. If he had anything to say about it, this would be the last time Yao Fei ever made Liv lose her smile. Fyers walked into the tent as the man on the radio spoke with the pilot of a commercial airliner. Telling it to adjust their course due to turbulence. 

“It won’t be landing, Miss Queen. We are going to destroy it.” 

“Why? Their innocent!” she hissed. 

“Perhaps they are. When the New York stock exchange opened after 9/11 the DOW dropped over six hundred points. Can you imagine what will happen to China, the second largest economy, if air traffic is suspended?” 

“It’d destabilize the whole country.” Slade breathed. Utter horror and disgust for Fyers   
bleeding through. 

“It’s what my employers want. We have enough explosive to down any air craft approaching the mainland. Especially, if a rogue element of China’s own military takes responsibility.” 

“I won’t do it.” Yao Fei said. Fyers just smiled at him. 

“It seems my first warning wasn’t enough. Allow me to refresh your memory.” 

Fyers then punched Liv in the face, shot Slade in the leg, and Shado in the shoulder. Slade was going to kill that sorry excuse for a merc. And he was going to relish it. Then he was going to do the same to Yao Fei, who ran to Shado’s side and gave her his sole attention. Yao Fei told Fyers he’d do it, to spare those he cared about. When Fyers turned his back, Yao Fei slipped something to Liv. As Yao Fei stood in front of the camera before them, they worked to cut the bindings that held them. When Yao Fei had finished taking the blame for the plane that was about to be destroyed, Fyers drew his gun and shot him in the head. For as long as Slade lived, he would never forget the twin looks of shock and heartbreak Shado and Liv had on. Nor would he be able to get the screams they gave out of his ears.


	10. Episode 10: Welcome to the Neighborhood

Olivia wasn’t sure what she had just witnessed. No, that wasn’t true. She knew but didn’t want to accept it. Her hands worked double time to cut the binding on her wrists if only to free herself so she could start tapping her thigh so she could run far, far away from here. As her hands worked she just stared at Yao Fei’s body. There were no tears for him. While she could understand him going to Shado first, she had been shot after all, it still stung. But that wasn’t the reason she wasn’t crying now. In truth, she didn’t know why. Maybe it was because she was in shock. She felt the knife slice her fingers but she barely felt it. When the rope gave way and her hands were free she locked her arms. She wasn’t going to run away this time. Nor any other time. 

She launched herself at Fyers and pushed him out of the way, stabbing the radioman between the ribs. Fyers could wait. Or perhaps not as Slade slammed his shoulder into the madman. Her stabbing quota fulfilled for the moment, she turned cut Shado loose. The fighting became chaos. She wasn’t sure who her opponent was, she just struck out at whatever black dressed goon was closest to her. The only thing she was sure of, in her blind rage, was that she was getting her ass kicked. She wasn’t in control of her body or its movements. Though she was aware of someone choking the life out of her. Panic returned color to her red vision, the oppressive weight of a male on top of her. Shado ripped the weight from her and bones were snapped, but she really didn’t care what or on who. 

_She had to get her hands on Fyers._

He was the cause of all her misery and he was going to pay for it. She ran out of the tent and flinched at the sound of a missile being shot out. She ran for the missile launcher only to be shot at. She fell back behind a stack of crates and covered her head. If she got to the circuit board she could divert the missile before it hit that plane. Out of the tent came Slade with a machine gun. Firing blindly with a war cry at those who had fired at her. He yelled at her to go and she did while he laid down cover for her. She climbed up the launcher and to the hatch that led to the guts and brains of its computer system. Shado yelled at her over the loud noise, they needed to reprogram the launcher. Okay, just because she knew how to half-ass fix a busted radio did not mean she graduated from MIT in hacking! 

She shouted a warning to Shado. Who slammed the attacker coming up behind her into the bulky metal that held the flying explosives. Giving a roundhouse kick to his chin to send him flying off the launcher. Then she shot the driver of it and the damn hunk of junk started moving forward. Shado called for her to finish as she grabbed the goon and pushed them off of the moving death trap. She made her way to the computer system, fighting with the last goon alive. She kicked him away when he punched her ribs. The crack she heard from them made her sure they were broken. She tossed him off with strength she should have had and tried to get the computer to do as she wanted. She plugged the chip in and watched as the monitor blinked and told her that it accepted the new target. She looked up at the plane and watched as the missile turned and came barreling towards her. She stopped the launcher and jumped down. Watching with satisfaction as the missile landed dead center of Fyers camp. 

“Shado?! Slade?!” she called as she wandered around the decimated camp and dead bodies everywhere. The stench of death and burned skin stuck in her nose. There was no sign of either of them. She kicked open a crate and picked up her bow. She notched an arrow as she heard a chuckle. Slade turned his head from around another stack of smoldering crates to look at her. She dropped the bow and raced to his side. Pulling him into a bear hug as her worries disappeared slightly. 

“Should have figured. You couldn’t save the day without making a mess, baby.” She kissed him for all she was worth. He was safe. Alive and safe and still with her. 

“Is Shado nearby?” she asked. He looked confused.

“She wasn’t with you?” blood drained from her face.

“Actually, she’s with me.” That voice… she turned and picked up the bow and arrow, Slade by her side. Fyers held Shado against him, a gun to her head.

“Let her go! It’s over Fyers.” Slade dropped to his knees, adrenaline subsiding and causing his leg wound to become too much. She drew back the string and took aim.

 _If she was even a hair off her mark…_ she shook herself mentally. Letting her mind go blank and opening herself up to everything around her. 

“Amazing. A two year operation because a two-bit whore washed up here.” Both Slade and Shado growled at his choice of words. 

“Let. Her. Go.” She said through her teeth. 

“And now look at you. A killer. A murderer.” She knew he was right. She wasn’t fighting it and she wasn’t making excuses. 

“I can call a rescue ship and take you home. Tell me, Miss Queen, are you willing to sacrifice your freedom for her?” Shado gave her a slight nod. 

“I would, for my family.” She breathed and let the arrow fly straight through his neck. He let go of Shado and dropped to the ground. It felt good yet not nearly enough. But it was fine. They were safe and Fyers was gone. For good.

A few months later, after their injuries were healed, they settled into a routine. They ate, trained, and laughed together. Without Fyers and the looming threat of death around every corner, the island had become some picturesque paradise. Olivia never missed a shot with bow or gun and now Slade was teaching her how to throw daggers with the same accuracy. They had buried Yao Fei with her father. Currently she was training with the bamboo sticks with Slade while Shado was hunting. She could last for almost an hour before she started making silly mistakes due to overconfidence. He laughed with her when they became locked in a stalemate. She looked up at Shado as she came in with lunch and Slade landed a cheap shot to her chin. He helped her up with a smile.

“Can’t get distracted, baby.” She smile back. He gave her a quick kiss and moved to get water. Shado approached her and checked where she got hit. Feeling a little weird as Shado had to look up at her. 

“You have come far; don’t beat yourself up over it.” 

“Ah no. That is the job for you two.” She chuckled. 

“And we love our job.” Shado said as she kissed her cheek. She blushed. She was sure Shado did it just to get a rise out of her. 

“Not that we wouldn’t trade it for a way off the island.” Slade said. She frowned. She wanted off the island too but was afraid of what would happen when they did. Would they stay together or would they go home? But home for Shado was China, Australia for Slade, and some place called Starling City for her. 

“My first meal here was pheasant. Dad cooked it for me.” Shado scoffed at her.

“He was a horrible cook.” 

“Yeah. He was pretty terrible.” She laughed. A quiet buzzing noise started. Coming from some of the equipment they had managed to salvage from Fyers camp. They kept it as a warning system in case anyone encroached on their safe zone. But it had been five months since she killed Fyers so it wasn’t likely that it was his boss. Shado pulled up the imaging to show three very human forms. 

“Maybe, we should go say hello to our new neighbors?” Slade suggested. She and Slade shared a smile. A cruel grin that held dark promises if these invaders meant harm to their family.   
With their gear in place, Shado taking the bow, they followed the proximity meter. Shado moved to flank them, encountering them was the mission, but a trump card could make or break a fight. Nothing trumped Shado and she felt a pang of jealousy. Shado was perfect. The perfect height, perfect proportions, perfect everything. Perfect for Slade. Shado said something in Chinese and she responded in kind automatically. 

“She’s teaching you Chinese?” Slade asked as they continued moving.

“She’d teach you too if you want.” A gunshot rang out. A cold sweat of panic swept over the both of them. They both called out and ran after her. All they found of her was the green hood their father wore. Following the tracks was easy, these people weren’t trained the way Slade was or the way he was teaching her. They found them after nightfall. The morons staying out in the open. There were three of them, easy pickings for her and Slade. He caught her and kept her at his side when she moved to get Shado.

“Wait. Listen baby. There are a lot of them with guns on her. Wait for my signal?” he whispered. She nodded. She trusted him and if he said wait then she would. They stayed behind the foliage and listened as one with a knife got close, too close, to Shado and asked about graves. When Shado told him she didn’t know, he backhanded her. Slade and her let out low, animalistic growls. He was a dead man! Then he wrenched her head back by the hair and brought the knife to her face. She ran at the man, taking him to the ground. She was going to catch hell for this from Slade later. Slade followed after her and took out the other two as she proceeded to bash the knife wielders face in. 

“Olivia!” Shado shouted as she tried to pry her off the man. Yeah, she came unglued. A year and half on this island. This god forsaken island. Meeting Yao Fei, loving him. The incident when Fyers captured her. Her virginity forcibly taken from her. Yao Fei’s death on her hands. So much fucking blood on her hands. She killed every one of Fyers remaining men with that missile. Didn’t even give them a chance. She bucked Shado off of her and grabbed a rock, continuing to beat the man even though he wasn’t awake.

“Olivia, stop!” that was Slade’s voice, wasn’t it? Something warm and wet hit her face. She brought the rock down again and again, the sickening sound of bones grinding together echoed. She was sobbing. She was so very tired. She rolled off the man, not really seeing him, and lay down on the forest floor. Chest heaving, her body spent. Slade and Shado appeared above her, the red receding from her vision. 

“Liv? Baby, you’re okay. You’re safe.” She wanted to move, to hold them both. Once they were sure she wasn’t going to move or go all Lizzy Borden on them again, they cleared away the bodies. She sat up and stared at the spot where the body used to be. She brought her hands up. Covered in blood. Or was it imaginary? They weren’t even shaking. She could feel eyes on her and knew Slade and Shado were   
looking at her. Worried for her. 

“I got her.” Shado said and sat down by her. She was sure Slade was going through what he had found on the bodies. Shado went for her hands but she pulled them away. She didn’t want Shado to get dirty. To become tainted by her. Shado got up and walked back to Slade. When she came back, she had a rag and some water. Cleaning the blood and dirt from Olivia’s skin. But to her eyes, it was still there.

Slade was afraid. And he didn’t admit that often to himself and never to anyone else. But, right now, he outwardly told Shado he was afraid for Olivia. He had seen war and what it did to people. It made bad men worse and good men bad. And he knew that look in Liv’s eyes as well as he knew his own body. He had it once himself. It was the look of someone who was breaking themselves in half. 

“She’s turning into someone she doesn’t even recognize.” He sighed. How the fuck did he think he could keep her bright and pure in this hellhole? She shied away from Shado, he could only guess why. Shado had killed but only ever in a kill or be killed situation. Never like Olivia just had. She pulled away because she was afraid of hurting Shado. 

“I’ll talk to her.” He walked over to her and kneeled in front of her, taking her hands in his. She didn’t pull or shy away from him. They were two of a kind now. She knew he was a killer and now she was two.

“Sweetheart, come on. Let’s go home.” She looked at him and nodded. Coming back into herself. Shado took point as they walked back. He never let go of her hand. 

They got back to the plane and Shado started a fire as he pulled Liv to sit by it with a bucket of water. She instantly drove her hands into it and started scrubbing. He had Shado approach slowly. Whispering to Liv that it was okay. She was okay and so was Shado and so was he. That she wasn’t going to snap and hurt Shado or him. That she wasn’t going to taint either of them. She brought her hands out and looked at them as if they weren’t a part of her. 

“You saved Shado. She’s okay because of you.”

“I tell myself that. That I killed him because he was gonna kill you. You’re not hurt are you? He didn’t… I-I didn’t-?” 

“No. I’m perfect.”

“I j-just feel like this island is turning me into something… else.” She went back to scrubbing. 

“No island can turn you into something you’re not.” He told her. Fear flashed in her eyes then resignation.

“So I’ve always been a killer?” 

“No. Everyone was a demon inside them. Darkness and a light to balance it out. You needed that darkness then.” Shado took her face in hand.

“Now, it’s time to come back to the light.” Slade finished. 

Olivia then did the one thing he never thought she’d do. She kissed Shado. On the mouth. With her tongue. And Shado kissed back. He watched in rapture as their tongues battled, seeing the appendages move along their cheeks. He made no move to leave. Couldn’t. His ass stayed put but his cock jumped. When they removed their tops, he turned to leave. Two small hands took his wrists and stopped him. Both girls were on their knees in front of him, shirtless. The space in his pants grew small and tight. They palmed him and stroked him through his pants. He groaned at the opposing friction, one hand up as the other went down. 

He gipped their forearms and pulled them up. Kissing Liv, deep and hungry, first since she was his first lover. Shado occupied her mouth with his neck, tender and slow. Liv’s hand made quick work of his chest gear. Shado’s hand roamed around his abs under the shirt. Nails scrapping at him. The sensations were fucking amazing. If he didn’t know them, he wouldn’t have known whose hands were where. Shado’s finger tips were calloused from the bow, Liv’s were softer. His shirt gone, their hands and mouth traveled the expanse of his chest. Moonlight came through the opening in the top of the plane. Casting a silver glow over the girls. 

They went back to each other, touching and fondling. Kissing and nipping. He shifted his erection to relieve the pressure before trapping Liv between himself and Shado. Pressing his cock into her ass, she gasped. Shado took her nipple in her mouth as he bit her ear. She writhed between them, seeking friction to bring her that mind numbing escape from the world. Shado kissed her way down her body, getting rid of her shoes and pants. He palmed her breast and pulled her head around by the hair, using his mouth to swallow her startled cries as Shado placed her mouth on Liv’s clit. It wasn’t that sex was always the answer on Lian Yu; it was just that Liv needed the raw, primal connection that it gave. Minds shut down. Hands and mouths were everywhere until all three were so lost in the sensations and connection that no one knew who started and who ended. They rocked into and licked each other until their climax claimed each of them and they fell into a boneless sleep. 

They stayed in their plane for the next few days for safety reasons, Olivia wasn’t an idiot though. She knew it was so that Slade and Shado had time enough to make relatively sure she wasn’t going to snap a wheel again. But she was fine. The night they shared, and the many nights after, gave her a sort of clarity. She alone controlled the darkness inside her and she had to rely on them to talk her back down when she allowed herself to be lost to it. It was an odd feeling, being vulnerable enough to have someone else to keep her in check. She stayed close to Slade, an instinctual part of her knowing that he could calm her down enough to listen to reason. It was just how they were now. Slade was her rock and kept her anchored and Shado made her brain kick into gear with her words. 

As they walked to where Slade had figured the three men were going, they stayed silent. They didn’t need to talk. Just being near them was enough to keep her steady. She couldn’t help the fear that flashed through her at the thought of losing one or both of them. If they kept her human, she would undoubtedly become a monster without them. They continued following Slade to a small clearing in the forest. The view in front of them exactly like the picture they had taken from the dead bodies, a large boulder in the center and the trees only slightly thicker with time. As Shado and Slade pondered the why of it, she wandered around to the side. Seeing a break in the rock formation covered by mossy tree roots. Slade took out a knife and went in first. 

Inside there were random things, papers and a chest. A long stick of bamboo resting against the wall. A skeleton on the ground but it wasn’t right, it looked human but the shape was all wrong. Instead of a smooth surface, the skull was bulbous. Parts of it bubbled up at different heights and angles. The uniform, or what was left of it, looked military with a red and white patch on the left pocket. A sword lay a few inches away. 

“Whatever happened to them was over sixty years ago.” Slade said as he examined the sword. Japanese Imperial Forces, which meant they had been here since WWII. She knelt down next to another corpse, the skull the same as the last, while Slade and Shado looked around. The corpse in front of her had the same clothes as the others with a necklace. A teardrop shaped stone secured by a leather cord, a strange writing on it that she didn’t recognize. They couldn’t stay here long, whoever sent those men from before might send more. She took the necklace while he grabbed one of the skeletons and went back to the plane. 

“Wonderful, now we have a dead Japanese soldier in our home.” He grumbled. She smiled, liking the idea of this being home. 

“They wanted these bodies, aren’t you curious as to why?” Shado asked as she looked the corpse over. Shado did have a point there.

“I’m more interested in how many there are and where their operating from.” Okay, now he had the point. Though, honestly, she wanted to know why Shado looked so at ease with looking over the dead body like   
she had done it before.

“Back in Xingjian, I was pre-med.” Had she said that out loud?

“Yes. Yes you did.” He chuckled. He tossed a pack at her and she instantly knew the name of the game. Get to high ground to get a better visual. But would Shado be alright without them?

“I’ll be fine here.” Shado said.

“I really need to work on keeping my thoughts inside my head.” He chuckled as he kissed her.

“You truly do, love. You truly do.” 

As they proceeded to climb a mountain, an actual fucking mountain, she had trouble keeping up. Her stamina and strength had improved but this was the first time going to a higher altitude and the thin air was draining her strength. Several times, Slade had to turn around and offer her a hand up. Thankfully he didn’t harp on her about it. He did joke that perhaps they should have her train on the mountain too so she would be better able to defend herself in the differing altitudes. 

“Slade? Can I ask you something?” she asked while she held onto his hand to steady herself on the incline. 

“What’s on your mind, love?” 

“Why haven’t you told me not to get attached to you or Shado?” damn, that came out wrong. “I mean, wouldn’t attachments hinder survival? Cloud judgement?” he was silent as he pondered her question. 

“In most cases, yes. But not this one.” While that did make her feel better, she wanted to know why. 

“You wouldn’t have survived on your own without Yao Fei. You wouldn’t have survived taking the plane without me.” Also very true.

“But I love you and Shado.” 

“Yes, and we love you and that is where clouded judgment comes in. Shado and I will always concern ourselves with your safety above our own. But it isn’t a bad thing. Because we wouldn’t trade it for the world. Not even a way off this island.” He stepped and the ground gave out from under him. His massive body sliding down an impossible steep ravine. She grabbed his hands and shifted her feet. Testing the ground beneath before bracing them for leverage to get him back up. When he was safely away from that precarious ledge they lay on their backs, chests heaving.

“Guess I’ll also consider my safety second to you and Shado.” She laughed. 

When they reached the summit, the both looked through small binoculars to get a view of the surrounding area. There was a brightly colored structure on the opposite shore of their plane. Out in the water, was a boat? Maybe. It was hard to tell at this distance. Explosions sounded out from down below. Looking through the binoculars again, the ship was firing off missiles at the island. But fuck the fire storm. That was a boat! An honest to god boat that could get them home. 

“It’s firing off its location. They must have found the plane.” 

“Shado!” both of them took off back to their home and hoped they got there in time. 

They ran through the clearing their home sat in, explosives landed and sending dirt and heat flying. Slade was hot on her heels, shouting out direction so that they avoided getting hit. Slade screamed her name, the sound muffled by explosions. One happened just behind her and sent her flying through the air. She landed hard, dazed for a moment. She tried to get up and call for her lovers but all she could hear was a ringing in her ears. The plane was burning and so was Slade but she didn’t have any energy. She passed out cold as soon as she saw Slade do the same. When she woke up again she was a cold, hard surface. Colder than nights on the island and just as hard as the plane. It was also wet. Her clothes and hair drinking in the liquid as if it were dying of thirst. She opened her eyes to find herself in a cage. A metal cage among several others, all with people inside. Men walked around with guns, automatics. 

_God, you really do hate me…_ she thought.


	11. Episode 11: Last Chance

As Olivia sat on the meager bed on her cage she plotted. Plotted and waited and watched. Looking for an escape. She wouldn’t last long in the open, not with guns on her and no weapon of her own. A man came into the room, stopping right in front of her cage door. His dark skin shined thinned in the light. His eyes were so dark; they didn’t seem to have any difference between the pupil and iris. He wore cargo pants and walked with authority. But not military. 

“You kill two of my crew.” Ah, so she was on the ship she saw. 

“How many others with you on the island?” like hell she was telling him. 

“What are your weapon capabilities?” seriously? If she hadn’t answered the first question what made him think she was going to answer that? 

“Did you find the graves?” this guy really liked dead bodies, didn’t he? She laughed as she pictured that kind of depravity. Her silence seemed to anger him because he gave her two choices. Tell him and get a quick death, or, don’t tell him, get tortured, and die slow. 

_Mmm… decisions decisions._ She mused. She got up and walked to him, their bodies inches from each other.

“Go to hell.” She hissed as she spat in his face. He drew a gun and shot her right in the stomach. Okay, that definitely hurt. She clutched the wound and began tapping her fingers against her thigh. She controlled the darkness in her so she controlled what she ran from. And she ran from the pain until it went from a roar to a minor blip on her radar. She continued to hold the wound the blood making her grip slip. A small tray of supplies next to her.

“They shot me now they want me to fix it. Can’t the give me a knife and a lighter instead?” fucking assholes. She didn’t know how to use any of that. Why did they do this?

“They make all of us do this.” Said the heavily accented voice next to her. The man had a thick beard, meaning he had been here a long while. He was old, older than Slade. Probably her dad’s age. 

“Supposed to show _prochnost_. Russian for strength.” If that’s what they wanted to know they could have just looked at her scars. He lifted his shirt to show her the scar of his own surgery. All of the others did the same. 

“They’re doing this to see if you survive. Living is not for the weak.” No shit? He should try being on the island with Fyers. She groaned as she reached through the bars, twisting her wound. She drummed her fingers harder. This was going to hurt and she was going to need both hands for this. She looked back at the man. 

“Can I borrow your shirt?” he eyed her but gave it to her anyway. She balled it up and stuck it in her mouth. Taking the pliers in hand, she drove it into the bullet hole. Tightening her teeth on the gag, she screamed. When she pulled the bullet out and pulled the gag away, breathing ragged.

“There. Bullet out. What’s this other shit?” 

“Suture to sew it closed.” She hated needles. Why couldn’t they give her fire?

“Used to doing it that way, are you?” she _really_ needed to work on that.

“Yeah.” She responded weakly. Blood loss is a bitch that was kicking her ass right now. 

“Can’t do it for you but I can talk you through it.” She didn’t want to do it at all but she did. Taking his direction, she used the antiseptic in the syringe to clean the wound and stuck the needle through her skin. Over and over until the wound was closed enough to where she would worry about bleeding out. Shado and Slade would come for her. As soon as they knew how, they would come for her. The head asshole came back. She showed him the bullet she pulled out of her, shiny with blood, and threw it at him. 

“For two years my crew and I have been looking for a grave site. Have you found it?” she pushed herself up from the bed. Eyeing him while she imagined letting her darkness out on him without her lovers there to talk her down. The thought made her smile.

“Were the bodies odd? The bones misshapen?” no point in hiding it, she was a terrible liar anyway. He took her silence as an answer, getting up from the stool he clicked the radio. Telling whoever was on the other side that this was the right island. She lay down again. Determined to pass out to regains some of her lost energy. But really she just closed her eyes and talked to Anatoli, her cage neighbor. He didn’t know how long he had been on the ship. She knew exactly how long she’d been on the island. Eventually, all too soon, the new version of the goon squad came and pulled her from her cage. Anatoli looked at her with pity but it wasn’t needed. Whatever they had planned for her would be a cake walk. Her wound still hurt and she shouted. 

“Your days of screaming are just beginning.” Head asshole said. She just smiled at him. There wasn’t much he could do to her that hadn’t already been done. The two men who held her took her away. They were actually quite gentle with her. Easily understandable since the other prisoners were all male. They threw her into a well-furnished room. Odd, torture usually didn’t come with a plush chair. Pushing herself up, she looked at the man who came in. She had seen that face countless times over the years. She would know it anywhere.

“Sam?” he kicked her right in the bullet wound.

“Prisoners do not speak.” He hissed and in walked another man.

“My name is Ivo. What’s yours?” Same shook his head.

“Thea.” 

“So, how did you come to be on this island, Thea? I assume it wasn’t by choice.” She didn’t want to play damsel in distress but if it got her ass out of the fire, then, what the hell?

“M-My ship sank…I was the only s-s-survivor”

“Well, I am sorry to hear that.” No he wasn’t, there was no emotion in his voice. 

“Did you explore the island much?” she answered as best she could. Sticking to the truth as much as possible and only hiding what she needed too. 

“Only some? You didn’t happen to come across a Japanese Imperial Navy submarine, did you?” no. no, she hadn’t.

He began to explain something she couldn’t make sense of. That during WWII, everyone was trying to create a super weapon. She remembered that much from history. He said that the Japanese had something called Mirakuru, a stem-cell thing that was decades ahead of the times. Wonderful for them, but that didn’t have anything to do with her. The Mirakuru, she assumed, as the serum the Japanese created that caused increased strength and rapid cellular regeneration. They transported their only supply via submarine when it was attacked and ran aground on this chain of islands. Fuck. Now, thanks to her lack of ability to lie, they knew it was this island. Which put Slade and Shado in danger.   
If they were even alive. She thought. And it filled her with anger. She wanted to deny it but Slade was on fire last she saw and so was their home. 

“You killed my family.” She growled and lunged at him. Same stepped in between and easily planted her on her ass. A heavy boot grinding into her wound. The two goons from earlier came and dragged her back to her cell. 

“You know, in Russia, there is Gulag. Almost as bad as this.” Anatoli chuckled. She just sat there, seething. She barely noticed Sam at her cage with a bundle in his arms. She wanted to pain this whole ship with his blood. Sure, he hadn’t killed Shado or Slade but he was a part of the people who did with and that made him just as bad in her book. 

“You should have drowned.” She snarled. He tried to look apologetic but it only pissed her off even more. He spouted nonsense about not having a choice. 

“Fine. You wanna help? I need to warn my family.”

“You said they were dead.” 

“They’re very hard to kill. And if they are alive? You are going to wish you had made sure they were.” She chuckled darkly. The monster in her was awake and thrashing. Moving around her insides like a pit of snakes. 

Later that night, or perhaps the next, Sam came and let her out of the cell. She followed him, turning back to Anatoli and promising she would return for him. Sam brought her to a radio. After Sam turned a few dials he handed her the mic. She groaned as she sat down. This could very well be a trap but she could use this to find out if they were alive and warn them about Ivo. She called to Shado in Chinese, praying for a response. Then she called out to Slade when no one responded.

“Thank god you’re alive!” Shado sighed in relief. When she went to respond, Sam tore the mic away. Well, this still worked for her. Shado would know their position was compromised when she failed to answer. Ivo walked in with the head asshole. Saying that her lovers were a threat until they killed them. Her blood boiled as she lunged at him only to catch a hard fist to her jaw. 

“This one is of no use to us. Let’s see how good you are at removing a bullet from your head.” Head asshole said as he leveled a gun at her. Fuck all she was going to die here. If she was going to die, it   
would be with Slade and Shado by her side. 

“Wait.” Sam said, turning to Ivo. “She could still be useful.”

“She’s right. Once we get rid of the other two, we will need her to lead us to the graves.”

“Sometimes I wonder who gives orders here. You or your little bouzin.” Head asshole was not happy. 

“I will get free. And I will make you beg for death.” She glared at Sam. Pure hatred and malice in her voice. 

“You’re going back to the island, Olivia.” Ivo said as he leaned over her. 

_Shado… Slade… please hurry away from there…_ she prayed. 

The next morning they tied her up and brought her with them to the plane. She screamed for them to run and got socked in the face for her efforts. Ivo’s men opened fire on the hull of the plane. The bullets tearing through it like hot knives through butter. When they were done, one went inside and called out that it was empty. The news brought hope to her. They would regroup and heal and come for her. Ivo set their home to explode but that was okay. They could always find another place to live. Provided they all survived. 

“Now, you, are going to take us to the graves.” Ivo said. One of his mean hauled her up and shoved her. She would take them to the gates of hell if that’s what they wanted, so long as it was far away from her lovers. She brought them to the cave where she had found the bodies. Ivo dropping to his knees at one. Searching the chest cavities of each. Mumbling a where is it. Shouting when he continued to not find it. He jumped up and got in her face. 

“The Hosen, where is it?” like she knew what that was.

“The arrowhead. Every report said it was with these bodies.” Ah, that. Yeah, well, he could go without it. When she remained silent, Ivo took on a furious look. Barking at his men to take her outside and make her show them where Slade and Shado were. Because torture was the way to get her to give them up. The head asshole grabbed her and tossed her like a Frisbee outside. Asking her over and over where they were. She told them she didn’t know. They never made plans for a rendezvous point should the plane be compromised. A blessing as now she could give it away by accident. The asshole but the gun against her hand.

“We have a better suggestion.” Said a female voice.

“Give her to us or die.” Said a gruff male voice. She looked up to see Shado, hood in place and bow drawn, and Slade, gun up and at the ready. Half his face was black. But not because her wore his mask. Her stomach twisted. Had she done that to him? Someone spoke from behind her, but really she didn’t hear the words. She was too busy pleading with Shado and Slade to leave her behind. To run away as fast as they could and save themselves. 

“Give her to us and we’ll leave you alone to look for it.” Shado said calmly. Someone moved and Slade shot them. A snarl on his face as he turned to look at the group again. 

“Anybody else wanna be stupid?” in a second she was free. The beast within her surged and she decked the head asshole. She grabbed Sam and ran to her lovers. Gunshots echoed around, then an explosion. They continued running. When they were far enough away to stop, she wheeled around and drew Sam’s dagger and put it at his throat. Walking the slimy piece of shit back until he hit a tree. 

“Olivia! Don’t!” Shado called. She couldn’t listen. Shado didn’t know what he had done. How he had put them in danger. No one puts them in danger. Not on her watch. 

“Liv, baby, come to me.” Slade rasped. She looked at him briefly. Growling, she grabbed Sam by the hair and slammed his face into her oncoming knee. The sickening crack of bone breaking soothed the beast inside. Just a little. She dropped Sam and went over to Slade, nestling in on his uninjured side and letting his soft strokes on her back put the beast back in its cage. 

“I took the Hosen. The Buddhist inscription reminded me of my father.” 

“Don’t think their interested in Buddhism, love.” She glared at Sam, wishing him dead. To catch fire where he stood like her Slade had. 

“What’s on the other side?” Sam asked. Liv moved to gut him but Slade kept her with him. Nuzzling his nose in her neck. 

“Numbers. Coordinates.” 

“To the Japanese sub that ran aground.” Sam spoke again and the darkness seethed. Shado watched her.

“What did you do?” she asked Sam. He tried to explain that most of what was done to her hadn’t been his doing. That he had only tricked her into revealing their location to Ivo. 

“You put us in danger. Maybe I’ll let her have at you after all.” Slade grinned, sadistic and cruel to match hers. Sam sputtered, trying to reason with them that he knew what Ivo was after. She smirked, because she also knew and told Slade and Shado as much. And Shado, ever the voice of reason, leashed their demons with logic. 

“Still, we could use him.” 

“It will save the human race!” Sam shouted. That had her interest.

“Will it save him?” she asked, because that might be worth keeping the son of a bitch alive. If Slade lived then she could be persuaded to let Sam live. The simple idea that it could was enough to make them move. 

The made their way to the sub, she carried a majority of Slade’s weight. Snarling when Sam ventured in close to help. She was not letting him touch her lover. Not now and not ever. Slade rasped that Ivo would be tracking them but she feared they didn’t have the time to play it safe and take careful steps. After an hour, the pain became too much and Slade asked for rest with tears in his eyes. She could see that Shado wanted to talk to her so, against her better judgment, she left Sam in charge of Slade. 

“Do you believe him?” Shado asked. 

“I just hope that miracle serum is on board.” She ground her teeth. She had to believe. Slade depended on it.

“How do you know him?” her lip curled back as she looked at Sam.

“He was on the boat with me when it went down.” 

“What about the man in the photo? You said you were in love with him.” Shado scoffed. 

“Sam is his brother.” No she wasn’t proud of what had happened. But being guilty didn’t change it. Wouldn’t change it. Slade came forward and put his arm around Shado. They walked ahead and left her   
with Sam. 

“Guess a lot’s happened in the last year.” He said to her. 

“A lot more than I care to admit.” She hissed back and ran to catch up with them. Slade glanced back and shook his head. He would calm Shado down, and then they would all talk and things would go back to normal. And they did. Shado understood that the island had changed her. Made her better in some ways. Horrible in others. A long while later, they found the sub in the middle of a lagoon. She laughed. There was still hope.

“Never been more happy to see a hunk of metal.” He rasped. 

Getting to the sub was a chore, Slade thought, but not as much of one as getting into the dame thing. The pain made his feet unsteady and he wasn’t sure if he would be able to fight off attackers to keep his lovers safe. Structure of the thing was good and that meant it was safe for his girls and the boy-child that was with them. Oh he had every intention of setting Olivia loose on him. Like Olivia, he was angry at the boy who had hurt his Olivia and then put them all in danger. When the time came, he would happily help his love exact revenge. His legs gave out and he slid down to the floor of the sub. Rocking his body to restore some heat to his limbs. 

“He doesn’t have long.” Olivia said, she was panicked. 

“We have to find it now.” Shado agreed. He didn’t like this. He knew he was dying but he didn’t want to leave them. Not yet. He didn’t want to see Olivia’s face twisted in pain at his loss. She was so close to that dark edge now that he was sure his death would push her over. He could hear them moving around and he wanted to call them back. Wanted to be with them up until the last moment. He heard Olivia shout and he reached his hand out. 

_Don’t be upset… come back to me…_

He heard more people banging around; he hoped it was just Liv and Shado turning frantic. Olivia entered his vision and he let out a breath. She was his everything, his guiding star in the dark nights. He loved Shado too but differently. They were a family. They were all he had. Olivia was talking to him but he didn’t listen. He didn’t want her scared voice in his head when he died. His one good eye traced her features then Shado’s. Committing them to memory as the angels he knew they were. 

“Do you hear me, baby? It could save you or kill you.” She said, waving a syringe in front of his face. It had green liquid inside. Shado grabbed his hand and looked deep into his eyes. He held their faces in his hands, though he was quickly losing feeling in both. 

“A chance to be with you… is a chance I’m willing to take.” Olivia hesitated. He grabbed her hand and brought the syringe to his leg. 

“Do it.” And she did. He had a heartbeat, maybe two, and then searing pain flashed through him like wildfire. He tried to bite back a scream, he had been through pain but this made his entire body feel exposed and raw. Like he was burning from the inside out. He didn’t suppress the cries for long. He thrashed and howled, Liv and Shado trying to keep him still. Speaking soothing words through teary eyes that fell on deaf ears. He wanted to hear them. He wanted to stay. Just as it began, the pain ended. 

_I want to stay with you…_ was his last thought before his body gave out and his eyes lipped closed.


	12. Episode 12: Down the Rabbit Hole

_This isn’t happening… it’s not real!_

Olivia just could not comprehend anything around her. There was ringing in her ears and tears running down her cheeks as if they were fleeing for their lives. Sam was above her and Shado and Slade. Shado’s face a study of shock and sorrow. Slade was still where they put him. Propped him up against the side of the submarine but he was all wrong. He was moving or breathing. His eyes stared straight ahead in eternity. Then, everything snapped back into focus. Slammed back into her mind and body. The smell of the dank air, the harsh metal trying to bite her through her pants, and the cold freezing her limbs. She threw her head back in a wail that came from the broken part of her soul that lay in front of her. Dead. She grabbed onto Shado with everything in her and Shado did the same. Ivo and his men broke through the door next to them with guns drawn. But what did it matter? Without Slade, how could they go on living? 

Ivo tossed Sam to them and kneeled down next to Slade. Putting his filthy hands on Slade’s neck. Her sadness gave way to fury. How dare that rat touch him?! He had no right! She moved to tackle him only to be caught in Sam’s strong arms. She wanted them to be Slade’s but there weren’t and she would never know the safety and warmth of them. She bucked and trashed but Sam held fast, the loss draining her more than any fight she had ever had. She didn’t even fight them as they tied their hands behind their back and marched them back into the forest. It was dark, and hard to see but then, she   
hadn’t wanted too. Sam was trying to talk to Ivo but the words were as lost to her as a foreign language. 

“… But she might.” Ivo said and she forced her brain to track the conversation. Sam and Shado were forced to their knees in front of her. Someone pushed her down too or, maybe, she was just that tired.

“Time to choose, Olivia. Who lives and who dies.” Ivo stood behind Sam and Shado, waving the gun back and forth between the two. 

“Pick quickly, because in thirty seconds I will shoot them both.” He aimed the gun at Shado. 

“No! Why? You don’t have to do this. You got what you came for!” a part of her knew that trying to talk her way out of this was only shortening her time before she lost them both.

“Ten seconds.” 

“You fucking psychopath!”

“History will be the judge of that. Five seconds.” He pointed the gun at Sam. “Times up.”

 _No... nononononono!_ She thought and screamed. He stepped on the foot of the man holding her and he let go of her arm. Moving forward, making a beeline for Ivo. He pointed the gun at her and she knew she wasn’t going to survive this. But that was fine. She would be with Slade then. 

Not Shado or Sam, I wouldn’t choose one over the other. If I must make a choice then I choose myself. She thought. And as she had hoped, Ivo shot her. She didn’t feel the impact of the bullet in her flesh or the unforgiving ground when she went down. It was suddenly very hard to breathe so she coughed to clear her voice and spoke.

“I choose to die for them.” Or something to that effect. She wasn’t sure of anything leaving her mouth right now. 

“Commendable, Olivia, but those weren’t the rules.” Ivo said and shot Shado in the head. Her body slumped forward, laying in a way that they faced each other. Blood poured from them both like they were   
sieves, to pool around them and mix. To have her and Shado joined in such a way made her smile. But it didn’t last as darkness consumed her being.

_Wait for us Slade… We’ll be there soon…_

_There was so much pain. If he were dead, then why is he still in agony? Or was this hell?_ Slade didn’t know. 

The only thing he was aware of was his lungs pulling in great gulps of air like it had been days since he last breathed. His eyes flew open and his body bowed off the floor. Like snapping his spine in half would make breathing easier. He looked around but didn’t actually see anything. He felt it. The air was like sandpaper on his skin. The metal beneath him like knifes scratching at him. He dragged a hand over his face, which was a very bad idea because it felt worse than sandpaper. More like steel wool. Thick fog in his brain and a mound of fuzz on his tongue. In a series of flashes, everything came back to him. Shado and Olivia. The plane. The burns. 

“Shado… Olivia…” where were they? They wouldn’t leave him here, even if he were dead. The sinking feeling in his stomach turned into an anvil on his intestines.

“Shado! Liv!” he got up and hauled ass out of the sub and into the forest. Who the hell knew where he was going but he had to find them. He needed his girls. Needed them safe with him. Only he could keep them safe. They belonged to him! 

He felt the impact of his boots hitting the ground. Wind whistling in his ears at the speed. He came to the group that held his girls, both were on the ground. Blood roared in his veins in time with the roar of the demon within him. He picked up one of the guys and threw him into the tree. The man’s spine cracking on impact. He grabbed the gun of the second before he could point it and kicked him in the side. Sending him flying farther than he probably should have. He still had the gun in his hands but who the hell cared? These men hurt his lovers. He was going to tear them limb from limb and he wasn’t going to need machinery to do it. So he snapped the rifle in half as if it were little more than a toothpick. Ivo and another ran, one rushing him and catching him on the jaw. Felt like a bug landing on him so he punched the man in the chest. His fist sinking into the bone and flesh like wet paper. He moved to Shado first. She wasn’t moving.

“No…” he picked her up and cradled her body to his. Freeing her hands, he laid her body down gently. Placing one hand over the other on her stomach, before he moved to Olivia. There was blood on her chest, still wet and growing. There was a pulse, faint but steady and growing weaker. He put pressure on her wound, pulling back when he felt the bones begin to brake. He checked his pockets, thanking god that he still had the small med-kit Shado insisted they all carry. He had to hurry or he would lose them both. He had the boy put pressure on the wound while he got up and started a fire and placed the metal tube in the flames. The bullet was a through-and-through. When the tube was glowing hot, he pulled it out of the fire and into Liv’s wound. She didn’t even scream. She had lost too much blood. With the wound sealed she would lose anymore and the danger to her life had passed for a moment.

“Why?” he snarled at the boy. This was his fault. It was all his fault!

“Ivo just shot her. H-he didn’t say why.” The boy sniveled. He curled his lip in disgust. He picked Liv up, carefully so he didn’t hurt her worse. 

“Ivo is going to pay for this.”

Olivia was out for days after and he worried he hadn’t gotten there in time. A part of him wished she would wake up. The boy hadn’t been very forthcoming with information so he had no idea what Liv had seen. He didn’t want to be the one to tell her that Shado was gone. He had buried Shado next to where they had placed Yao Fei and moved Robert Queen to earlier and sat in the cave Yao Fei had used looking at Liv and watching the boy for any signs of unfriendly movement. Liv groaned and fluttered her eyes open, he sat up straighter. 

“No… no… no…” she sobbed. She tried to push the boy away from her.

“I was supposed to die. Why Sam? I was going to be with them… Why?!” now he understood. Slade had looked dead to them, Ivo then shot Shado and Liv did something stupid to get herself shot so that she could die and be with them. He moved the boy away and made her look at him. He face then softened.

“I’m here, love. I’m here.” He said as he stroked her face.

“I am dead… oh Slade… is this heaven? Where is Shado? Isn’t she waiting for us?” no, she wasn’t and he didn’t want to tell her that. 

“No baby. You’re alive and so am I.” 

“Then… it was just a bad dream… she’ll be back soon…” his chest ached. He looped one arm around her shoulders and one under her knees and hefted her up. She was light. Too light. He’d need to fix that. He brought her outside, her eyes squinting in the light, and brought her to Shado’s grave. When she read the wood that marked who was who she started shaking. Several versions of _no_ and _this can’t be_ flying from her mouth. Her hands began to twitch and he set her down so he could hold them. 

“It was supposed to be me. Only me!” she cried. He wrapped her in his arms, keeping her in the here and now and not letting her run from it. 

“She always said you wouldn’t die here.” He whispered into her hair.

“She never said that about herself.” She sniffed. God, what he wouldn’t give to change this for her. After some time, when both were drenched in rain and sweat and tears, he handed her the green hood Shado always wore. She held it tight to her chest, as if she’d lose it if she let go. She pushed herself from his arms, standing as she kissed the cloth. She turned to him, the fire in her eyes like the fury of hell. 

“They will die.” She hissed.

“Slowly.” He agreed as he stood. A cruel smile sliced her face open and he matched it. 

“Oh, so painfully.” They said together. He didn’t cage the monster inside him and she didn’t either. Without Shado, there was no one around to keep their demons leashed to heel. He didn’t ask any questions about how Shado died. He knew how it happened and all that mattered was that they got their vengeance. 

They walked back to the plane, hoping that enough of their gear survived the bombs to make their siege of the ship easy. Slade walked like a man on a mission, Olivia lagged behind because her wound had not yet healed. She didn’t complain though. How could she when Ivo was still alive and kicking. She looked at Slade, something was off about him but she chalked it up to the anger that boiled his blood. Sam was behind them, lagging far behind. They didn’t hide what they were doing or what they had planned but Sam had other ideas.

“I don’t care if you have Mirakuru. You can’t take them all. Either of you. The only safe play is to wait him out.” Slade stalked close.

“Of course you would say that. You were working for him. Probably still are.” She jumped in between them. Slade had a point. Her time on the island changed her so Sam’s time with Ivo must have done the same. 

“Hey, hey! Baby, take it easy. If he was then why is he here?” 

“Out of my way, Liv.” 

“Like hell, Slade. Until he proves himself our enemy his is our ally.” She hissed at him. He grabbed her by the throat and lifted her like it was nothing. She couldn’t breathe. She needed air.

“I said… get out of my way.” Her feet weren’t on the ground. Didn’t even brush it with her toes. From the corner of her eye, she saw Sam take a thick branch and whack Slade with it. Slade dropped her and she coughed. He looked at Sam then at her as she rolled onto her back and tried to be about the vertical. 

“I’m sorry. Oh, baby, what did I do?” He looked horrified and slid down the trunk of a tree. Flexing his hands like he was trying to gain control over them. She moved to his side. 

“It’s okay. I’m okay.” But she knew he wasn’t looking at her, only the red marks that were rapidly darkening into bruises. Sam said something about making camp but she waved him off. 

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, love.” She wormed her way into his lap and the steel cage of his arms.

“I know. It’s the Mirakuru. It’s messing with your head. I know it’s not your fault.” She kissed him and he relaxed a bit. But still held himself locked up. Afraid he was going to snap and hurt her again.   
He still hadn’t fallen asleep even after the moon was made its appearance. He remained against that tree with her head in his lap. She kept her breathing steady, flicking her eyes around behind her lids to fool him into thinking she was asleep. Eventually, as she knew he would, he eased her off of him and walked away once he was sure she was till snoozing. She opened her eyes and got up, following after him. He walked until he was well out of ear shot of Sam and then stopped. She did so as well. He stood there and then cocked his head to call over his shoulder.

“I know you’re there, Liv.” His voice was raspy, just like it always was. She came out from behind the tree she duck behind and stood in front of him. He would meet her gaze. 

“Why’d you leave?” he shuffled his feet. Like he was a school boy afraid of being reprimanded. 

“S’not safe.” Her stomach clenched. He was still upset about attacking her earlier. She got close to him and forced his chin up. She knew where his gaze zeroed in on. 

“No. Look at _me_.” When he did she kissed him. “Listen to me, Slade. This wasn’t you. I know you would never hurt me.” 

“But I did! That was me. I did that to you.” She decked him. His head hardly moved.

“Fucking hear me, Slade Wilson! You think one instance that wasn’t your fault is enough to have me run? Fucking idiot!” she hit him on the other side of his face. She had meant to try and calm him, she truly had. The beasts inside of them wanted out. Wanted to fight. To kill. She gave a vicious kick to his side. He grabbed her collar and smacked her against a tree.

“I could have killed you!” he snarled and she snarled right back at him. 

“I dare you to fucking try.” She chuckled darkly. 

One minute they were snarling and growling at each other, lurching to take chunks out of the other. The next, their mouths were sealed together. All tongue and teeth like the first time they were together. Fingers clawed at clothes and flesh, freeing skin where they wanted. She drew blood with her nails on his shoulders as he bit down on her breast. They were so close, their arousal so heady she could smell it. She needed off this fucking tree. Needed to touch him more than this position allowed. She back-handed him hard, the hit dazing him enough for her to plant her feet on the tree behind her and push. They went tumbling to the ground. They rolled together until they broke apart. Standing, they faced each other. His mouth was bleeding from her blow as was her neck and breasts from his bites. The lunged at each other and kissed, hard and rough. She tasted his blood and he bit her tongue to taste hers. The mix was intoxicating, causing a euphoric laugh to bubble up her chest. Their clothes were gone, lying next to them in a mound of partial shreds. 

“Mine… all fucking mine…” he growled. 

“Yours. Always yours.” She didn’t know why she said what she did next. “Tell me. What will we do to Ivo?” he laughed and she could feel their bloodlust surging. 

“I’m gonna kill ‘em all.” 

“ _We_.” She raked her nails down his bare chest. His chest rumbled in satisfaction.

“We will kill every one of his men. Save him for last.” She rolled him until she was on top of his waist. Impaling herself hard on his engorged length. She started a hard rhythm, feeling him reach all the way up to her womb. He sat up to lick the blood trails from her chest. 

“More… tell me more…” she moaned. He took her hips in his hands and pulled her down harder. The pain jolting through her and making her body come alive. 

“Make him watch… so he can see what’s coming for him… keep him alive for days while we have our fun.” She screamed as she came, her sex milking him for all she was worth. 

“That’s it, baby… so fucking good…” he flipped them so she was beneath him, continuing that harsh pace. 

“You. Are. Mine.” She growled and bit him. 

“Always yours. Body. Soul. My fucking life. And you are mine!” he snapped back as he pulled her hair to pry her teeth from him. Several strands gave way and popped free. She let out a keening cry with his blood on her lips as she came again. This time he followed, his cock kicking deep inside. 

They lay like that for a while, breathing raggedly as they laughed. They were so far gone from normal or even sane. This island robbed them of that. But it left something in exchange. A madness that left them fearless. Gave them the strength to take what they wanted. He got up and helped her stand, steadying her when her legs buckled. She could feel the evidence of their union running down her leg. The white and clear tinted red. They got dressed, as dress as they could. His clothes were mostly unscathed, the arms the only things missing. Her clothes not so much. Her tank top was ripped in half, the over shirt missing every button. Her cargo pants were now cargo shorts. She tied the shirt in place like some model doing a farmer scene, slinking into his side when she was done as they walked back. As they drew closer, Sam was awake and listening to the radio as Ivo spoke.

“… Alive for me to indulge my scientific curiosity.” She narrowed her eyes and stopped. Crouching down with Slade so they could listen. 

“Ivo?” 

“Sam… it’s good to hear your voice. Are you alone?” 

“Do you even care? You were going to shoot me.” Sam scoffed.

“No. I swear. You were never in danger. I would never hurt you.”

“Her name was Shado.” Sam hissed into the radio.

“And I will remember what I did and her name for the rest of my life.” 

_Which might be ending sooner than you think asshole._ She thought.

“Sam, I know you think the ship rescued you when you were adrift but you rescued me. And that darkness is threatening me again. I need you, baby.” She ground her teeth. 

“You saved me. And when you let me into your work I thought I was a part of something bigger. Something wonderful.”

“You are Sam. You are.”

“No. I just didn’t want to see what you were doing. The monster you were becoming.” Well, it seems as if Sam is off their hit list. He turned off the radio as Ivo started ranting about the torture he was going to do to them.


	13. Episode 13: Truth is Relative

Now that Sam had proven, to some degree, that he was loyal to Slade and Olivia they sat down and talked tactics. Olivia wanted Slade to come out on the other side and he wanted the same for her. The first idea they had was to use the missile launcher on the boat. But she put the kibosh on that. Not only did it screw with their way off the island but there were many innocent people onboard like Anatoli. She wanted blood red revenge but she was still in control enough to think of others. Toeing that precarious line between her light and her darkness. Slade agreed after a moment. Well a moment after he stuck a gun in her face and went through another bloody romp in the forest and thirty minutes of cuddle time so he could get his sanity back. 

They did agree that they need to take the freighter but the how was proving difficult. According to Sam, Ivo had no less than eight men on deck to shoot anyone who tried to swim to it. She joked that they could build a raft, which they took seriously and asked if she was an idiot. When she heard an airplane pass over head, they all took off running after it. Screaming and waving their arms in an attempt to flag it down. Which was presently shot out of the sky and they all had to duck for cover to avoid the flaming metal coming right for them. The pilot survived, but not for long. Sam gave up then, fully expecting and waiting to die. But there was a parachute in the plane. They found their way in. 

For days after they trained. She would run through the forest with the bow and take shot after shot at targets Slade had set up for her. Some in blind spots that she had to twist and run backwards for a few steps to really take aim. Then it was push-ups and pull-ups and close combat with Slade which really fucking hurt. That miracle serum was no joke. When she took a break, she laughed as Sam got his ass handed to him by Slade. Repeatedly. Every day she got better, her arrows a little more dead center. 

“Shado would be proud.” Slade said as he handed her the arrow. Her chest heaved as she tried to cool down from the latest run. 

“Thanks, baby, but those trees don’t move or shoot back.” He smiled at her and kissed her cheek. He had been so gentle lately, like he was before the serum. His only response was for her to shoot first.   
Even with the parachute getting one of them inside the ship there was still the problem of the eight men on deck. She was pretty sure she could pick them off from her higher position. The light of day would blind them and make them shoot without actually aiming, but it was a large gamble. The other problem was that the men were spread out; three on either side of the deck and two in the bridge. Not to mention the GP-25 grenade launchers they carried. Advantage? They didn’t have night vision according to Sam. One thing that kept nagging at her was what to do with the Mirakuru serum. If this attack went south, there were very few places they could hide the remaining syringes where Ivo wouldn’t find them. Slade and Sam were in agreement, the best bet was to destroy what was left. Which was how she ended up with Sam watching the crate burn. 

“We need to talk about tomorrow.” He sighed. “About what to do with Anthony.” 

“What do you mean?”

“Slade wants to kill him.” 

“And?” she quirked a brow. What would be so bad about that?

“I know Ivo, you don’t. He will turn this around and make Slade believe that Shado died because you tried to save me.”

“Even if Ivo tried, Slade wouldn’t believe it.” 

“Ollie, Slade has the Mirakuru in him. He’s unstable. There is no telling what he will and won’t believe.” 

That just wasn’t true. Slade saw her and Shado, tended to her bullet wound. The words of a man looking to turn vengeance away from him couldn’t be trusted. Slade knew that. So then why was she counting her arrows again? Testing their sharpness again? When Slade tapped a knife against a bottle she shook her head to clear it. Yes, whiskey was the perfect solution. She got up slowly, trying to keep her thoughts marshaled on the here and now. They each raised a glass to different things. Sam to taking the freighter, her to getting off the island, Slade to Shado. She curled into his side and lifted her cup higher to Shado. She did make Sam promise to tell her mom and sister that she changed. That she wasn’t the same stupid kid who got on the boat. He promised and asked that if he died to tell his family he died on The Gambit. With their vows exchanged, she settled in beside Slade and fell asleep. 

She woke the next morning to Slade’s hand on her shoulder. She swallowed down the bile from the nightmare she had. There would be time enough for regrets later. Now was the time for war. She put on Shado’s hood and grabbed her bow and quiver, they all set off to the coast that Ivo had his freighter. Step one of the plan was to get on board. So, the idea was now to signal Ivo and get him to take her on board. Sure enough, Ivo had seen their bonfire and sent men to retrieve them but she was the only one they were going to get. 

“You know, the first time we tried to escape, it was as strangers. But now it’s as lovers.” She smiled and kissed him, warm and long.

“True, but I am still strange.” He laughed and let her go. 

It was easy to get caught, one well timed trip and taking a hit to the jaw was all it took and she was back on the boat. They tossed her in a cage next to a slip of a man with glasses. Playing with a rat, she had to admit it was cute. The rat. Not the Reverend Thomas Flynn. God must be really bored today. She growled at the man in the cell over who bad mouthed Sam. Before long, Ivo’s goons came for her and everyone in the other cells banged on the bars in rhythm. Anatoli whispering prochnost to her. They brought her to Ivo and strapped her in a chair like you’d find in a dentist’s office. 

“Miss Queen, welcome back.” Why did the bad guys always call her that? Made her skin crawl. Predictably, he started asking where Slade and Sam were. To which she responded with a version of “go to hell.” Probably not the best choice of words. He cut a hole in her sleeve and it was her only good shirt. 

“Ivo… you can torture me all you like. There’s nothing you can do that hasn’t already been done.” He snickered and held up a very large needle. Her eyes focusing more on the size of it rather than what was in it. 

“Sodium pentothal. Better known as Truth Serum.” She started to thrash, she hated needles. Strong hand closed around her shoulders tight enough to make her hiss. He pushed the needle into her skin and pressed the plunger down. Her heart thundered in her ears then slowed to a near stop. Her head and vision swam like she was underwater. There was a light, a bright light, in her eyes. Someone was talking to her, asking her questions and she answered without hesitation. 

“What is your name?”

“Olivia Jonah Queen.”

“Where were you born?”

“Starling City.” The thought of it brought forth the beautiful image she had feared she’d forgotten. 

“Why’d you build a bonfire on the beach?” What kind of question was that? It was obvious wasn’t it?

“So you’d see it.” 

“Was it a trap 

“Not a trap. A… a distraction.” 

“Where are Slade and Sam? Where are they?!” so loud.

“They’re on the freighter. Duh.”

“Where?”

“Engine room.” She mumbled. They brought her back towards her cell. She schooled the smile that wanted to slice her face in half. They were gullible idiots. Sam was right, that nasty junk she ate completely counteracted the truth serum. With Ivo and his men searching the belly of the ship, the deck would be deserted. All according to plan. It was easy to dispatch the goon escorting her. She looked like any drugged up person, no threat at all. She bumped into him, pulling the knife she had hidden in the small of her back and slicing his throat open. She met Slade and Sam on the deck, retrieving her bow and quiver from Sam. Sam went to free the prisoners, Slade went to the engine room to get rid of the remaining men, and she went to find Ivo.

“When you find him, wait for me baby.” He husked and she shivered as the beast started to grin. 

Finding Ivo was like looking for a needle in a haystack. The damn ship was way too damn big. The cell block was in utter chaos. The prisoners were running around haphazardly trying to escape. She watched the last one Sam freed try to kill him. She notched her bow, ready to strike when the Reverend hit him and saved Sam. People were screaming, guns being fired, and explosions rocked the boat. She ran across the deck, tossing the lone crew member overboard after taking one of his grenades. Ivo was in the bridge which was just perfect. A little rat caught in a trap with nowhere to go. She didn’t care who he was talking to, she used the grenade to blow the door. She smiled as it sent him flying. She wished she could hear the crack of bone but the noise was a little too loud. No matter, she and Slade would have their fun soon. He rolled over to look at her and she drew back the string. Ready to plant one in his leg to keep him where she wanted him. 

“Hard, isn’t it? Killing an unarmed man?” 

“Seemed easy for you when you killed Shado.” She growled at him. The beast was banging against the bars of its cage. She had to wait for Slade then she could let it loose. 

“You killed her Olivia! I gave you a choice!”

“And I chose myself to die!”

“Those weren’t the rules. I loaded the bullets and I pulled the trigger but you chose to kill her.”

“I wanted to die. For her and Sam.”

“No… you blame me because you can’t face your own guilt. You killed her.”

“I didn’t want them to get hurt.” Ivo smiled.

“The question is… what will he do?” her stomach dropped. Behind her was Slade. 

“Is it true? Tell me.” He whispered. 

“Slade I-”

“Tell him Olivia. I was angry and wasn’t thinking clearly.” Ivo spoke. 

“Shut up!” she barked

“I gave her a choice. Shado or Sam.”

“No. Don’t listen to him, Slade. He is a monster and will say anything to save his own skin.” 

“Tell him I’m wrong then.” 

“He told me to choose, so I chose to die for them both. He killed our Shado!” 

Slade drew his blade and swung it at her, she stepped back in time to miss losing her intestines but she still felt the rush of air at her mid-section. She was off balance, banged into the console and he kicked her backwards. The air left her in a rush, her arm catching the wheel and turning the ship. He picked her up from the floor by the neck and slammed her into the roof. 

“Slade… please… Ivo…” she gasped.

“He’s dead. As dead as you are.” He snarled at her. The ship hit something and he dropped her as the jolt caused him to fall backwards. The glass on the floor cut into her palms and face. She looked out the front window, watching as prisoners and crew flooded the deck and began a firefight. She ran to the deck and crouched down in a tight spot to keep from getting hit by either side. She fired an arrow at the leg of a man who was about to kill Anatoli. Killing one behind her at his warning. Tumbling across the deck as one in front of her threw a dagger at her and hit him square in the chest. Crouching down with Sam and the Reverend. 

“Ollie, are you okay? Where’s Slade.” Pain stung her chest.

“He didn’t believe me.” 

“We have to get off the ship.” What? No! She might still be able to talk some sense into Slade.

“It’s over, Ollie! It’s over. We can still swim back to shore.” 

“He is right, my friend. We must hurry.” Anatoli agreed. She, Sam, Anatoli, and the Reverend ran to the side of the ship. Slade grabbing her before she could jump and join the others. The punch he gave to   
her eye sent her into darkness but she still felt the bone break. Later, who knew exactly how long, Slade opened her cell door and a man grabbed her out of it. Her legs buckled without the goons support and she fell to the floor in a heap. She did track Ivo coming in, hands raised and talking. Slade held up a handful of needles with green liquid inside them.

“You burned a box of dirt.” Slade and Ivo spoke. Ivo pinned the blame for Shado’s death on her but Slade’s face remained impassive. The only emotion to be read was overwhelming sadness. Slade gave Ivo a gun and told him to show Slade how he killed Shado. The words were whispered, even with the pounding in her skull she could hear them. Ivo pointed the gun at her and she struggled to her feet.

“Slade… this isn’t you… it’s the Mirakuru and you’re sick!” 

“I don’t care.” Where had her Slade gone?

“I was trying to protect them both. I wanted to die for them even though I saw Shado. I didn’t want to accept that she wanted to die. That she was ready to die. I cared for her, you know that!”

“I don’t care.” He said again. “Is that how you did it? Is that how you pointed the gun at her?” Slade twisted around fast and brought his blade down, cutting off Ivo’s hand. He gripped the wrist below his missing appendage and screamed. They took him away. 

“Why all this? Why don’t you just kill me now?” she said, hoping her voice didn’t tremble as much as she thought it did. 

“To kill you now would be a mercy. You cannot die until you have suffered the same way that I have suffered.” He walked to her until they were inches apart. “Until you have known complete despair and you will. I promise.” 

So far, Slade hadn’t delivered on that promise. He just had her chained up in the center of the cell block, shirtless. Every one of his men taking turns beating her until she passed out from pain only to rouse her with frigid water and start again. Slade watched it all. But that was fine. If this was her penance for the lives she took then so be it. Physical abuse she could take. Slade gave the order and she tried once more to get through to him but her words died as her muscles locked up as the Taser was pressed against her back. When she was out cold, he had her brought to Ivo’s private quarters. Hailing Sam with the radio he asked for one of the prisoners, who Sam said wasn’t there. 

“Don’t tell him anything Sam!” 

“One last time. Olivia for Hendrik.” Slade said as one of the goons punched her in the stomach like she was a sand bag. Then hit her side with a Gerry-rigged Taser. Sam begged for him to stop but he didn’t. The Taser hit her again and she was out. 

She woke up again with a gasp then a groan as her broken ribs expanded too far. Her shoulders ached from being strung up by them for so long. But she could take it. The sting on her shoulder blade barely registered but she asked anyway. Slade told her that in Roman times, criminals were branded so that all may know their crimes. But it didn’t feel like a branding iron. He touched it and she hissed, trying to arch her back to move it away from his fingers. 

“Shado wore this tattoo on her back. Now you will wear it for the rest of your life, however short that may be.” The radio clicked with static and Slade spoke into it. They made plans to exchange their prisoners at nightfall. 

When the time came, Slade tossed her at Sam and took the man he needed. Before they left the plane, Slade spoke about the Mirakuru. How it enhanced his senses and that TNT had a very particular smell. He grabbed the hidden explosive from under Hendriks shirt and asked how long before it went off. He disarmed it and drew his gun, aiming it at Sam. She stepped in front of the barrel, looking him right in the eye. While what he had done to her might have killed her love for him it did not make her afraid of him. His hand twitched as if he heard a noise. 

“Death is too good for you. This island shall be your punishment. Your prison for the rest of your days.” He turned around as he left, calling over his shoulder if she had a message for her family because he was paying them a visit when he got the ship working. 

Sam tried to clean the wound on her face; honestly she didn’t even feel it. A few of Yao Fei’s magic herbs and she was back in action. Or, light action. Anatoli came into the plane, glad she was awake and moving, and talking about torturing Ivo. She waited for the beast inside to rear its head. For it to salivate at the notion of vengeance but it remained silent and still. Ivo started to bargain for his life, not that it would do him any good. She turned away to sleep the injuries away but stopped in her tracks. 

“Come again?” she asked.

“I can turn him back. There’s a cure.” The beast picked its head up. Anatoli argued that he was trying to save his own neck but she ignored that. There was hope. A chance to get her Slade back.

“Please, Sam, help me.”

“He can’t save you.” She spat. He moved his shirt aside, showing black patches on his pale skin. Small snakes of the same color reaching outward. 

“No one can save me now. All I ask is for a quick death.” 

“You deserve nothing!” 

“I know. But I am asking anyway.” Sam looked at her, for guidance or askance. It hurt, really hurt, to tell him that it was his call. He nodded without hesitation. Sam hadn’t spent much time on the island. Hadn’t learned to hate and to seek retribution. She was glad for that. Words poured from Ivo like vomit. What did it matter if he couldn’t replicate the damn serum? What she needed was the cure for Slade. He handed Sam a key and told him it was in the safe in his room. On the damn freighter. Sam walked away and picked up a gun. His hands shook as he pointed it at Ivo. 

_This is wrong._ She thought. Sam shouldn’t have to do this. She put her hand on the gun, pushing it down before crouching before Ivo. Placing her hands just where they needed to be. She leaned in close so she could whisper in his ear. 

“You don’t deserve a quick death. Not for all the pain you’ve caused. But that’s okay. See, I don’t know how to do this right. Slowly, so slowly, you will die without the ability to move or speak.” She leaned back and twisted her hands. Watching as the body slumped and the light faded from his eyes. It was a lie, of course; she knew what she was doing. Including how to do it in such a manner as he suffocated with no one the wiser. She looked at Sam and there was mix of fear and shock on his face. But he thanked her all the same.

“So, what do we do now?” Anatoli asked.

“Well… Anyone know how to pilot a Japanese WWII sub?” she asked with a shrug of her shoulders.


	14. Episode 14: Always and Forever

The journey to the sub was trying, having run out of the herbs Yao Fei kept Olivia had to soldier through the pain and heal slowly. While no one knew how to pilot a Japanese sub, Anatoli knew how to pilot a sub. Honestly, how different could it be? God, it smelled the same as it had days before. When they had brought Slade here. When Shado had died. Moving through the dark was easy, her swollen eye had opened some and it was already adjusted. When someone, their name wasn’t important, asked about the blood she found herself talking before she thought better of it. 

“It’s Slade’s. We brought him here. He was dying so we gave him the serum.” 

“Not one of your better ideas.” Anatoli snarked.

“How about my idea to fix the sub?” she bit out. She needed her Slade then and she needed him now. 

“Russian Navy, Olivia. They taught us how to sink Japanese sub not pilot it.” It was a long shot but it was the only play they had. 

“We need to try. If we can get it running then we can get off the island.” She said. And she could get to the cure and get Slade back. Once he had the cure, everything would go back to how it should be. It just had to. 

Anatoli got to work; moving through the sub, flipping switches and pushing buttons. Eventually, the power came on. A mechanic whir echoing through the metal tube as things kicked on and got into gear. He joked about it being like riding a bicycle but she didn’t laugh with him. Her ribs still tender and she couldn’t be in a joking mood until she saved Slade. That was what it all boiled down too. To hell with getting off the island and to hell with everyone else. Slade was all the mattered and she would kill and sacrifice everyone and everything around her to get him back. He pulled two levers and the sub lurched and the engines groaned. 

“We’re stuck.” He said. 

No shit? She thought. He tried turning the wheel but it didn’t budge. They got it working but what good was the hunk of metal if it wasn’t going anywhere? 

“Military Sub means torpedoes, right? Can’t we blast away what’s holding us?” 

“You like your explosions.” Anatoli smiled and grabbed the ships map. Running his finger along the paper and resting it on a depiction that looked like a torpedo. 

“ _Chert voz’mi_.” 

“English, Toli?” she asked.

“Kaiten torpedoes.” The hell did that mean? “Manually operated. Someone needs to steer from inside.” 

“Okay, but then, how do they get away?” Sam asked. She wanted to pat his head. He was still so innocent and she wanted to protect that. Great. Just great. No one was going to volunteer for suicide.

“I’ll do it.” Or maybe they will.

“Peter, you will die.” Sam said. She wanted to smack him. 

“I’m already dead.” He lifted his shirt to show a patch of blackened skin. “Radiation poisoning.” 

_Fan-fucking-tastic!_ God had clearly not abandoned her yet. Or maybe it was Satan. 

“Ivo said that the essence of heroism is to die so that others can live. I held onto that, gave me hope.” Anatoli walked the four of them down to the torpedo bay, walking Peter through how to operate it. She pulled Sam away, no reason for him to see that or even be near it. She handed him a radio and told him to go. If this didn’t work, he needed to be safe. Granted, if it came down to Sam or Slade… well, she wasn’t about to make the same mistake she had with Shado. Sam left, and she walked over to Peter. Did he even know how to work the damn thing?

“I get in, he fires, I steer, you pray.” Guess she said that out loud. She wanted to tell him something comforting. That’s what you did right? She didn’t know why she felt she had too. Maybe her conscience was working overtime to keep her somewhat human. 

“You are brave.” 

“No. You are. You came back to the boat. You saved us.” She shook her head at that. 

“I wanted revenge and to go home. You were the last thing on my mind.” It was harsh but it was the truth. And a dying man deserved the truth.

 _Didn’t they, Ivo?_ The thought of how long he lasted made her want to smile. Peter shook her hand before climbing in. She shut him in and went back to the firing deck. Giving Anatoli the go ahead when he confirmed Sam was out of the blast range. She looked at the periscope. Watching the metal fly through the water like a fish. There was a loud explosion and they were tossed around like rag dolls in a dryer. When they righted, he shouted at her to turn the wheel.

“Which way?!”

“Anyway!” her ribs, her whole body screamed as she tried to turn the decades old wheel. He pulled a lever as she tried to get the wheel moving. When it did she sagged in relief, grabbing the radio to hail Sam.

“Ollie!” came her strangled response. 

_Fuck._

She moved topside. Getting to the shore and running through the forest at record speed. Her shoes eating up the ground as she tried to locate same. In the dirt, all she found as the broken radio. She went back to the sub and tossed the wreck onto a desk. 

“ _Chert_.” The ping of the sonar went off and Anatoli looked at the monitor. The Amazo was on the move. She banged on the wheel mount. 

“We have another torpedo?” 

“ _Da_?” 

“Can you rig it to go straight?” 

“I’m discovering capacity to do many things I never thought I would do.” He shrugged. Fucking perfect. She grabbed a back pack and moved to a different section.

“Can you get us close enough for me to swim to the freighter?” 

“What do you need torpedo for then?”

“If Sam and I aren’t back in an hour… sink it.” She said as she turned to him. He looked away slowly. His face telling her exactly what he thought of that plan. She continued packing while Anatoli did as she asked. She knew this was stupid and was going against every fiber of her being geared towards self-preservation. 

“This is _sumassedshiy_ crazy. You don’t know if he has him.” 

“You’re a good man, Toli. If this is to be goodbye, be safe.” She drew him into a quick hug. Steeling herself to go through with this plan. He said they’d see each other soon but she shook her head.

“One hour, Toli.” She said and climbed the ladder to the surface.

“If we ever see each other again, Olivia, know you have friend for life.” He laughed that he would teach her to speak Russian as she butchered the word for strength. 

Getting onto the ship was easy, getting below deck and into the cell block was even easier. Something was off here but she really didn’t have time to puzzle it out. She quietly got the cell door open and Sam woke up. Whispering her name and holding her like he hadn’t seen her in years. She pulled him down the corridor, telling him the sub was right next to the freighter. That he could swim to it and no one would catch him. 

“I can’t leave yet.”

“Ollie?”

“The cure. Slade needs the cure.” 

“Ollie, no!”

“I have to! We gave him the Mirakuru now I have to make it right. Now go.” She hissed and he had the sense to understand she wasn’t going to leave. He left her with a hug. What she had to do, if she had to do it, needed to be done alone. Because if Slade wasn’t going to listen to reason, then she was going to kill them both. 

The whole sub remained quiet like a ghost town, no one responded to the loud creeks of the doors or the squeak of hinges. Finding Ivo’s room was easy and it made the hair on the back of her neck stand on end. There was something really wrong here but she didn’t have time to dwell on it. She needed to find the cure and find Slade and give him the cure, hopefully, before he knew what hit him. She grabbed Yao Fei and Shado’s bow and quiver, putting them on before moving to the safe Sam had said was hidden with Ivo’s books. The door to the safe was slightly ajar, she opened it and found… nothing. Fucking nothing. That bastard lied. Footsteps echoed to her right and she turned to see two men with guns pointed at her. Slade walking in behind them and holding a syringe filled with blue liquid. 

“What are you looking for Livvy? This?” he rasped. His goons grabbed her and took her bow, well tried to. When one touched it she snarled at him and slugged him. Slade walked over to her and took the bow and the quiver, and she gave it up without a fight. The goons took her and brought her back to the cell block where a man lay on the floor. Dead. Slade picked up the man and checked his vitals, screaming for another when he didn’t find what he was looking for. 

“Slade what are you doing?” 

“Advancing the course of science.” He said as he pulled another Mirakuru filled syringe from his pocket as his goons brought another man from one of the cells. 

“Wait, no! No, Slade please! I know you blame me for Shado’s death. I blame myself too!” and it was true. Had she just done as Ivo asked and chose Shado over Sam, she might still be here. Though there wasn’t much about Ivo’s character that said he would have kept his word about letting two of them go, the chance was there. A chance she had wasted because she didn’t want anyone else close to her to die. Slade got up from the man on the ground and looked behind him, like someone was speaking to him. 

“We are lovers, Slade. You said so yourself! I am begging you, just listen to me baby, please!” his hair was overgrown, like he hadn’t bothered to trim it since being on the Amazo. His eyes were shiny with unshed tears. 

“Think about Shado! She wouldn’t want this.” He continued to look behind him and at her. 

“She’d want us off Lian Yu. She’d want this to end!” he gripped his head with his hands, like he was warring with himself. If his anger fueled his psychosis, as the Mirakuru was known to cause, and that anger carried Shado’s face and voice… this was a battle of wills. One of the goons let her go and she went down. Her knees landing hard but she shook it off. He pulled something out of his pocket and took a gun from the small of his back. Turning, he faced her with his half and half colored mask on and the gun pointed at her. 

“Slade!” she screamed but it was mostly muffled by the explosion coming from behind him. Everyone was knocked off their feet and to the ground. Two more rocked the ship, water spraying in from   
somewhere overhead until it was ankle deep. It was getting deeper by the minute. 

She scrambled to her feet, grappling with a goon with a gun and tossing him aside. Grabbing an arrow from the fallen quiver to stab the second in between the ribs and upwards into his lungs. Or maybe his heart. The one with the gun recovered and rolled over began firing. She dove behind a metal something to evade the hail of bullets. When the pop of gunpowder stopped, she listened to the water slosh around as he ran away. Now it was just her and Slade. They both ran to grab the pack of Mirakuru but she got to it first.

“Give it to me!” he snarled. Holding out his hand like he had done so many other times. Only, in those happy memories he was seeking her hand and not what held it. She threw it with practiced ease into a nearby fire. The water was above their knees, just about to their hips. 

He swung with a left hook, she back stepped and they did it again. The second time sent her off balance; he didn’t give her time to recover it. He kicked her stomach and the blow knocked her off of her feet and into the metal cage behind her. She staggered to her feet, listening to him as he spoke. Sam never made it to the sub; he found him and killed him. They ran at each other, her demon was awake and alive and hungry for blood. The bars that held it were blown apart, burning and twisted into a giant knot. It smiled with absolute glee. 

He jumped at her and brought his fist down; she batted away his punch and pushed down the second coming up from below. This is what he taught her; against a new opponent or one you know is strong, defend until there is a clear opening and take it. Don’t stop until their gone and can’t come after you again. It came when his arms were away from his body, allowing her to drop to her knees and punch his stomach. She wondered if he even felt it. She pushed him back, getting to her feet and giving a side kick to the same spot. He fell to his back, rolling to his feet to catch her as she dove to pin him. He dodged her attacks easy, kicking her in the side when momentum forced her to give him an opening. Then another, her footing slipped and she swallowed sea water and it made her stomach churn. She got up and brought her fist down, he counted and she let fly another hit with her other hand and he caught it. Slamming his fist into her arm and breaking the bone. She shifted back as she panted and cradled it. He jumped, trying to knee her in the face but she blocked but he punched her in the cheek with her arm occupied. She rolled to her feet, staggering and broken.

“You can’t kill me, Livvy.” She hated that. His nickname for her coming out of his mouth with so much venom in it she was sure to die from the sound alone. 

She punched; he blocked and kicked her leg out from under her. He grabbed her by the neck and squeezed, lifting her until her feet didn’t even scrape against the water. She tried to peel his hand off but her hand only had the strength to pull off the mask. Black flowers bloomed in her vision, the mask slipping free of her fingers. She landed a solid blow to his cheek, making him lose his grip just enough for her to drag air into her lungs. The monster was growling in anger. She could hear its bestial rumbled echo in her mind. Slamming her hand into the curve of his elbow once. Twice. But he refused to let go. He let her down, the water frigid on her chest, and punched her in the face. Letting her go to rest on all fours, eyes coming into contact with his mask. He kicked her side again and she screamed as the ribs, which had healed slightly, broke again. He walked around her. She had to get up. She had to get up and fight for her life. She had to protect her stomach from anymore injuries. The last one was a strange thought but something deep in her bones told her that that was most vital. He kicked her stomach again, going foot over head into the water several feet away from her previous position. They ran at each other with a war cry so fierce, it sounded like thunder. An explosion knocked them both off course and face first into the water. The metal creaked and sung as it scraped against itself and crashed into the water. She wobbled to her feet, holding the cage for stability and turned to see him pinned down under the fallen beams. 

“What are you going to do, Livyy? Stick me with the cure?” she held an arrow in one hand and the cure in the other. 

“It doesn’t matter. I’ll keep my promise!” she only stared at him, time slowing before her eyes but his voice remained clear.

“I’ll take away everything and everyone you love!” 

Something inside her broke. It wasn’t a bone but she heard the sickening crunch. It wasn’t an organ but she felt the blood squelch as it flew free. She was in the freighter but her mind coughed up memories of her family and friends. Her little brother and her mom. Tommy and Lucas. Slade was trained the same as Billy. He knew how to hurt people and where to strike to hurt the most. She remembered being caught by Fyers the second time, the pain and the feeling that she wouldn’t survive but she did. She did. She didn’t need him or Yao Fei or anyone anymore. She could survive on her own. The demon grinned in satisfaction; as if it was pleased she had just learned some great truth of life. 

_I don’t need him…_ With a shout, she drove the arrow in her hand into his left eye. He fell back motionless and she stared at his body. Slipping the blue syringe into the pocket of his clothes.

“Always and forever… I am with you, my own heart…” she whispered. An explosion kicked her body back and her world went black. 

She woke up again with sunlight in her face and noise outside. Her wounds were tended to and wrapped tight in gauze. The bed she was on was soft. Too soft and it made her back ache. She rolled off the bed and onto the floor, pushing herself up on unsteady feet. Grabbing everything in reach to keep herself vertical. A man came in and flashed a gun at her, bringing her outside to stand before a small woman. Shorter than her but made taller by the stiletto shoes she wore.

“My name is Amanda Waller, Miss Queen. We have a lot to discuss.” The car door behind her was opened and she was ushered inside without a word or getting a word in edgewise.


	15. Episode 15: Partners

The car ride with Waller was, in a word, unpleasant. The woman set off alarm bells in Olivia’s head. Those alarm bells kept her relatively safe on the island and they would do the same here. She watched and listened to Mrs. Waller while taking in her surroundings and an inventory of her own self. Her wounds were treated but there was no brain fog from medicine so she couldn’t have been out for very long. The people milling around were of Asian descent and by the snippets she could hear, they were speaking in Chinese. Clearly, she was off Lian Yu and on the mainland somewhere. The man next to her wore a similar suit and had his black hair tied back. He said he’d kick her ass if she ran. 

She studied the car; leather seats, Italian by the smell. Older model, one that would be common place still. One that didn’t come with automatic locks nor were they made after-market. She grinned inwardly, the suit might be able to kick her ass, but he’d have to catch her first. Slade taught her to fight, Shado how to shoot the bow, but the island taught her to run and to use her surroundings to hide from pursuers. Deciding to chance it, she opened the door and dove out. Hitting the pavement and rolling to her feet and sprinting away. She heard people shout and tires screech. She didn’t know the terrain personally but she knew how to use it to her advantage. Running into a side street that was thick with people, she hunched down and continued on. Banging into a man and snatching his phone. 

_Password protected. Shit._ She ditched the phone and continued moving, ducking into a computer café. 

_Bingo!_ She hip checked a man out of his seat ad her finger flew across the keyboard. Thankful for the Chinese lessons from Shado, she signed into her email and typed up a message to her mom. A gunshot rang out and the bullet hit the monitor she was working on and people ran out of the shop. The suit who threatened came in and they circled each other for a moment. He struck first, she blocked and he took a cheap shot to her abdomen. He punched her and did a flying roundhouse kick that left her on the floor and seeing stars. 

“I don’t speak Chinese!” she hissed when he started yelling at her. No reason to tip her hand now. 

“I told you, if you try to run, I’ll beat you senseless.” There was something in his eyes she recognized. But she didn’t have time to name it before he pistol whipped her. And so this became the pattern for the next five months. She would slip her detail, attempt to get a message out to her family only to be found and dragged back by Maseo the Suit. It has now been two years and five months since she’d last seen her family. This last attempt landed her in a chair in an abandoned building with Maseo the Suit standing over her and Mrs. Waller giving her the third degree. 

“This makes five attempts?”

“Nine.” She corrected. 

“What we have here… is a failure to reach an understanding.” 

“Oh… go to hell.” She hissed. 

“So this is my reward for saving you from drowning?” yeah, she wondered why they had bothered. But, in the grand scheme of things, what did it really matter?

“That’s need to know.” Damn it. “But I have need of someone with your skills.” Slade was right; people were always in it for themselves. 

“I don’t care. I’m going home and I will _not_ stop trying to escape.” Waller threatened her life. So she invited the threat. True, she didn’t need Slade anymore but that didn’t mean it hurt not being with him. If she couldn’t have them back, then fuck everything else. Even her own family. Sure, she wanted to go home and see them again but she wasn’t going to actively avoid death. 

“We’re going to have to try this another way then.” Waller said and left. Maseo the Suit punching her in the jaw hard enough to knock her out of the chair. She was able to spit out a mouthful of blood before the second hit came and put her under. 

She woke again, on an uncomfortably soft mattress with a woman dabbing her face with a rag. She said something in a language she didn’t recognize. She groaned as she got up, stretching until her spine popped back into alignment. She snapped that she didn’t understand the woman, not the dialect of Chinese. She corrected her, saying it was Japanese. This was different from the room she normally woke up in after an escape attempt so where was she?

“Our home, mine and my husbands.” She really needed to work on keeping her inner thoughts inside. She got up, stiff from that damn mattress and walked around. Finding Maseo the Suit in the kitchen, a bowl of something in his hands. 

“Welcome to my home.” So this was it. This was what the look in his eyes was. Waller was like Fyers, willing to threaten anyone to get what she wanted. She regretted putting Maseo the Suit in this position. Somewhat. Self-preservation was the name of the game. 

“How do I get out of here?” she asked as she looked out the window. She couldn’t look into his eyes. Seeing them would remind her too much of Yao Fei and how he had been put into a similar situation that he hadn’t deserved. A situation she tried to free him from only to get him killed. 

“You can’t leave.”

“Well, try and stop me.” She walked away from him when he walked close. She didn’t want to be responsible for another life. It turned to shit when she was. 

“You know I can.” She was in front of the door; all she had to do was walk out of it before she and the monster inside her tainted this family. “Waller wants you to work for her and she will have you.” 

“Too bad for her. I’d rather die.” 

“She won’t take your life.” She froze. “I am to be responsible for you. Akio.” From somewhere in the apartment, a small boy walked into view. Her heart sank. She hadn’t wanted this. She didn’t want to hurt anyone and yet, here she was. A family, a _child_ , in danger because of her. She was darkness, corrupting everything near her. She clenched her teeth. It was too late. Too late to die and too late to escape and leave them in peace. She looked at Akio, her legs buckling and she went to the floor. 

“What do I need to do?” 

Maseo got her some clothes, cargo pants and a button up. Like she had on the island and a beanie to keep her hair out of her face and hidden. He took her to a roof top with a very long plastic case in his hand. Inside was a series of parts belonging to a rifle which he began to put together but she stopped him. Putting it together with ease the way Slade had taught her. She could keep him from staining himself with more blood. She asked who the target was, not really caring that she was to be the one to take whoever it was out of the picture. She had killed before; it was bone chilling at how easy this was for her now. She set the stand in place and looked through the scope.

“The target will walk ten paces through the garden and arrive at his hotel room. That is your window.” Three people walked through the zone, a woman, a bellhop, and a man in a tan leather jacket. She lined up her shot, ready to fire but he turned around at the last moment and she saw the face of the man she was to kill. 

_Tommy?_

It was him. Tommy. Her best friend Tommy. She didn’t put the gun down, she threw it. Slugging Maseo with a sucker punch as she seethed in anger. Her beast was alive in her veins. How dare he? How dare they target her friend! Screw his wife. Screw his kid. He was a dead man and if that meant they died? So fucking be it. 

“You think it’s a coincidence your friend showed up here?” she didn’t care how or why Tommy was here. She wanted Maseo to die. So what if it was a test? He could flunk her for all she gave a shit. 

“When you logged into your e-mail, it set off an alert. Dead people don’t check their e-mail, Olivia.” So the fuck what?

“Waller needs you and she can’t have a rich kid flashing your picture around Hong Kong.” That abated her anger some. If Tommy was here than he was in danger. She couldn’t have that. She and her demon growled in tandem. 

“You have access to Hong Kong’s criminal database?” she ignored his confusion. “Rapist, murder, pedophile. Don’t care which just get me someone to hit.” Of course, she had no intention of just hitting them. No, her demon demanded bloodshed and so did she, and they were going to get it. 

Later, after her… playdate… she and Maseo the Suit walked around his apartment. Trying to come up with a way to save Tommy from a bullet. Or, rather, she was trying to come up with a way and he was shooting down those ideas. Try to find a body in the morgue? He had a point that she’d have better luck winning the lottery than finding a passible body in Hong Kong. She understood the situation but she was not going to kill Tommy. Not one chance in hell. He had only one way to get her out of doing this and that was someone else doing the deed which she couldn’t allow. That was when she got an idea; one that she was sure would work. 

“Maseo, I need a sedative. Powerful. Injectable. And I need my gear.” 

Which was how, after many questioning looks, she ended up in Tommy’s hotel room. She heard him move about and talking to someone. His father, most likely. Their relationship had been strained ever since his father had run out on him after his mom died when they were kids. He hung up the phone and was turned away from her. In her black clothes, she blended with the shadows of the closet. She approached as she had when she and Slade attacked Fyers came. Silent. The needle sunk into his neck easy and he fell out the instant the drug hit his blood stream. Getting him out of the room and into a different location was difficult but thankfully, Maseo the Suit had agreed to her plan. 

She stalked around behind Tommy, his hands tied tight to opposite chair legs. He woke up and, much as she expected him to, tried to bargain his way out of this. She deepened her voice as she flipped on several lights to blind him. With the brightness of the bulbs and her black clothes, his eyesight wouldn’t focus enough to recognize her. When he realized bargaining wouldn’t work, he tried to threaten and it almost made her laugh. She had done the same thing when she had found herself in a very similar situation.

“You’re Tomas Merlyn. You’ve been looking for Olivia Queen.” 

“H-How do you… how do you know th-that?” 

“I knew somebody would be looking for her. What better what to draw out her rich friend than to make him believe she was still alive?” she chuckled for good measure. “Thought it would be her mother. Her brother, maybe. But the boyfriend? Son of the CEO of Merlyn Global? Jackpot.” The was killing her inside. She wanted to hug him. Crush the life out of him as she held on and never let go but doing so would only get him killed. 

“So Olivia didn’t… she isn’t…” the pain in his voice made her knees quake. She pulled down the bandana from her face so she could get air into her rapidly deflating lungs. 

“Olivia Jonas Queen is dead. Rotting at the bottom of the ocean.” Her voice broke as she poked his shoulder. But she hoped he got the message. Just like she had planned, Maseo had gotten the police uniform and set Tommy free. Hopefully, they were all in the clear. 

When Tommy was back in his hotel room, safe and sound and on his way home, Maseo asked why she screwed up her name. She was Olivia Jonah Queen; she told him that a middle name wasn’t important information so it was fine if she messed it up. He dropped the subject, happy that they had achieved their goal. Her first mission was a success in her book. Even still, she snuck out of Maseo’s house and slipped into Tommy’s room, she shook him awake but put a hand over his mouth so he wouldn’t shout. She left the light off and he tackled her in a hug. She hugged him back and breathed in his scent. 

“Olivia what-?” she put her hand back on his mouth. 

“Listen to me Tommy. I can’t go back. Not yet.” He looked confused.

“Liv, please. Your mom and Theo-” she shook her head.

“I can’t, Tommy. Please understand, I can’t.” 

“Jonas?” he asked.

“Jonas.” He hugged her tight again, promising to keep her secret and to let her mom and brother think it was a dead end. She slipped back into Maseo’s house to find him waiting for her. He was not   
happy. 

“You went to see him? After everything we just did to get him to leave?” she stayed turned away from him. 

“I had to see… make sure I didn’t hurt him.” And that was true. She hurt everyone she came into contact with. Sam. Slade. Shado. Yao Fei. She had hurt them all. Killed them all. 

“I’m sorry, Olivia.” She turned to look at him. The expression on his face made her chest ache. 

“I just… had to make sure…” she said quietly before retreating to her own bed. 

Maseo Yamashiro was a man of many talents and just as many crimes. He had seen the resolve in Olivia’s eyes when she invited her death from Amanda Waller. He had seen the look in her eyes as that resolve to die turned to protection of his family. Even though she hadn’t known them, hadn’t had a reason to care, she remanded herself to working for ARGUS for the sake of his family and because of that he owed her a great debt. He could see it in her eyes that she was warring with herself, she couldn’t kill her friend but she had a stranger. He happened to be a rapist and she had seemed to thoroughly enjoy taking him apart. But she refused to kill an innocent. He stayed in the living room for a long while, about to head to bed when he heard small, pained whimpers coming from Olivia’s room. 

He opened the door quietly and poked his head in. She was asleep on a pile of blankets in the far corner by the bared window. He wondered if that was how she always slept. Her body shook with tremors. Those of one in the midst of a nightmare they were trying to escape from. Waller had given him her medical file but he hadn’t read it. He honestly didn’t want to know the kind of horror she experienced on Lian Yu. 

“I’m sorry… so sorry…” he closed the door and went back to the living room. Pulling her file from the wall safe, he sat down to read it. To say that he was nauseated would be an understatement and he couldn’t fathom how she had survived. There was no mention of a Slade or Sam. No mention of a Shado or Yao Fei either. 

“Sam, Slade, Shado, Yao Fei… I killed them all…” she had said, though unaware she had spoken. Waller gave them a few days before she had intel enough to give them their next assignment so he had time to understand her better. 

A few nights later, Akio had woken him in the middle of the night. Saying that Olivia was asleep on the floor by the open window of her room, soaked to the bone from the downpour of rain they had had all day. After ushering his son back to bed he went to her room. She was, as Akio had told him, asleep on the floor with rain pounding her body. Rain in China during winter was damn near ice cold. She was trembling and moaning with nightmares again. He crouched down beside her, shaking her shoulder to wake her. One second he was upright, the next he was all about the horizontal. She grabbed his wrist in the same speed as the lightning overhead and flipped him onto his back. Moving to sit on his waist with a knife pressed against his throat. A knife that had gone missing from his kitchen days ago. Her hair was plastered to her face, breathing harsh, and eyes wild. 

“Olivia? Liv, it’s me. It’s just me.” He held his hands up defensively. Her eyes widened in realization a fraction of a moment before she scrambled away from him and buried herself in a corner as far from   
him as she could get. 

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I didn’t…” she rambled about not wanting to hurt him. 

“It’s alright, Liv. No harm done.” She shook her head rapidly.

“Don’t… don’t call me by the name he gave me… please…” that word sounded so broken to him. He closed the window and sat down in front of her. For better or worse, right reason or wrong, they were partners and he needed to understand her. 

“He? You mean Slade?” tears fell from her eyes as she nodded. “Was he the father?” 

“Father?” she looked confused. He really wished he hadn’t asked that.

“You were pregnant, Olivia. You miscarried when we found you.” Her tears flowed in earnest now. On a primal level, she must have known she was pregnant. Her medical file stated that many of her injuries had to be gained from someone either aiming for those spots or from her moving to protect another area. On that same level, she must have known she lost it as she avoided Akio and his wife showing him affection like they carried a deadly disease. She shied away from him when he moved closer to give her a hug that she seemed to desperately need. Was it because she didn’t want to hurt him like she had claimed to have done to people she cared about? Or, was it because of the rape she had endured? He turned to leave her alone; thinking that, whatever reason she had to flee from him, she probably wouldn’t want to be near him. She grabbed his wrist, her tiny fingers barely reaching all the way around. He sat back down and let her cry. As long as she wanted, he stayed with her. Murmuring soft and soothing words that he was sure, was making this whole thing worse.


	16. Episode 16: Deal With The Devil

Olivia didn’t speak about that night with Maseo again. In fact, she barely spoke to Maseo at all. It was strictly business as usual. At least, she tried to make it that way. It was hard. Watching the intimate family moments from an outsider’s point of view and each time it happened she couldn’t help but think, _that should be me_. It should be her and Slade and their child and Shado and Yao Fei sharing precious family time. She was reminded, more often than she could bear, of what she had lost. Of what she would never get back.

_What I have destroyed._

It was a reoccurring thought she had that she really didn’t stop trying to have. The pain it brought was good. It was proof that she was alive, or in hell and this was her penance. It further drove home the fact that she didn’t deserve a loving family and safe home. Still, she was attached to the Yamashiro family. It was hard not to be, being in such close quarters and all. Tatsu might still dislike her but that was fine. Akio liked to play with her and Maseo and her enjoyed a partnership like you would see in television. Suffice it to say, Waller was very pleased that she had brought Olivia to heel. Currently, she and Maseo were tailing an older man whom she thought was a terrorist. They spoke through the Bluetooth device in her ear and she asked why Waller wanted this guy dead. 

“Too many questions, Olivia. Follow orders and take out the target.” Maseo knew why she asked so many questions. She needed to know as much about her targets as possible so she could make herself as guilty as possible, even if they deserved it. 

“So… I am the gun she points at people she doesn’t like?” 

“Exactly.” The old man she was following started to move again after getting his ice cream. She followed after, still talking to Maseo about whatever she could think of. 

She followed the old man into another side street; she was beginning to lose him in the sea of people he walked through. As per Maseo’s direction, she stayed at a discreet pace fifteen steps back. She dropped the blade from her sleeve and flipped it around so she held it in a reverse grip. Picking up the pace so she could get within striking range, she closed in on him. She pushed him into an isolated corner, fear tinted the air. Her demon was salivating. She pressed the knife into his heart, looking him in the eyes as she watched the light fade from them. It was the least he deserved. The man she was tailing dropped to the dirty ground, dead. Grabbing the keys he dropped, she hailed her partner.

“Done.” When she got back to the apartment, Maseo was in the kitchen and Tatsu was nowhere to be found. Tatsu really didn’t like her, didn’t she? 

“You’re wrong. She hates you.” He smiled at her as he chopped up vegetables. Heat stained her face as she realized she had spoken out loud. 

“I killed a man today. I don’t even know why.” She was a killer. A murderess. She shouldn’t care about the why’s of it. Only that, he was a terrorist and she had done a good thing. If she was to be a dog, then she’d be one with good reasons. 

“Focus on what’s important, Ollie.” She looked at Akio, blissfully unaware of the horrors she committed. She sighed, knowing he was right. She kneeled down in front of Akio and asked what he was playing on the laptop. Asking if she could try so she could get better at Cantonese. The kid was smart, and saw threw her easily. 

“How about we make a deal?” 

“You’re a bum. You don’t have anything.” Kid was too smart. She laughed.

“Well, this bum has something you don’t. Height. High enough to reach that candy stash.” 

“I want five.”

“Two.”

“Five.”

“I’ll swipe you three.”

“ _Five_.” She relented and promised him five pieces and took the computer. Sticking the thumb drive attached to the ring of keys she had taken off her target. What she saw there turned her blood to ice and terrified her to her core. 

“Maseo! Maseo, I need to meet with Waller.” She pulled out the drive and got up, Akio running off   
as Maseo started to admonish him for letting her use the laptop. 

“Maseo, I need the meet now.” 

“Why? She’ll want a reason.” 

“Ferris Air, flight 6-3-7.” 

Amanda Waller was a nasty piece of work. Olivia was convinced she wasn’t even human. Just something the devil made out of ice and darkness. As she growled about how much she hated Hong King and how much she disliked being summoned by one of her operatives, Olivia just listened. The way she said operative made her think she meant lackey. Olivia tried to tell Waller about Ferris Air flight 6-3-7, Waller stopped her short by acknowledging that she knew about it and that Olivia had stopped the plane from being shot down over Lian Yu. That revelation aside, which she had every intention of revisiting later.

“The man you had me take down today. He was Edward Fyers handler.” Waller turned back around to stare at her, shocked. “He worked… for you.”

“You’re out of your depth, Miss Queen.” 

“Do _not_ call me that. And I don’t think I am.” She growled. “I know that Castwidth had a thumb drive detailing everything. I think he knew you told Fyers to shoot down that plane. And I think you wanted him silenced!” 

“And the world thinks you are dead, Miss Queen.” She did have a point.

“You had me kill an innocent!”

“Who would believe a dead girl?” Waller rolled her eyes.

“Every journalist and blogger on this side of globe. All they need is that thumb drive I think I have.” She smirked, now she had Waller by the short hairs. It was a gamble. A very pricy gamble, especially if she lost. 

“The world is more complicated than you realize.”

“I don’t give a flying fuck about specifics, Waller. I want Maseo and his family free and clear of you and ARGUS.”

“I told Fyers to shoot down that plane to destabilize the Chinese economy. In truth I was after one person. A woman by the name of Chen Na Wei.” That sent her temper flaring. A whole plane of people, _innocent people_ , for one target? The woman Waller showed her was, not surprisingly, Chinese with white blonde hair. 

“Two years ago, we had our shot at her. You prevented that shot and now she is in Hong Kong and I need to know why.” 

“Fine. But after I give you this woman? Maseo and his family are free. You won’t bother them and you won’t threaten them. Deal?” 

“Very well. You bring me Chen Na Wei, and the Yamashiro’s are free to go.” They shook on it. The demon inside her snarling in rage and apprehension, fully expecting Waller to weasel her way out of this deal. 

She went back to the apartment, Maseo following her with questions pouring out of his mouth. She moved room to room, closing windows and drawing blinds. When she was sure everything was shut tight she turned to face him. He met his stare and told him what she had found on her target from earlier. What Waller had promised her in exchange for the woman Chen Na Wei. Maseo first looked confused, then frightened. Confused that Waller had agreed and scared that she had the balls to threaten Waller for the sake of him and his family. Over the next few days they had managed to find a man who would be able to help them figure out what Chen Na Wei was doing in Hong Kong. They had been waiting an hour, after they had circled the block five times. 

“You need to work on your patience, Ollie.” 

“Probably. But, it’s low on the list.” She smirked.

“Oh yeah? What’s first?” 

“Getting Tatsu to like me.” She laughed. The plan was fairly simple, find this guy and get him to flip on Chen. At least Waller wanted this one alive as he was only a courier. He would employ the dead-drop technique. Once they made contact, they would follow and intercept the information. She looked around and found him in the sea of people. She followed after, Maseo following behind her at a distance. As she rounded the corner, a fist flew into her face and had her seeing stars. 

“Ollie? Did he make you?” 

“Yeah, I think he did.” She groaned as she got up and ran after him. He threw stacks of plastic, colorful crates at her and in her path. Just like on Lian Yu, she vaulted over them without losing her stride. Just as she chased him to a street, a silver car came flying in and he hit the windshield with a crack. He went tumbling off the hood and to the ground; she looked at him and knew without checking that he was dead. Maseo searched his pockets but found nothing. 

“I didn’t see him drop anything.”

“You did. You just don’t know it.” 

That night, she sat on the floor with Akio a little way away from her. She kept replaying the day over and over in her mind. Trying to remember if she had seen him toss or stash anything and where that was. Akio asked her as much. He invited her to play the memory game with him. As she sat down across from him and his laid out tiles, he flipped over two then asked her where one of them was. She smiled and tapped the correct tile. He smiled and told her that her memory was fine. Tatsu came in as said something to him in Japanese, whatever it was had the boy running off to another place in the house. 

“I didn’t mean any offence, Tatsu. We were just playing a game.” 

“Miss Queen, I will house you, feed you, and clothe you. But my son is off limits.” She hissed. Olivia didn’t mind Tatsu’s hatred of her. She would have acted the same if the roles were reversed. 

“Please don’t call me that.” She hated being called that. Trying to run from that day on Lian Yu with Fyers didn’t work. Made things worse. She went to get up and leave Tatsu, so she would feel better about her presence but Tatsu stopped her. She grabbed a candle and a box of matches and sat down across from her. 

“My husband says you’re having problems remembering what you saw earlier.” 

“That’s the problem. I didn’t see anything.” 

“You see and hear a lot more than you think.” Tastu told her to close her eyes and she did after an eye roll. Breathing when she told her to and how. As Tatsu continued to speak, words muffled to her ears, images flashed across her memory. The man she tailed running from her. How he hit the windshield and she wasn’t sure if the crunch came from the glass or his body. That he hadn’t hit her with his fist but a mule kick. When he was tossing crates at her, his arm and jacket shifted. Like he was digging for something. Her eyes opened in a flash and she jumped up. Running out of the apartment and back to the crates in bare feet. She found the envelope and grabbed it on a run. Not stopping until she was back with Tastu and Maseo. Inside the envelope was a picture of a valley and mountain range. Maseo scanned the image into his computer and ran a program that showed a message. 

_Locate Li Kuan Hui._

“If Chen Na Wei is interested in him, so are we.” This was good. She was one step closer to getting Maseo and his family away from Waller and into relative safety. 

After a week, Li Kuan Hui was still hidden from Maseo and ARGUS. Which meant that Olivia was stuck in the house with Tatsu. She honestly didn’t mind but she wanted to make things easier on the woman by staying scarce. But no, instead, Tatsu seemed to always be able to find her. Which led to the current argument over her laundry and why Tatsu hated her so much. Olivia had thought that, during the meditation thing they at least had come to be more that hostile strangers. Tatsu insisted that the moment during meditation was over and that she could celebrate by doing her own laundry. Embarrassingly enough, it meant that she had to admit to the woman that she didn’t know how to. Maseo left to go down to the docks and Olivia jumped at the chance to get away from Tatsu but he said she had to stay. 

“What am I supposed to do?” 

“Your laundry, apparently.” He laughed at her. It was a scary thing to realize that domestic life was hard and that killing others was easy. She supposed she should feel remorse but she didn’t. The only thing she felt bad about was that Maseo and Tatsu were the ones that had to put up with her darkness. 

“Do you really think that?” Tatsu asked. She turned away and picked up the laundry basket. 

“I really don’t know how to do laundry. Wasn’t really a thing in Purgatory.” 

“You know what I mean, Olivia.” That was the first time Tatsu had ever said her name. 

“On the island… it was always kill or be killed… I am Waller’s dog so that your family can be free of the same fate. I am willing to drown in evil if that’s what it will take.” She left Tatsu in the living room, determined to get away from this conversation and to learn how to do her own laundry. 

When Maseo had yet to return at nightfall, Tatsu began to worry. Olivia was only worried because she still held the same rule that movement at night was dangerous. A hang-up from the island but it still held true either on a deserted island or in civilization. Tatsu’s worry bothered her. Really bothered her. She tried to calm her but the island had destroyed what social graces in comforting another she had. She went to the room they had given her and pulled out the trunk that held her gear. Putting on the hood she had no business wearing and the bow and quiver she was unworthy of, she told Tatsu that she would go find Maseo and bring him back. Tatsu wanted to come with but she refuse to allow that. Not only would Maseo ream her out for it but she wanted their hands as clean as possible.

Being in the city was much the same as being in the forest; traveling along roof tops wasn’t noticed and no one looked up for anything. The docks were quiet. Only the gentle lapping of the water and she found herself loathing that sound. It would be a long time before she would be able to stand being near the water let alone get in it. High up on the roof, she watched as guys who were most definitely not dock workers moved around. If anyone would know what happened to Maseo and where he was, it would be them. She notched three arrows, aiming at the three youngest looking of the group. Letting them fly as she dropped down from her perch, they hit their mark. Three bodies dropping with a thud, she landed on them. Tucking into a roll as she notched two more and drew the string. 

“I’m looking for a man who was supposed to be here. Tall. Long hair. Thin beard.” The men said   
nothing so she dropped the aim of her bow and hit them in the legs. 

“The word ARGUS mean anything to you?” she growled. 

“Three men, they worked for ARGUS. They’re all dead.” One man shouted at her. She retrieved the arrows she spent, and apologized to the living for the loss of their men. The walk back to the apartment was long and slow. What in the hell was she going to tell Tatsu? To Akio? The thought weighed her down heavily as she approached the door. She dropped her hood and was about to turn the knob when she noticed she had blood on her hands. She used her teeth to pull up her sleeve and walked inside. On the floor of the living room was Tatsu, Akio, and Maseo. Whole and healthy and without injury. 

“Where have you been?” he asked. Relief wafted over her, sagging her shoulders and draining her worry. 

“Nowhere special.” She said. She walked away, leaving the family alone, and dropped her gear and locked herself in the bathroom. Scrubbing the blood from her hands until the pink water ran clear. Continuing to scrub them clean even after that. 

During the night, she woke from her pile of blankets by the open window to the sound of footfalls in the hallway outside her door. Very soft footsteps from a thin person, it had to be Tatsu. Just in case it wasn’t, her hand gripped the knife under the wad of cloth she used as a pillow. The person stopped at her door and opened it. She kept her breathing deep and even, knuckles straining against the steel. 

“Olivia?” yup, that was Tatsu. Her fingers unwound from the hilt and she rolled over and sat up. Tatsu was in pajamas and she was still in the same clothes she had worn all day. She kept her eyes on the floor; she didn’t want to look at Tatsu. 

“Thank you.” Her head snapped up at the soft voice. “For trying to find him. For trying to get us away from ARGUS.” She dropped her head again.

“Don’t mention it.” She didn’t do it because she was a good person. She did it because she had to. Because it was her punishment to surround herself with this happy family she should have had but lost. 

“Liv? Waller wants to see you.” Maseo called from the hallway. Without a word she got up and stripped to change clothes, turning to grab another shirt. The gasp they both let out might as well have been screams of bloody murder. 

“Do I need my gear?” when he didn’t answer she looked at him over her shoulder as she pulled the new shirt down. He swallowed and nodded. 

They met Waller in the same abandoned construction site they always dragged her too when she had tried to run in the beginning. A man was in the same orange plastic chair they set her in with his hands bound and duct tape over his mouth. Waller said that this man knew the location of a very big bomb and she was to get its location. This she could do. She could just pretend that this man was Fyers and take vengeance on him. She was going to start as soon as Waller left but stopped. Walking over to Maseo and telling him to leave. When he said he couldn’t, she sighed and asked if he could just go to the ground floor. Far enough down so that he would see or hear what she was about to do. When he went down the stairwell, she waited until she could no longer hear his foot falls. Then, and only then, did she unchain the beast inside her and turn to her guest. A smile graced her lips and the man shivered. 

_Are you watching, Slade? See what I will do to make up for what I have done?_ Of course, her soulmate didn’t answer her. 

Maseo didn’t like to lie to his family but he did it to protect them. And he hated it even more when it was to Olivia. He felt sick at what Waller was asking her to do. So, instead of going down to the ground floor like she wanted, he went down one floor. She was doing all of this for him, the least he could do was help her to shoulder the burden of her deeds. He could hear them talking. The guy to be tortured was saying that Olivia’s hands were shaking. That she couldn’t do it. He heard her laugh. It set his teeth on edge and filled him with icy dread. He heard the _whoosh_ and _thunk_ of her arrow hitting something. But the man didn’t cry out. 

“Oh, don’t be a baby! It was just a nick!” Maseo would never forget those words for as long as he lived. Much less coming from the quiet voice that belongs to Olivia Queen.


	17. Episode 17: A New Leash on Life

Unfortunately, Olivia didn’t get the information in time. The bomb went off before her guest spoke. The reason wasn’t because he was a strong willed man. No. It was because she had killed him before he could break. She watched the explosion happen from the busted window of the high-rise they were in. If she didn’t breathe or move she could hear the screams of the people down below. Screaming in agony, both physical and mental. The beast was chained back up and she hated the sound not because it was annoying to her. She hated the sound because this was her fault. In her zeal to get some vengeance for herself and the ability to actually torture another, she had gone overboard. Everything she touched turned to ashes. 

Waller was angry with her, but that was fine. A master could be angry with their dog as it was the nature of the world. She didn’t stay in the house with the Yamashiro family. She stayed on the roof all day and slept on it at night. Well, she tried to sleep. Really, she just lay there and forced herself to remember the screams she heard days prior. Keeping it fresh in her mind to torture herself over her failure. After she hadn’t eaten for four days straight, Tatsu crawled onto the roof with dinner for her. Olivia barely paid her any mind but when Tatsu didn’t leave she sighed and picked up the bowl of rice. 

“It’s okay if you hate me. I do.” 

“You went out alone to look for my husband. How could I hate you after that?” 

“Because I’m a monster.” The rice stated like nothing. So did the fish and the vegetables. When Tatsu didn’t say thing more and hadn’t left the roof, she knew the woman was trying to find the words to tell her that she wasn’t. 

“I fell in love with someone on the island. Did Maseo tell you? I was also pregnant apparently.” She set the empty dishes down and stared at the glowing city off in the distance. 

“Slade?” Ah, so she had been talking in her sleep again. She only nodded, still unable to say the name out loud. 

“On the island I had be something else… a monster to fight the monsters that lived there… the memories of what happened to me…” 

“You don’t have to be a monster here.” 

“I do. Until you and Maseo and Akio are free, I will be a monster and do what needs to be done. At least… I thought I could…” She didn’t say anything else. What was there to say? She was responsible for the death of thousands in that blast because she couldn’t control herself. Without Slade or Shado, the beast inside her was free to roam as it pleased. There was no one left to help her cage it. She felt a weight on her side, Tatsu was holding her. Her body locked up in the embrace that was meant to soothe. 

“Let us help you. Let us in and we will help you carry that burden. We will chain that monster you think you have.” Tears slipped down Tatsu’s cheeks. 

_No… don’t waste them on me…_

“Liv? Waller wants to see you.” Maseo called from down below. She untangled herself from Tatsu, offering the woman a small smile as she moved to help her down from the roof and jumped down after. As she grabbed her gear, the two embraced and spoke soft words to each other she didn’t understand. They broke apart and Maseo drove them to the high-rise she had tortured a man in before. And just like before, Waller wanted her to torture this man. The man who knew what China White was doing in Hong Kong. Waller left and her stomach churned but she shook it off and told Maseo to go as she began to mentally unchain the monster inside. When she hadn’t heard him move she looked at him, the beast already flying to the surface. 

“I said… _Go_.” She snarled.

“I won’t leave you, Olivia. Not this time.” She narrowed her eyes at him. 

“Don’t trust me not to fuck this up?” The beast growled.

“No. I won’t leave you to this burden alone. I will chain your animal for you.” Her eyes widened and the beast fell silent. No, this wasn’t supposed to happen. He was innocent! Maseo did bad things for the sake of his family and their safety. He didn’t need this darkness. _Her darkness_. His hands were on her shoulders and she realized she was shaking. 

“Listen to me, Liv. Let me help you back from the ledge so you can be the same person you always were.” Stop talking. Please stop talking. 

“I read your file; I know what happened to you. You are strong. Akio thinks you’re hilarious. You have a light inside you that should have gone out years ago but it didn’t.” Just. Stop. Talking! 

“Dive into the darkness, Olivia Queen. Trust that I will help you back into the light.” She should tell him to go to hell. To just leave but she didn’t. A strange calm washed over her, settling her down and easing her soul. What was left of it. She wiped her eyes, mildly intrigued that there were tears. She flashed him a bright smile; she could see worry and concern in his eyes. 

“I need to get started.” She said and walked over to Li Kuan Hui. She was sure if she looked into a mirror she would still be smiling. But it wasn’t really her smile. It was Slade’s. His infamously deadly _I-like-swords_ smile. 

“They will be looking for me! They will kill me before I talk!” the bound man hissed. But he was shaking, and it made her smile grow wider. 

“I’m sure they will, Pumpkin. But until then, let’s get to know each other.” He started sputtering nonsense. That he wouldn’t talk. She socked him in the jaw hard enough to snap his head to the side and blood flew free like it was trying to get away from him. The beast purred, loving the sight of that color on the floor. 

“Now then… where is Chen Na Wei?” she asked. The man said nothing, only groaned in pain. She punched him again in the temple and he toppled out of the chair. 

“Why is she in Hong Kong?” still the man said nothing. Fine by her. She’d get the answers she wanted.

“I guess… I’m just going to have to get creative.” She sighed as she crouched down next to him. Elbows on her knees and one palm cradling her chin. 

When it was over, and had given up the information on Chen Na Wei, she and Maseo left him for ARGUS to clean up. The second they were out of the building, she sagged against him. He half supported and half carried her to the car and shut her in. She was shaking, nails scratching against her jeans. Curl. Uncurl. Curl. Uncurl. The beast was still singing in her veins, triumphant. Maseo got in on the other side and drove, drove and kept driving. Talking to her softly, trying to coax her back into her body and mind and lock up the animal within. She asked him to pull over, barely getting out before she emptied out her stomach. He rubbed her back as she tossed out everything she ate. 

“Think about Akio. He wouldn’t want to see you like this. Remember, one man’s agony is not worth that of a city.” She got back into the car, feeling mildly better and more in control than she had been in months. When they entered the apartment, Akio greeted her with a hug. She stood frozen for a moment then quickly scrambled to get away from him. She stuttered out that she had fallen and hurt her side before excusing herself. 

_Oh god she touched him… why did Tatsu let her touch him…? he was tainted now. Broken. It was her fault. All her fault. She would kill him like she had done to so many others…_   
Warm, small hands grabbed her and turned her around. Tatsu stood in her room with steady fingers on her arms. She started apologizing. She hadn’t meant to do it. She really didn’t. But Tatsu only looked sad. Maseo came in shortly after and stood by his wife. Reaching out a hand to calm her, she shook them off and crouched into a corner. Trying to make herself as small and as little a threat as possible. 

“Listen to us, Olivia. You are not tainted. You are our friend.” Tatsu said and held her arms out in invitation. Without thinking about it, she launched herself into those arms. Burying her face in Tatsu’s lap, she cried softly. She wanted to be punished. Needed to be but she also wanted some comfort. Just someone to tell her that she was a good person still and to not look at her with fear or disgust.   
The next morning, she tried to play it off. That she was fine now. But in reality, she was worse than before. She only ate to placate them but soon after, everything made a return appearance. The only think she could do was train. And train she did. With Maseo and Tatsu both who were experienced fighters. When she wasn’t training with them, she was going over the information gained from Li Kuan Hui. 

A biotech company had been working on an antibiotic that could fight anything and wound up with a virus that could kill anything. A single vial of which, could wipe out an entire city. Like, Hong Kong for instance. Or Starling City. Chen Na Wei wanted the bioweapon so she was in Hong Kong to get it. They had already gotten someone at the company to steal it which meant that she had another interrogation to do once they found the man responsible. Part of her wished they never found the man, if only to stop her free-fall into the darkness. As fate would have it, she only had to wait a week this time. The man was ordinary; the fear was tangible in his voice. He was speaking in Chinese as she re-checked the binding that held him. 

“We don’t want your money.” She snapped at him in Chinese. Ignoring the look of shock on Maseo’s face. 

“We want the vial of Omega you stole. My partner can be very persuasive.” Maseo said as she drew her bowstring and aimed it at his shoulder.   
Hours later, along with three dislocated fingers, an arrow to her right shoulder, and four cracked ribs the man still protested his innocence. She pulled the arrow free and growled. The arrow head was chipped. She and Maseo argued about his innocence. He believed him, she did not. People were snakes, always looking for an easy target. He had to be lying; they had a video of him taking it. 

“There is a drug called Votura, makes people more susceptible to suggestion.”

“Really? That’s a thing?” she rolled her eyes. 

“Those who get dosed with it don’t usually remember what they were told to do.” She shook her head and moved to wake him up but he caught her arm. 

“What?” she hissed.

“Time to come back, Olivia.” One sentence was all it took and she was back in the driver’s seat. She looked away from the man she had just spent that last few hours torturing. She couldn’t look at the damage she’d done. The man was dead so they left him there and went back to the apartment. Finding the door busted open and no Tatsu or Akio. Furniture was over turned, glass and pottery fragments littered the ground. They met with Waller the next morning, who did nothing but chew them out for it. 

“We were following the Omega virus like you ordered us to.” She hissed.

“I ordered you to be cautious. That how you protect your loved ones.” Waller replied with as much emotion as if she were talking about stock prices.

“We need an extraction team for my family.”

“From where? We don’t know where Chen Na Wei is.” 

“So we find her, get Tatsu and Akio and the virus.” 

“It’s more complicated than that. The Omega is harmless without its counterpart, Alpha.” 

“And where is that?” She asked.

“In possession of the Chinese military.”

“So, it’s safe.” 

“Hardly. The only way to secure the counter part is to destroy it.” There was a hint of laughter in Waller’s voice. 

“By then my wife and son will be dead.” Waller brought them through an abandoned construction site, showing them a blueprint of the military lab where the Alpha was being kept. She told them that they would break in and recover it and disable the GPS tracker embedded in it. But that didn’t answer the question of Maseo’s family. 

“I am focusing on the task at hand which is not your family. I suggest you do the same.” Waller walked off and she put a hand on his shoulder. She looked at the blue prints, studying the layout.

“We will get them back, Maseo. Count on it.” She said and grabbed her gear. 

The next evening, they stood on a roof across from the lab that housed the Alpha component. Maseo quickly assembling the long range rifle as she strapped the quiver in place. She stayed silent, not sure of what to say to him that he would believe because it was obvious that Waller wasn’t a woman of her word. She tied a rope to the arrow and let it fly. Hearing it sink into the stone, she tied off the other end and used it to crawl over to a window. Maseo took a single shot but when she got there, there was only the small hole made by his bullet. She kicked off the window and slammed into it. It barely broke. She kicked off and landed on it twice more before the glass gave way and she was inside. She pulled her bow from her back and signaled that she was in.   
Jogging down the corridors on light feet so that she made no sound, she found the lab and the Alpha. She grabbed the vial from its container and took out the GPS as Maseo and the two with him caught up with her. Two gun shots rang out and the two strangers dropped, followed by more gunfire as she and Maseo ran for cover. These weren’t military trained. These were dogs of another breed. The Triad kind. Maseo got up and returned fire, dropping one of the enemies before popping back down beside her. 

“Head for the exit, I’ll cover you!” he shouted. 

“No! I’m not leaving you here!” 

“You need to get the Alpha out of here!” he did have a point. 

“No offence! But I am not telling Tatsu I left your ass here!” when she moved to bolt, Maseo laid down cover fire. Clipping a barrel next to one of the men and causing him to lose his balance and fall from the alcove above. She ran, dropping to her knees and skidding across the floor. Turning, she fired an arrow at the only other man firing at them. He dropped like a rock. They moved into the hallway, ducking for cover when another enemy appeared and began firing. When his gun clicked empty, she struck him with her bow and grabbed him. Neck under her arm and him bent backwards. 

“I’m sorry.” She said before she snapped his neck.

They left without any more resistance and only one casualty on their side. Unsurprisingly, Waller insisted on meeting them to retrieve the Alpha component in that same abandoned high-rise. Also not surprising, Waller was pissed that she had killed that man rather than knock him out so that she could “interrogate” him. She was sure Waller could only be more pissed had she let the man go and left him alive. When Waller left, and she was sure the woman was well out of ear shot, she turned to Maseo with a grin. 

“You know what I like about my arrowheads?” when he looked at her with confusion she grinned wider. “Since they’re stone, I can put small divots into them. So that GPS unit is most likely stuck in the meat of that goons shoulder.” 

“Olivia I-”

“I promised you would get them back, Maseo. I aim to keep that promise.” 

“For what you’ve done… I will forever be in your debt, Olivia.” She only smiled at him. It was a small chance, but it was there and it was the best they had right now. 

They tracked the GPS signal to a nightclub in downtown. The place was something that she was familiar with. Bartenders doing heavy pours with alcohol to get customers to spend more. Men dressed in their finest to land a girl for the night and women dressed scantily to do the same. The music was loud, the bass thumping in her ribcage and the strobe lights made her nauseous. The signal they had been following seemed to be in a room off of the main club floor in a VIP area that was thick with muscled guards. More muscle than a simple VIP area should need, but this was a Triad front. The bartender looked at them in an odd way that set off alarm bells in her head. An instant later and they were surrounded by Triad bouncers with guns jammed in to their sides. The bouncers brought them back into the VIP area where Chen Na Wei sat with a drink in her hand. 

“You are late.” Why did that sound like she had been expecting them?

“I was addressing your partner.” She looked at Maseo who only stated that he wanted to see his wife and son. When the men next to him grabbed him, Maseo grabbed the offensive appendage and twisted   
it until the crack could be heard over the music.

“I said, I want to see my family.” He shoved the man to the floor. “Once I know they are alive, then you can have the Alpha.” Chen jerked her head and another man came out from a back room with Tatsu and Akio in tow. A server brought in a few glasses and a bottle of very expensive scotch. 

“They are my family. You do not get to judge me.”

“We all do crazy things for family.” She smiled, hoping to ease his guilt some. Maseo held out the Alpha component and Chen took it. Testing it for authenticity before letting them go like it was a fine piece of art. The machine she put it in beeped. 

“It’s fake. Kill them.” 

Maseo kicked up the silver tray the server had brought to deflect the bullets aimed at him from the man to his right. Olivia grabbed the arm of the men next to her to keep him from firing the gun in a direction that would result in injury to Tatsu or Maseo or Akio. She pulled the gun free and grabbed the tray Maseo held out to her and whacked her opponent over the head until he was out cold. With their three opponents out for the count, they ran into the main club. Ignoring the screams and grunts of protest from the patrons. She grabbed the Triad goon rushing her and tossed him into the wall, grabbing the gun from his waist band before tossing him into the other wall. She fired it at the next, hitting him square in the chest. She jumped onto the bar and slide across it, letting off another shot at a man on the dance floor. Hopping off the counter and running for the door, pistol whipping the one who was stupid enough to block their path. They didn’t stop or slow down until they were back at the apartment. Thankfully, Akio had remained asleep during the whole ordeal so he was none the wiser as Tatsu put him to bed. She grabbed Maseo as he went with her.

“I don’t judge you for this, but please let me in on it next time?” 

“I wasn’t bluffing, Olivia.” _What?_

“Did you hit your head back there?” 

“No, Waller knew I’d try something like this so she must have switched out the vials before I took it.” She wanted to admonish him for his choice but who the hell was she to judge? If it was for Slade and   
Shado? She’d arm the thing and set it loose in every major city around the world. 

As soon as Akio was sound asleep in bed, Tatsu and Maseo moved around the house quickly. Stuffing clothing into bags and weapons and munitions in another. She understood their urgency. Even if Waller didn’t know Maseo had tried to take the virus, Chen Na Wei knew where they lived and that made this place unsafe for all of them. Maseo gave her the trunk she kept her gear in and told her to run. She stood stock still in the middle of the living room. She couldn’t run, she had a deal with Waller. Olivia would be her obedient dog in exchange for Maseo and his family going free. If she ran then Maseo and his family would pay the price. 

“Call the press. Call your family. If the world knows Olivia Queen is alive then it will limit her options.” 

“But Waller will-”

“Torture you to find us.” 

“So you’re leaving?” she had to make sure. She could run, free of guilt, if she knew that they were going to run from Waller as well. 

“We are going to take the ferry to Shanghai. Then disappear.” He handed her a wad of bills and pulled her into a hug. 

“You saved us, Olivia. Just like you promised. Now save yourself.” She nodded and left, sparring a glance back to Tatsu and Akio. 

Out of the apartment and well into downtown she tried to find a pay phone. Walking slowly to blend in with the crowd of people with late at night. Adopting a casual walk when near a group of people doing the same and a stagger when she was near a group of drunks. Scanning the street every now and then to try and spot Waller's men. She hopped over to the pay phone, dialing her mother and getting her voicemail. She panted out the message to her mom to tell everyone that she was alive. That she needed help and that she was in Hong Kong when a hand fell on the lever with a click and the call disconnected. She dropped the phone and ran. Shoving a goon in front of her out of the way. People shouted out in alarm, as she tried to weave through the crowd. The man who found her grabbed her and she spun around on him. Pushing him off balance and into a stack of crates, punching the next man who got in her way she bolted back towards the pay phone. 

She could hear the pounding footsteps of men coming after her but she didn’t have the time to deal with all of them. Slade had taught her on the island that is she was caught while trying to stay hidden, you disengaged and ran. You never stopped to fight for more than to get the attacker off of you. A man stopped right in front of her and she tackled him, hoping to take him down and roll back onto her feet. The man was expecting it and rolled with her, flipping her onto her stomach and hit her with a stun gun. She could only grunt before darkness overtook her vision.


	18. Episode 18: Falling into Breaking

Olivia woke up sometime later, strapped to a table with a piece of cloth over her face. She heard noises and tried to turn her head to see her surroundings but someone held her head. Water suddenly rushed in to her mouth and nose. She tried to swallow but her throat locked up. The torrent of water continued for a while, she had hoped she would just pass out and die before the torture could continue but she didn’t. When it stopped the cloth was removed and Waller stood off to the side. Commending her for lasting ten minutes when she knew Special Forces who could last longer than three. She was let up from the table and put into a chair as she coughed and gagged. Water pouring out of her nose like she had broken it. 

“Tell me where the Yamashiro’s are and it will stop.” She sighed as she let the beast rush to the surface. Then, she started laughing. Her family would be looking for her as soon as they got her message. 

“Because your mother issued a press release? We erased that message before she even heard it.” That should have filled her with fear but it didn’t. So what if her mother didn’t know she was alive? She continued to laugh. Maseo and Tatsu and Akio would be safe so long as she pissed them off enough to accidentally kill her. Besides, Waller wouldn’t kill her mother.

“You’re right about that. She’s too public but your brother on the other hand…” Wow, Waller was shooting for her own death wasn’t she? The beast and her growled in tandem. The darkness inside her uncoiled. Spreading throughout her body with inky tendrils. 

“He has quite the substance abuse problem. Poor Speedy, so young to be found dead in a car with a needle in his arm.” She looked at Waller, imaging how it would look to have an arrow sticking out of the perfect neck. 

“He will be safe if you answer the question.” 

“Tell you what, Waller. You won’t touch Theo; he’s just as high profile as my mom. I have been tortured before. So you bring it on bitch.” She laughed. Waller snarled at her and barked for the two men to continue. And she got her wish. Waller brought everything she had. 

Days, weeks, or hours later they let her have a day’s reprieve. Allowing her body to heal slightly so they didn’t accidentally kill her. She had to hand it to them; they knew what they were doing. She barely had time to laugh in between screaming. The beast inside was laughing right along with her. She heard the door open and shuffling, followed by a thud and a groan as someone was tossed in with her. Perhaps they were going to kill an innocent person in front of her. Again. because appealing to her humanity had worked so well the last four times. The person they threw in let out a gasp and she remembered she was shirtless at the moment. So all the wounds and scars gained from her time on the island were in full view. 

“God… Olivia, what have they done to you?” that sounded like Maseo but that couldn’t be right. He was long gone with his family and wouldn’t come back for her. He would have to be stupid to do so. She opened her eyes, thinking she’d be hallucinating but no. Maseo was there. On the floor in front of her in chains. She growled. Maseo should never be bound in such a way. 

“If you’re a hallucination brought on by insanity, go bother someone else. I’m busy.” She laughed. 

“Liv, it’s me.” She pinned him with a stare, then head butted him when he got close enough. Yup, pain was real. Had to be him. 

“Why are you here?” she hissed. 

“I came back. I won’t let Waller take her anger at my mistakes out on you.” She kicked him in the leg and scowled at him.

“You’re a fucking idiot.” Her two tortures, Thing One and Thing Two, entered and decked them both. Knocking them out cold. When she came too again, she was in a car across from Waller and next to Maseo. 

“You’re not dead, if that’s what you’re wondering.” 

“First guess was hell, seeing as you work there and all.” She snorted. 

“You’re lucky I need you, Miss Queen.” She rolled her eyes. Luck, it seemed, was like beauty. All in the eye of the beholder. 

“Chen Na Wei has left China. We tracked her here.” Waller’s tone sounded less like what she said and more along the lines of _good-doggie_. 

“Yeah? Where’s here?” she looked out the window and froze. Blood draining from her face and insanity gone for the moment. 

_“Welcome to Starling City!”_ is what the sign read. 

“Welcome Home, Miss Queen.” 

If it were not for Maseo’s hand on her arm, she’d have lunged at Waller and strangled the bitch. Maseo said nothing during the trip to a shady apartment building in the shady part of town. It was smart of him; better not to let Waller in on exactly how much she relied on him. In the room, Waller showed them images of China White leaving Hong Kong and entering Starling City. Her ears were ringing in anger so all she really heard were the important bits. Until she showed her a picture of the man who was helping the Triad.

“I know him. He works for my family’s company.” She seethed, his name was in her father’s little book. “He came to my house for Christmas.” 

“And that, Miss Queen, is why you two are still alive.” Again with that tone of _good-doggie_. “Have no illusions. If you threaten this mission, I will remove you both from the equation. Along with anyone who finds out you are alive.” 

“Woof-woof.” She hissed and Waller looked pleased. 

The next morning, when they found Peter Kang’s whereabouts she stood next to a building as Maseo placed a tracker on his car. Her fingers touching the short ends of her hair that she had just cut. It no longer reached her shoulders, and she wore pulled low enough that anyone passing by would simply think that she was just another man on the street. She and Maseo spoke in low tones. Chen would be an idiot to keep the Omega component on her person; hopefully Kang would know where it was. They got in the car and followed Kang as he left. They watched as he went into a building and Maseo started talking computer nonsense. 

“Pretend I am an idiot.” 

“We can’t hack him.” 

“See? Was that so hard?”

“Since it’s you? No, never is.” She laughed and popped him on the stomach. She would have to get into Queen Consolidated computer network to get the intel on Kang’s computer. She couldn’t be recognized so she would have to go in at night. The layout should still be the same unless her mom went on a remodeling spree while she’s been in hell. She looked at the building of her family’s company, eyes drawn to a teenage boy in a school uniform. 

_Theo… you look good…_ she thought as he looked at her brothers face. 

“Olivia, who is that?”

“My baby brother.” She whimpered. Just being near Maseo was enough to chain up her animal right now and she didn’t fight it. Since they had some time to kill, he allowed her to follow her brother. She watched as Theo got out of the car and walked away from it. 

“Last time I saw him, he was chasing after me with action figures.” Skirting through the forest, she followed him to two stone slabs sticking up out of the ground. 

“Hey Ollie. Dad.” Her chest ached. 

“Stopped by the office today. Saw mom talking to Walter. I think something is happening there but I don’t know.” Another boy walked up behind him and called out to her brother. 

_I’m here, Theo… I’m right here…_

“Boyfriend?” Maseo whispered. She shook her head. She had no clue who that was. 

“Got my delivery?” 

“Got your inheritance?” they exchanged something. Had Waller been telling the truth? Was Theo using drugs to escape the pain she had caused him? That made her hurt more than the torture had. 

“The hell is this?!” Tommy hissed as he approached. 

“What are you doing here?” Theo asked.

“About to ask Jordan the same.”

“Just paying my respects.” 

“And you have. Now, get lost and stay away from him.” Jordan walked off without another word. 

“You should be bringing flowers not looking to score.” 

“What are you doing here, Tommy?” Theo rolled his eyes. 

“To thank you for my birthday card. And to tell you my party is 21 and over.” 

“Oh, we both know that isn’t true.”

“For you it is.”

“Yeah, well, you’re not my sister.” This whole exchange was all wrong. Theo and Tommy should be hugging. Laughing about their day. Not arguing over parties and drugs. 

“I know I am not, but right now? I am glad she is gone. Because seeing you like this would break her heart.” She winced. Both at his harsh tone and because he was right. She could hear it shattering as she witnessed firsthand what she had done. Theo left and so did she and Maseo. The longer she stayed the more she hurt and she was so tired of hurting. Maseo drove them back to the apartment and she just shut down. Scratching that familiar itch and tapping her fingers against her thigh. She broke into the company that night, the morning’s event locked down from her memory until she was in a better place to deal with it. 

The office was just as her father had left it. From the gaudy art on the walls to the antique wooden desk that was used by some royal whoever. Even the items on the desk were the same but what was different was the biometric scanner. She was in the system when they had added it in but why would she still be in the system when everyone thought she was dead? 

“Why would they take you out? You are dead.” She sighed and pressed her thumb to the reader next to the screen. It beeped and the red light turned green. She plugged in the small device into the USB port and watched as it pulled all of Kang’s internet traffic. A small window popped up with her father’s name on it. She clicked on it and a second window popped up with two files in it. One for her and one for Theo. She clicked to transfer the data but it would take eight minutes. 

_Fuck it._

She grabbed a random jump-drive from the drawer and transferred the data. The device to pull the internet traffic finished and she pulled it out. She heard the elevator open and then there were footsteps. She hid pulled the drive as soon as it finished and dashed out the side door of the office. Listening to the woman as she started talking to herself then scolding herself for doing so. She couldn’t help but smile as she turned and left. Back at the apartment, Maseo went over the data and if the information on Kang’s computer was correct then the auction for the Omega bioweapon was tonight. She had some time to kill and she hated killing it idly so while Waller and Maseo were looking over computers, she slipped away and found Tommy’s house. 

To any party goer, she wasn’t just another guest. No, she was just your friendly neighborhood drug dealer. After all, she wasn’t dressed like other boys in their signature Polo shirts and Khaki shorts. Dark jeans and a hoodie to hide who she really was and yet she blended in with none the wiser. It was interesting to see that the club scene was fairly similar in different parts of the world. Thumping bass, loud music, drugs and booze. The house was still the same as it had been when she had last been here just days before getting on The Queen’s Gambit. She passed by Tommy as he made a pass at some leggy model-type and hide close by so she could hear the exchange between him and Lucas. 

“What is it?” Lucas asked when Tommy’s face soured. 

“I just don’t believe who’s here. Queen.” She pressed closer into her hiding space. Thinking that he had seen her but no, he had seen Theo. She grit her teeth, grinding them when Theo walked away and bought more drugs off of the boy she had seen him with earlier today. That slimy, piece of shit walked up the stairs and she followed him, ducking into a hallway across from the bathroom he walked into. When he came out, she came up behind him and shoved him into a wall. 

“Stay away from Theo Queen.” 

“Who the hell--?” recognition dawned on his face. “Holy shit. You’re Olivia Queen. You’re supposed to be dead.” She walked back a step and then pushed him back into the wall. 

“Stay away from my brother.” She snarled. The idiot drew a switch blade and asked her if she’d like to be dead again. He thrusted the knife at her and she easily dodged and caught his forward momentum to put his head under her arm. Jerking him upright until his neck snapped and she tossed the limp body over the curlicue railing. She ran outside when the screaming started and watched the lights and sirens from the sidelines. Maseo crept up behind her, she didn’t look at him. Just watched and listened to the exchange of a broken man still mourning his dead son. 

“We are leaving.”

“Yeah. I’m still not sorry.” She said quietly. Maseo and her walked to his car in silence, looking over at her every other minute like he was waiting for her to snap and start laughing. She heard him talking when they reached the car. The auction was going to take place at an old steel factory her family used to own. She knew where it was, had been there a few time when she was younger before it shut down. She leaned against the car and breathed as tears stung her eyes.

“Maseo… my family is better off without me…”

“Liv… that is not true.” 

“But it is. They are.” She laughed darkly.

“They are grieving in their own way. You are not to blame for that.” She looked at him then. Tears falling down her face and a smile slicing it in half.

“I am… I’m a monster, Maseo.” He wrapped her in his arms and held her tightly. She buried her face in his shoulder and cried. He stroked her hair, his fingers warm on her scalp and he pushed her back so she could look at him. 

“A monster would not trade their freedom for someone else’s.” his thumb wiped away her tears. 

“A monster would not let themselves be bound to keep someone else safe.” He kissed her forehead and brought her in close again. 

“A monster would not risk everything for someone else’s family.” They got into the car then, and she fell asleep. She was so bone tired and soul weary that she just shut her eyes and shut out the world around her. She was sure that if she asked, he would have told her she continued to cry after she fell asleep. But she didn’t ask. Didn’t want proof that she was breaking.

 _Maybe… you broke a long time ago, Livvy?_ Slade asked in her head. 

She woke up again as they reached the steel factory the auction was to take place. She quickly put on her gear, even the hood she had no right to wear. She replayed her father’s words in her head. Their messages to survive and to make things better than they were. She thought of Shado and Slade as her legs carried her to follow Maseo without conscious thought. Robert Queen died so that she could live. Yao Fei taught her a lesson in survival. Slade taught her to fight for it and to keep herself unharmed. Shado taught her to accept herself, darkness and light together. She owed them all. She had _failed_ them all. God help her, she wasn’t going to fail Maseo. 

She, Maseo, and the team given to them by Waller were up in the rafters directly above the auction. No one below knew they were even there. That was, until, some idiot kicked the metal railing. The armed guards down below trained their sights upward and fired blindly, the bright lights in their eyes and the dark shadows casted by them giving them added cover. Chen Na Wei remained impassive, patiently and quietly waiting for the noise to stop so that she could continue. The team dropped like flies and Maseo ran out of ammo but she was still hidden. She was still unknown to them. She grinned, vicious and feral. The gunfire stopped and Chen continued to take bids as Maseo was brought down to her. When Chen ordered Maseo dead, she acted. Firing an arrow at the one closest to him then quickly jumping across the beams to have a new position they didn’t know about. Chen and Kang moved to leave but she fired another arrow at them. Causing them to change course as some of her goons fired at the place she had been in only moments before. Maseo picked up the gun she had left for him and picked off a few of the goons. 

She moved to the roof at the only exit large enough for a car and waited for China White and Kang. She pulled the gun from her thigh holster and fired, continuing to do so as she jumped down on top of it. Firing off three more at the retreating vehicle until it swerved and crashed. She stalked over to the car and pistol whipped Chen as she staggered out of the car. Maseo grabbed Kang, who had the virus in a metal case that was handcuffed to his hand. 

“You have a choice to make.” She snarled. 

“What choice?”

“Whether or not you wanna keep your hand, punkin.” She grinned at him. 

Needless to say, Kang opted to keep his hand. She waited with Maseo in the apartment Waller was using as a command center. The woman taking her sweet time in coming back. While they waited, Maseo tried to talk her down from the bloodlust that ran thick in her veins. He had her lay down on the couch with her head in his lap. He told her about Akio and how he was sad that they wouldn’t get to play anymore. About how Tatsu missed teasing her for not knowing how to do chores. When she heard the door open she jumped up and faced Waller. Bloodlust returning with anger as she eyed the heartless snake of a woman. 

“Thanks for bringing me home. Have a safe trip back to Hong Kong.” She snapped. 

“It isn’t that simple, Miss Queen.”

“The fuck it isn’t. You have the Omega, the Alpha, and Chen Na Wei. We had a deal.” 

“It isn’t up to me.” An older man walked into the room, wearing camouflage with the words U.S Army written on the breast pocket. 

“You have done quite the service to your country today, Miss Queen. Sorry to say, I have some news you’re not gonna wanna hear.” Shrieve said. She narrowed her eyes at him. His eyes held to truth of his soul. He didn’t have one. He was mired in darkness and that meant he was a very dangerous man. 

“Well, General, I’m used to that by now.” She hissed. She was getting really sick of getting bad news. 

“We need to debrief you… back in China.” She sighed and shook her head. “But once that is done, and the Omega is secured… I’ll personally make sure you go any place you want.” 

_His words are lies._ She seethed.


	19. Episode 19: Snakes

When they touched back down in China, from an unmarked plane with no flight plan, they brought her to the same building and the same room they had tortured her in. At least, this time around the only pain came from the pain in her ass from sitting in an uncomfortable chair as she was hooked up to a polygraph and went over the details of the Alpha-Omega affair. And she did tell them everything. Twice. And she answered the same every time. General Shrieve came in and sent the ARGUS goon away. 

“Waller is too thorough for her own good. And by that, I mean paranoid.” 

“I’m used to it.” She ignored his barb and focused more on the fact that, that sentence seemed to be her catchphrase. Still, where was Waller?

“The Alpha-Omega has become and Army matter. She is no longer participating. I’m sure that comes as a profound disappointment.” _Fucking liar._

“Oh, you have no idea.” She smiled pleasantly. Maseo entered as the general started talking words she wouldn’t have believed even if her life depended on it. The debrief was over. Maseo and his family were free and were going back to Japan. If she wanted, she could go with them and then wherever else she wanted to go. She kept her smile in place and shook his hand, sincere gratitude falling from her lips like wine. There was something very wrong with this man. His eyes told her that he was worse than Fyers if such a thing were possible. 

She left with Maseo and met with him and his family at the docks the next day. Akio ran to her and hugged her tightly, bending down to return it and let herself feel a small twinge of pain at the fact that this would never be her child. Tatsu asked her to stay with them in Tokyo before going home. Maseo chastised his wife and she smiled at the easy banter they had. Also something she would never have again. 

“Well, after I get back, I’ll send my family’s plane for you and you can all vacation in America.” She smiled. 

“Your family owns a plane?” Tatsu asked with a raised brow. 

“More of a jet, really.” She shrugged and walked with them to their waiting boat. As they approached, both she and Maseo clocked a hostile in a workers uniform. Maseo drew his gun and turned, shooting the hostile before he could get a shot off. Tatsu hugged Akio close and shielded him with her own body. He shot down another coming off of the boat as she shielded Tatsu and Akio and led them to duck behind metal containers. She picked up a broken piece of a mirror to get a bead on the remaining gunman’s positions. 

“Sniper on the roof!” she called to Maseo as a bullet whizzed by and broke her mirror shard. The shiny glass cut her fingers. 

“We have to get out of here!” Maseo shouted. She pointed to the delivery truck but he shook his head. She wished she had her gear with her but she was proficient with a gun. 

“Pass me the gun. I’ll cover you.” Maseo moved to say something else but she stopped him. “Talk later. Move now.” 

She jumped up and fired at the gunman until they were forced to hunker down to avoid death. Maseo, covered his family as they ran to the delivery truck. She clipped on in the shoulder, causing him to fall from his perch and knock him out of the equation. That left three more. She moved to the tanker to cover Maseo and the others as they made the final dash for the truck. Tatsu grabbed a piece of rebar and threw it at one, piercing his chest. Two left. Her gun spent, she dropped it and held fast to Akio’s wiggling body as he fought her tooth and nail to get to the safety of his parents. She looked at Tatsu and Maseo. 

“Go! Get him out of here!” she spared them one glance and expression filled with pain and took off with the boy in tow. Holding him tight to her body so that the bullets would hit her and leave him in peace. Tatsu let out a scream of his name and Olivia knew that the sound would haunt her nightmares for years to come. 

She brought Akio to the street market, easiest place to get lost in and that meant it was safe enough for her to settle both of them down for her to think of a plan. She promised him everything would be okay and he said he wanted to go home. She knew that feeling but also knew that this would probably be much harder on him than it was on her. Akio let out a shout in Japanese and took off. She went after him but it was more difficult for her as she didn’t have his small stature to move through the crowd. When he called out to her, she dropped to her knees and crushed him against her. 

“Please, don’t do that to me again!” 

“I thought I saw my dad.” She softened her features, hoping to soothe him but knew she fell short. She breathed deeply.

“I know, buddy. Listen, did your parents ever tell you to go somewhere specific if you ever got separated from them?” 

“Yes! The botanical gardens! Come on, they might be there now.” He grabbed her hand and drug her through the crowd. She kept a tight hand on his, determined not to lose him again. 

As they walked through the gardens, she asked him questions about the plants they passed. Granted, she could read the plaques but she needed to get his mind off of the situation. So she did the one thing that made her human. She told him about her brother. 

“You have a brother?”

“I do. And I miss him just as much as you miss your parents. But I will see him again. Just like you will see your parents.” 

“Why aren’t you with him then?” she smiled at him. 

“I told him I had to hang with my good buddy, Akio.” She told him that they used to go to botanical gardens just like this one. Except, he didn’t know the plants as well as Akio did and mostly they played hide and seek to drive their parents crazy. Her voice trailed off as she spotted two men in suits. Moving with purpose that had nothing to do with admiring the flora. When the men caught her stare, she hissed to Akio to run. It was easy to lose the goons in the twisting paths of the gardens and they ran to the nearest crowded street market. She kept her head on a swivel, keeping an eye out for more goons or that the ones from the gardens had found them. When she swung her head back frontward, she stopped dead in her tracks at the face of someone she never thought she’d see ever again.

“Shado?” 

“What? How do you know my sister?” the woman looked confused. 

“Later… please, my friend and I are in trouble. Can you help us get off the street?” she asked at Akio’s urgent call of her name. Shado’s twin asked about the details but she shook her head. 

“Please?” the woman nodded and led them to her apartment. 

“I’m Akio and this is-”

“Thea.” The less people who knew about her the better. She tried to explain that she didn’t know the specifics of why those men were after them before quickly shifting focus to the picture on the mantel of a man she knew very well. 

“My father, Yao Fei. Now, how do you know my sister?” she really hoped she could lie well enough to keep her from asking many more questions. She fed the woman a lie about them meeting in medical school but that she had dropped out because she didn’t have the stomach for it.

“When did you last see her?” that question brought it to the forefront of her mind with stunning clarity. The gunshot echoing in her ears.

“Been a while.” She said vaguely. 

“It’s been three years since they disappeared.” Yes, it had been two years and almost six months since she had been alive to the world. Mei prattled on about kidnapping and ransom but Olivia didn’t pay it much attention. Her mind was more focused on the time she had been dead and how best to get Akio back to the safety of his parents. 

“I am sorry. You must be in pain.” Just like she was in pain. “May I use your shower?”

“Bedroom’s through there. There are fresh towels.” She thanked Mei and went into the bathroom. She couldn’t be with Mei for much longer. She could already feel herself slipping to the monster inside her that now raged with anger at old wounds now torn open. She undressed and stepped into the frigid spray of water and heard herself sigh as it warmed. 

She washed quickly, her mind shutting down as her free hand drummed fingers on her thigh. The longer she spent with Mei, the more danger she put the woman in and she couldn’t have that. Her hands lingered on her scars, tracing them and remembering how each was earned. The electrical burn on her side, the tattoo on her back that reminded her of her sin and shame. She fingered the one below her eye. Slade had given it to her when he had her on the _Amazo_ and hit her repeatedly. Her mind coughed up a memory through the tapping of one of the times when she had been allowed to pass out from the pain for longer than a few minutes. She had woken up in a soft bed with hands and a piece of damp cloth on her face. Gentle hands wiping the blood away and cleaning the cuts. She knew those hands that were rough with callouses as well as she knew her own. She groaned when Slade pressed a bit too hard and his hands left her in a flash. Her hands moved to her stomach as she thought of the baby she had lost. She didn’t care about how it happened; only that it was inevitably her fault. She walked back out in her freshly laundered clothes she had come in with and looked at the infuriated look on Mei’s face. 

“I saw the tattoo on your back.” _Fuck._ “I need to know what happened to my family.” She winced; she didn’t want to tell Mei this painful truth. 

“I don’t know.” When Mei didn’t believe her, she tried again. “Believe me when I tell you that the less you know about me, the safer you will be.” 

“Maybe you will be more honest with the police.” _Double fuck._

“I understand you’re upset. Please don’t call them.” 

“Too late. They’ll be here any minute.” _Triple fuck. God really had it in for her today._

“Akio, we have to go.” She said as she surveyed the surrounding area. No noises out of place or shadows at the window. Until she saw red laser sights on the wall. She barely had enough time to pull all   
three of them to the floor before the shooting started. 

“Why are the police shooting?” 

“Because; police, they ain’t!” she rolled her eyes at the woman. Akio was now in danger because of this moron. She should leave this woman to her fate and worry about Shado and Yao Fei hating her in the afterlife later. But, her fucking humanity refused to allow her to move and leave the woman behind. When the gunfire stopped she check Akio over, finding nothing she barked at Mei to take Akio to the bedroom and to stay below the windows. 

Gunfire proceeded to stop and start up again as the masked gunman entered and got into position. She jumped up to rush the first and bat him aside. Adrenaline and her beast out in full force giving her strength she shouldn’t have. Kicking the other away, she held onto her prey and used him for leverage as she gave a roundhouse to the one she kicked. The man held her tightly as he forced them back, smashing her back into several vases and then into the floor. Shards dug into her back with claws and she growled in annoyance at the pain. He hit her twice in the stomach before she kicked at his knee and destabilized him enough to toss him into a vase and strike his throat. She swung at her and she ducked and grabbed a heavy piece of ceramic, breaking it over his head. She spun to face the other when a gunshot rang out and he dropped to the floor. She turned to see Maseo with a gun and Tatsu jumped down and sliced the other in half. 

“Akio?! Akio?!” Akio ran out of his hiding place and into his mother’s arms. She cocked her head at the sight. The beast prowling around inside her.

 _How stupid… there could be more…_ she grinned wickedly and approached. Maseo stepped in between them and she snarled at him. 

“Happy you’re back.” She smiled again. Maseo took one step toward her. 

“You won’t go near them right now. Not till you’re calm.” The hell was he talking about? She was calm. Mei walked out and looked at the damage. She growled, this was her fault. Akio wouldn’t have been in danger had it not been for her. She moved towards her, fists curling and uncurling. Maseo moved between them and she growled at him again. 

“She-”

“Is Shado’s sister. Yao Fei’s daughter. Remember them?” the fuck did that matter? She put Akio in danger. She put a child in danger! 

“So. What.”

“Are you going to be the monster they tried to keep you from being?” he asked. That sent ice water crashing through her brain. She stopped, wide eyed and frozen. Chains and locks coiled around her beast like scarves. 

_What was I about to do?_ She wondered even though she knew the answer. She lowered her head in shame and tapped at her leg. Maseo grabbed her hand and shook his head.

“Face it, Livvy. Control it. You can do it.” He spoke softly. She nodded but kept her head down. She asked if they could give her and Mei a minute before they left her. 

“I’m sorry, Mei.” She said softly.

“They tried to kill us.” She winced; she had wanted to avoid this. 

“They weren’t the police.” 

“You knew my sister. Is there any chance-” Mei grew frantic. Sitting down across from her and looking into the woman’s familiar face. 

“This had nothing to do with Shado.”

“You have no idea what it’s like… looking for any kind of answer.” She steeled herself because, otherwise, she wouldn’t be able to get through her next few sentences. 

“I knew them both. _Loved_ them both. They saved my life. And the people after me will hurt anyone who knows too much about me.” 

“But Shado and my Father-”

“Mei.” She said roughly and swallowed. “They’re gone.” Mei began to cry but said the strangest thing.

“Thank you. I just wanted to know the truth.” She looked away from the familiar face. She left the woman to her mourning and hugged Tatsu and Maseo close. She didn’t know who was shaking but the three of them trembled. 

She sat with Maseo as they cleaned and reloaded the guns in an apartment owned by an older woman who owed Maseo a debt. The question remained of what they were going to do. Waller had men looking for them and this older woman would no doubt flip on them the second pain was even mentioned. She grabbed a gun and cocked it, placing it in the thigh holster and strapping on her quiver and bow and, finally, the green hood she was unworthy of. She would find Waller and put a top to this, once and for all.

“You can’t break into ARGUS by yourself.” She really needed to find the time to work on that habit. 

“I can and I will.” 

“No.” Maseo said firmly. She looked at him and Tatsu sadly. 

“I can’t let you come with. I need my monster, Maseo. I can’t let you talk me down this time.” He handed her his pass card, she smiled and left. Sitting on the roof of a nearby building as she breathed deep and began to unlock her monster piece by piece. She thought of Wintergreen and his torture of her. The assault she lived through at the hands of Fyers men when she went back for Yao Fei. She allowed herself to remember every detail about Yao Fei and Shado’s deaths. Finally, she forced herself to focus only on Slade’s betrayal. She let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding and opened her eyes as she drew up the hood. She smiled and laughed into the night, blood singing in her veins and her demon roaring with need. 

_And so… the game begins. Ready or not, Waller, here I come._

The building that house ARGUS was empty. No one came or went as she entered. No one came near her and the only footsteps she heard were hers. She entered the room she had been tortured in and couldn’t help but smile. She turned when she heard footsteps and saw a military man in his fatigues. How odd but how wonderfully delicious. She moved to shoot him but before she could pull the trigger, someone shot him twice from behind. The man fell to the floor and she cocked her head. Very disappointing. Waller staggered down the stairs with and arm to her bloody side. 

“They’ve been holding me here for weeks.” She staggered closer and used a support beam to hold herself up. 

“Look at him. He’s Army, not ARGUS.” She dropped her gun as a show of good faith but she didn’t drop hers. 

“And your point is?” She grinned at Waller. Oh, the things she could do to this spineless snake. No one would know and nor would they care. Waller’s eyes widened and she realized she had said that out loud. 

“He targeted you and the Yamashiro’s for death. He plans to unleash the Alpha/Omega on Hong Kong.” Interesting, that would need to be dealt with. Maseo and his family were in Hong Kong and would die because of Shrieve. 

“His team developed a vaccine.” She grinned wider and approached Waller.

“Well, I guess it’s your lucky day then.” She lifted her gun and clicked the safety back on. When she got back to the apartment, she waited on the balcony. She knew Maseo had seen her come here and would, as they had agreed, wait for him to talk her back into relative sanity before allowing her near Akio. She told him and Tatsu what Waller had told her and that, surprisingly, she believed the snake. They had a small window of time in which to escape because Shrieve was going to have to release the virus soon if he wanted to pin it on the Triad. The problem of the day being that Shrieve had men everywhere and more resources than Waller, which was a frightening though in and of itself. 

“He’s made it so that we can’t escape.” Tatsu said. 

“Well, we can’t run. So let’s go steal some vaccine.” The mad grin was already started to spread across her face at the thought of how much she would get to play in doing so. They grabbed her hands and squeezed, calming her instantly as they drew her attention to Akio. 

“He has to have it somewhere in Hong Kong.”

Shrieve’s base of operations wasn’t your typical army base, but rather an abandoned warehouse in a shady part of town. She walked in first, and grabbed the military man as he passed by and choked him with a hiss in his ear to be quiet. She pressed her lips to his throat so he could feel her cruel smile. She gave him the option of unconscious or dead, and he gave up the information. She thanked him an instant before napping his neck and moved him to a secluded corner where he wouldn’t be noticed. A bubble of laughter left her and she ignored the matching looks of fear on her companion’s faces. They got to the lab that housed the vaccine and she took it as they watched the door. Exiting through the vent shaft after she snagged a phone from the table just as a military man came in and moved his flashlight around. 

Back in the apartment, which took hours to get too because they took the long way to ensure they weren’t followed, she nosed through the phone she stole as Maseo prepared the vaccine. He opened a box which held only four syringes. Not enough for granny who housed them and kept them fed. She showed them the phone which laid out the details for Shrieve’s plan to distribute the virus. The plan was for them to take the vaccine then the Yamashiro’s would get the fuck out of Dodge. But Tatsu had to go and say something foolishly noble. 

“You won’t stop them. We will.” If she was in her right frame of mind and had been drinking, the liquid would have been all over the carpet. 

“What kind of example are we setting for our son if we have a hope to save thousands and only save ourselves?”   
“You need to leave. I won’t be responsible for your wellbeing.” She hissed. Tatsu was being stupid. She had a son; she should be running with him now. Maseo grabbed her chin and forced her to look at the sleeping forms of Akio and the old woman. It both calmed and enraged her. They should be running. 

“Let us help you.” Tatsu said. Maseo didn’t agree with his wife but, in the end, he relented after they were inoculated. 

Finding Shrieve and his men was a lot easier than it should have been. They were hiding out in a different warehouse than when she had grabbed the vaccines but it was within the same lot. Idiot needed pointers on hiding. She, Tatsu, and Maseo were hidden a small ways away from the rogue military by a high stack of metal tubing. She watched them through binoculars as they unloaded large plastic crates from one truck and stacked them by another. Several men milling about near a noodle cart. Even Shrieve was there, combining the Alpha and Omega by hand. She handed Maseo the binoculars and slipped away silently, her bow and gun at the ready as she moved to steal them a car. Well, borrow it. 

Following the truck was just as easy as finding Shrieve. Even in the dense streets of Hong Kong, it wasn’t rocket science to find a hulking military vehicle. Three of the four men in the back of the truck lined up along the edge and began firing at them. Maseo popped his head and arm out of the window and returned fire, pushing the military men back. She barked at him to take the wheel. The beast wouldn’t be let loose this time, she needed a clear head to remember why she was fighting. She hopped up onto the roof from the open sunroof and fired off a few rounds, rolling off and onto the trunk as the bullets inched closer to her frame. Holding on to the spoiler as her sneakers slid across the wet asphalt, Maseo continued to fire. Using the opening to climb up the car and jump into the back of the truck. 

Tossing one out of the truck and out of the way so Maseo wouldn’t have to swerve to avoid the rolling body. Swinging her torso back to avoid a punch, she grabbed his arm and flipped him over and away into the back of the truck. Kicking away the gun of the second, she struck his jaw then that of the third who fell out of the truck in effort to regain his balance. Two down, two to go. The one closest to the front of the truck, swung at her and she redirected his hits. He ducked under her swing and she twisted her body to keep her momentum going to nail the other in the jaw. The one who ducked grabbed her arm and threw them away, causing her to drop to her knees to keep her balance. The driver jerked the wheel and she fell into the side and stars filled her vision as she hit her head on the metal siding. One of the goons hauled her up by her neck and brought a gun towards her, she pushed at that hand but he was slightly stronger. A long blade poked through the canvas and skewered the goon. That blade was awfully close to her face. 

“Looked like you could use a hand.” Tatsu laughed. She punched the last one in the stomach and grabbed his arm, flipping them both over. She pinned him by straddling his shoulder as she brought his arm up against her chest. Pushing half of the arm down and it broke and dislocated all in one. Her beast purred in satisfaction when he screamed. She left him to roll on the bed and quickly opened the metal briefcase. 

_Fucking empty…_


	20. Episode 20: The Black Death

Tatsu stopped the truck and she jumped out helping Maseo drag the only nearby survivor from it and tossing him aside. She hopped back in a search everywhere; the bodies, loose boards in the bed, compartments. There was nothing. Tatsu walked over to the military man and raised her sword to his neck, demanding the location of the bioweapon. The man spit at her feet. Tatsu lowered her sword from his neck to his chest. Traveling the blade lower as he continued to remain silent. Olivia wrapped her arms around herself and shook as the willpower she had to keep herself locked in place began to wane. She wanted to beat that man. Craved to make him bleed until he gave up all of his little secrets. Maseo rubbed her arms in a soothing motion and her muscles relaxed slightly.

“It’s in the food cart.” 

“Where is the food cart?” 

“Street market.” Tatsu moved to kill the man, to keep him from calling Shrieve but stopped when Olivia put her hand on her shoulder. Mechanically she straddled the man’s waist, a small smile on her face. Cradling his face in her tiny hands, gentle and almost loving. Moving her lips to his ear, she whispered to him. 

“For all the pain you were going to cause, you don’t deserve a quick death. But that’s okay. See, I know how to do this right.” She leaned back with a cruel smile and twisted his neck. There was relief in his eyes at the prospect of a quick and painless death. Then, as it dawned on him that his neck was broken and he couldn’t breathe, that relief was replaced with fear. She got off of him and got into the back seat of the car. It was the farthest she could get away from Tatsu and Maseo. 

As they moved through the crowded streets, looking for the food cart she had seen at Shrieve’s base of operations. Tatsu and Maseo were behind her, talking in low tones. She wasn’t entirely sure what they were talking about, but the sour look on Maseo’s face was a good indicator. He was still unsure of what they were doing. They were putting Akio in danger by letting him stay in Hong Kong even though he was inoculated. They were putting him at risk of being an orphan if they died. She split off from them after warning them she was doing so. She couldn’t be near them right now. Not when her inner monster was so close to the surface. 

On one side street, she spotted a man in plain clothes but with a com wire trailing down his neck. He looked at her then over to the noodle cart guy that had been feeding Shrieve’s men. She pulled the gun from her hip and yelled for him to stop as he began to unscrew the cap of the bioweapon. The man she had made drew his gun and turned it on her, people saw and screamed in terror and ran. They fired off several shots at each other and she knew that Tatsu and Maseo had heard them and would rush to help her. She ran forward, knocking innocents out of the way and sending a bullet straight into the heart of the man who made her. Another stood by a brightly light, neon sign. He clipped Maseo in the arm and Tatsu rushed him and sliced him in half. 

“Give me the vial!” she barked at the noodle cart man. He was hunkered down behind it for cover. Damn it all, she couldn’t shoot him. The vial was no doubt glass and the shock of a dropping body could break it and undo the work they had done to keep the virus from being unleashed. 

“ _Go to Hell._ ” The man snapped in Chinese and kicked her gun away. 

She swung her fist at him and he leaned back to avoid the hit. Kicking her several times in the torso and forcing the air from her lungs. On her knees, she did her best to block and redirect his hits until Tatsu or Maseo could help her. She grabbed his arm and drug him to the ground, grabbing the vial and bolting. He caught her ankle and she went down. Smacking her face against the concrete she twisted and elbowed him in the face as he moved on top of her. He grabbed her arm on the second his and pulled it back until it popped out of place and took the vial from her hand. She bent forward, snapping her arm back in and pulling him with her. Flipping them over, he got to his feet first and gave a vicious roundhouse kick to her temple. 

Bouncing on the balls of his feet like it was Mortal Combat; she tackled him into a table and snagged the vial back. Scrambling away from him she turned to catch him jumping and swinging at her. The hit knocked her off her feet and the air left her in a rush as she landed. The vial went end over end in the air and she could only watch and weakly throw her hand out to catch it. The sound of it breaking was like a million nails on a chalk board. 

_What have I done?_

Within minutes, the city descended into chaos. The virus going airborne as it evaporated from the concrete. It took only seconds of breathing in the toxic air for the virus to tear apart a person’s body. Blood leaked from mouths and noses. People just dropped like flies. And it was all. Her. Fault! Maseo tried to tell her otherwise but, in the end, it was her who had released the virus. Shrieve had set out to do so and she to stop it. She failed and now was just as guilty as he was. They walked back to the apartment that Akio was hiding in, weapons drawn and moving in arcs to keep people at bay. It was morning by the time they had only a handful of blocks left to go when a crowd of people were clamoring around a truck with two men in yellow hazmat suits stood in the back. 

But there was no cure for the virus, only an inoculation that was useless after exposure. The two men in the hazmat suits grabbed arms and pressed metallic objects to the skin. Those people weren’t getting the cure they hoped for. They were being injected with the virus and becoming carriers. She walked over to the truck and fired off three shots into the air. Sending the throng of people scattering like ants. The Army that was guarding the truck hunkered down and fired back. It was hard to tell if people were falling dead due to the virus or the bullets flying through the air. She covered Tatsu from behind a van as she moved to the truck. She got up to help when she was grabbed from behind and held in a hold she wasn’t familiar with. The sound of a blade singing through the air echoed loud in her ears and the weight on her back vanished. 

“I had him.”

“Sure you did.” Tatsu rolled her eyes. They set fire to the truck and the virus inside with explosives. Hoping the high temperature would be enough to kill it. When they got back to the apartment, the old woman who was kind enough to open her home to them was dead on the floor. Akio shouted and ran to his father. 

“We need to leave.” Tatsu said.

“But Shrieve-”

“Will have enough to worry about. The chaos will give us cover.” Olivia cut Maseo off. It was nightfall by the time they found a car with both keys and a full tank of gasoline. 

Akio began to bleed from his mouth soon after and spiked a fever shortly after that that refused to break. All around the streets, people were either dead or dying. The lucky few making a mad dash to get anywhere that was safe. They ducked into a pharmacy the next morning. Prescription strength medicine might break Akio’s fever. She stood off to the side as Maseo and Tatsu kneeled over him, trying to get him to take medicine. Why wasn’t the inoculant working? It should be working!

“He’s young. His immunes system isn’t strong enough.” Maseo said. Tatsu cradled him in her arms as he spoke softly in Japanese. Even though he was a boy, he was a smart boy and he understood what was happening. Maseo jumped up from his spot as Tatsu began singing to their son. She grabbed his arm, and stopped him from leaving. 

“I want to kill that bastard just as much as you do. But right now you need to focus on your son.” 

“They made a vaccine, maybe they made a cure.” He looked frantic. In so much pain. “I know it’s unlikely, but I have to try.” She sighed. 

“Stay here. I’ll bring you Shrieve.” She looked over at Tatsu and Akio. Focusing only on the child. It could have been hers. Shrieve was to blame. He was the monster here. He deserved to die. As the thoughts pinged around her mind like a hockey puck, the chains came undone. Tapping into that dark part of her that craved bloodshed and thrived on the pain of others. She let out a laugh and pulled up the green hood on her back. 

She found the abandoned warehouse that Shrieve had used to house the inoculant and skirted its outside. She rounded a corner and two men in military fatigues held out their hands in a stopping motion. She laughed as she shot two arrows, one buried in their chests. She stood above them with a mile wide grin on her face. Inside the warehouse was like a maze but it had plenty of sharp corners she could hide behind. She picked them off one by one from the rafters she’d climbed into and, oh, did she make it hurt. Allowing them to scream out in delicious agony as the stone arrow heads ripped their flesh apart. They tried to shoot at her but they mostly missed, she was too well hidden in the darkness. She jumped down at the end of a hall and let off an arrow that sunk deep into the chest of the last gunman. Kicking the door open, she entered to see Shrieve sitting at a desk like he hadn’t a care in the world. She cocked her head as he continued to sit and stare at her. Growling in annoyance, she stalked over to him. He hid his fear well but not well enough. She could smell it. _Taste_ it. 

“General. So happy to have caught you. We need to talk.” She giggled as she drew back her bowstring. 

“You made quite the entrance.” 

“Well, I do aim to please. Since I’ve impressed you, can I have the cure? Pretty please?” 

“China owns enough of our national debt to decimate our economy. All without firing a single shot.” She let the arrow fly into his arm. 

“Cure. Now.” He gestured towards the safe next to her, giving her the passcode. She saw the vials and syringe. “So glad you see it my way,   
General.” 

“You’ll need to deliver it in the exact ratio I give you. You may wanna write this down.” She grabbed her stomach as she doubled over in laughter. When she regained control, she hauled him up his shirt collar. 

“No can do, punkin. If this doesn’t work then I have some people who will just die to meet you.” She giggled. But by the time she got him back to the pharmacy with the cure, Akio was dead. And Shrieve, wonderful idiot that he is, spoke up.

“He was dead the moment he was exposed.”

“But the cure-” Maseo said brokenly. 

“There isn’t one.” 

“Then what did I bring with?” she asked as she cocked her head. 

“Insulin. I’m diabetic.” She moved to jab an arrow into his eye but stopped when she noticed the laser sights on her chest. She growled, annoyed and pissed. Her heart thundered in her ears, blood roaring in her veins, teeth locked tight to keep the laughter inside as her adrenaline and demon worked to push her past the point of no return. Shrieve was talking but she didn’t track it. Akio is dead. Akio is dead and it’s his fault. She lunged at him and took him to the floor, slamming her fist into his face. Not one single thing mattered aside from her need for vengeance. She, in   
her darkness, could give that to Maseo and Tatsu.

When she was sure he wasn’t going anywhere she looked behind her. Dead military men on the floor. She drew her bow and shot one in the shoulder, she pushed him back and tore it free and stabbed the second with it. Knocking the third off his feet with a sweep from her bow and hitting him with it for good measure. She picked up the arrow and shot Shrieve in the leg with it. He groaned and she tsked at him. This just would not do. She looked at the family she had befriended and failed in the course of a year. 

“Leave.” They didn’t need to be asked twice. Alone with Shrieve she whistled a joyful tune as she searched around for a toolbox and something to use as a chair. She dropped her supplies just out of his reach and knelt by him, twisting the arrow in his leg. 

“General… you and I need to be better acquainted.” She laughed as he howled. She reached into the toolbox and pulled out a pair of pliers. Grabbing his mouth and forcing it open she stuck the pliers in and clamped them around a tooth. 

“I’ve seen this in movies. You’ll have to tell me if it hurts as bad as it looks.” And she pulled. His screams echoed in the store and she shivered in pleasure at the sound. Was it her or was it the demon inside? 

_Who the fuck cares? He deserves it!_ The darkness snarled. The tooth came free and he groaned, blood falling from his mouth like a small waterfall. She then grabbed a hand saw and took three of his fingers. He tried to fight her off; she snarled at him and laid him flat. Shooting an arrow into his shoulders and pinning him to the floor. 

“Now. Will you cooperate?” she grabbed his hand, the one with the fingers, and clamped the pliers on the nail. 

“I’ve always wondered if this was as easy as it appeared.” She pulled hard, the nail tearing loose but only half of it. His screams brought joy to her now icy heart. 

“I guess that was too hard? What do you think?” he spat blood in her face.

“All this? For one kid?! One worthless kid?!” she let the blood drip down her cheek and smiled at him. 

“No… not for just one…” she pulled another nail, gently this time. “For everyone who has died in the last two days.” She dropped the pliers and grabbed a hammer. Bringing it down on his knee. 

“And… you make a pretty good substitute for the one I really want.” She laughed. When she was finally done, and the All-American-Hero was dead, she sat back on the overturned bucket and dropped the bloody hammer as Tatsu and Maseo came in. A feminine voice called her name in horror, but she continued to stare at the body. She looked at his face, what was left of it anyway. 

_Gonna be hard to identify him now._ She grinned. 

“Olivia, what have you done?” a male voice asked her and the beast settled down. Her body rocked with tremors as that familiar ice water rushed through her and she realized what she had done. Exactly how far off the deep end she let herself fall from. 

“He failed this city… and I’m giving him the justice he deserves… what the people he’s killed deserve.” She turned and looked Maseo in the eye. Both of them left the pharmacy and she followed discreetly. 

“All I know is that I wasn’t strong enough to save our son… or to do what Olivia did.” 

“What she did was horrible.” She winced at Tatsu’s words. She tried to fight the monster inside. She didn’t want to be that kind of thing. She _wasn’t_ that thing. For what he had done to Akio, it was justice. It wasn’t wrong. 

“I am without a soul, Tatsu.”

“Only if you abandon your wife when she needs you most.” 

“When I look into your eyes… I see my son’s.” Maseo turned and walked away from them both. She looked down at her hands, stained with blood but it didn’t look like the generals blood. It looked like Akio’s. Shado and Slade were wrong about her. She didn’t use the darkness to stay alive or to get vengeance for another. She simply was darkness. She was a monster. 

The next morning, she saw Tatsu safely on a boat bound for her hometown in Japan. It was the very least she could do for the woman. When Tatsu asked where she was going, she honestly had no idea. All she knew was that she was a monster, the island made her that way. She couldn’t let it anywhere near her mother or brother. Her friends. She wanted to fulfill her father’s wish. To go home and save their city but how could she do that as she was now? Without Maseo and Tatsu, without Akio there was no one else to help her corral it. She said goodbye to Tatsu, stepping back when the woman went to hug her, and got onto another boat. One bound for Coast City. 

For months after the bioweapon massacre in China she had failed to stop, she made her home in Coast City. Home being a relative term; she slept in alleys and roofs, stole food from stores or from trash cans, and when she couldn’t sleep she stalked the rooftops. Her bow, arrows, and green hood always on or near her. If she found anyone doing evil things, she put a stop to it in whatever way was fitting for the crime. For instance, the drug dealer she was currently chasing across the roof of an industrial building. Six people had died from the crank he sold; it was their choice to use but he had been lacing his stash with dangerous things. She intended to show him exactly how dangerous those chemicals were. Except, she missed her footing on the gravel topped roof and slid right off the side and getting tangled up in several power lines. The blurry form of a dark skinned woman drew close to her. She growled.

“Interesting hobby, Miss Queen.” _Amanda-Fucking-Waller._


	21. Episode 21: You Can Never Leave

Amanda Waller in a three piece suit was an odd sight in a Coast City dive bar. But here she was and so was Olivia. Waller paid for all her drinks, which was fine by her, and actually drank with her. No one paid them any attention which mad her wonder exactly how many of the people in the bar were civilians and normal workers. Which begged the question of how the fuck the head of ARGUS managed to find her. 

“The world is far too small for someone like you to disappear in.” great, she asked that out loud and still didn’t get a straight answer. “I expected to find you in Starling.” 

_Hah! That was a laugh. Like she wanted to be near her family…_

“Because of what you did to Shrieve?” 

“What do you want Amanda?” 

“To help you.” That made her laugh out loud. “You are running from your family because you feel like a monster. Trying to channel your killer instinct into something productive.” Well didn’t that just hit the nail on the head? 

“I don’t need a therapist, Amanda.” 

“The hood and eye make-up suggest otherwise.” She may have a point there. Who the fuck was she kidding? She knew she was spiraling, and she welcomed it. Secretly hoping that one of these times she’d take a tumble wrong and die. Just so she could go to hell and pay for her crimes, or hopefully, see Slade and Shado in heaven. 

“Stop trying to run from it.” She turned to Waller and her vision went sideways. Everyone in the bar got up and walked towards them with purpose. She got up to run but lost her balance and crashed into the bar stool she was sitting in. Seconds later she was out cold. She woke up again on a cargo plane with only two others with her. Not surprisingly, Waller wasn’t there. They tossed her a back pack and a parachute which she strapped on without a word. Waller was only half correct, she was running but it wasn’t away from the monster. It was towards it and the inevitable death that would be sure to follow. One of the agents opened the hatch and she looked at the tiny island she knew very well. 

_I’m home…_ she thought. Mission was simple; get in, assess, and report. Piece of cake and she sure hoped she’d be able to kill something for all the trouble. With a deep breath, she jumped. Tucking and rolling when she landed, she groaned. She opened the chute a little too late and the impact hit her hard. She stood on shaky legs and turned around to find, the butt of a rifle in her brain. 

“Who are you?” the man in camouflage asked. In an instant, her beast surged and her blood turned to lightning in her veins. 

_Luck, be my lady tonight._ She giggled. She pushed up to her knees and held her hands up as if she were being arrested. 

Quickly twisting and pushing the gun away from anything vital, giving the male a very nasty shot to the balls. Jumping up and catching him around his middle, she slammed him back down to the ground with enough force to break a few ribs. It was such a lovely sound. The male recovered and drew a knife and sliced at her. Side-stepping out of range and pulling his knife from him as she stabbed him. Up and under the sternum. Damn thing was a bitch to get through even with a sharp blade. His breath gurgled and she dropped him, watching as he died quickly. Picking up the body by the ankles, she drug him through the brush. No reason for him to be found just yet and she had the perfect place to hide him. She ripped a few pieces of his uniform free and stuffed them in her pockets. 

There was a cavern underneath the ground by the trees over to her left that connected to the cave she had called home for her first six months on this island. Dropping the body through the crack she opened her pack and took out the com system. She could be a bitch and type something rude but she didn’t, too much energy. The message was received and responded to quickly. They wanted her to infiltrate some group that was based on the island. Pretty fucking easy. Waller needed to pay her more for this bullshit. She tossed a rock onto a landmine and scattered the bits of cloth around. 

Moving through the forest was easy, even though she hadn’t really seen it in a year and a half. When she heard noises that did not belong to the native wildlife, she dropped down low and pulled out the binoculars they had given her. Looking through them she saw something… straight out of a history special. Fences made out of sticks and vines, houses made of the same with dried grass roofs, all next to a field of purple wild flowers. People were in the field, working with the flowers when an armed guard came up behind a woman and hauled her up by the hair. She ran back to the hiding place of her latest victim and dropped the pack and her jacket. Ripping up her shirt and smearing dirt all over her and in her hair. 

Getting caught by the men was also very easy and it made her wonder exactly where people learned to become mercenaries. It was amazing to see what a few tears did to people. They walked her to the camp and to the largest structure. Unlike her first meeting with Fyers, the dark skinned man in charge knew exactly who she was and offered her a seat rather than forcing her into it. She turned on the tears and the _oh-so-very-grateful_ smile stretched her patience thin. 

“I’m sorry, but we’re not rescuing you.” 

“Wh-what? B-b-but why?” 

“First thing you do when you get home is you tell people what we’re doing here.” Well, that was the mission. “good news, I have no reason to kill you.” 

“Wh-what are you going to do t-t-to me?” she backed into her chair for good measure. The man in charge was going to be a hard sell on the trust thing. 

“You survived here, alone, for three years. That requires intelligence and fortitude. I have need of those qualities.”

_Well, actually, I wasn’t alone nor am I that smart. But he didn’t need to know that._

“As it happens, one of my men stepped on a landmine.” She smirked inwardly. He held his hand out and she took it hesitantly. 

_Infiltration complete and it hasn’t even been an hour._ Waller would be off of her back in no time. 

First, they had her guard the people working in the flowers. Idiots even gave her a gun but the work was hard. She wasn’t blind to the people or their needs but she forced herself to not acknowledge it. Even as a man collapsed and the woman she saw earlier ran to his side and begged for water for him. She barked at them to keep working, adjusting the gun in her hands and everyone got the hint. When one man bolted one afternoon, she saw a chance to get the men to trust her a little more. She ran after him, colliding with him on the side and taking him to the ground. The armed men congratulated her and actually apologized for calling her a rich-bitch. When the guard approached she looked over at him, a steady hand on the man’s shoulder. 

“Punishment is what? Or do I get to decide?” the guard smirked and told her to do what she felt was good enough. She smiled and wrenched the runner’s hair back. 

“Sorry.” She whispered to him before walking around to face him and smack him with the butt of her gun. Her lips twitched into a smile as the crack echoed in the otherwise quiet field. They hauled the man up and dragged him away, in front of all the others just so they got the message. The guard with her talked, and she only paid attention to the important bits. 

“What is the product? Reiter hasn’t told me.” 

“Calls it Slam, genetically modified whatever, one part heroin poppy one part coca leaf.” Waller wouldn’t have sent her here over drugs and human slavery. Another guard ran up to them and told them that some of the drugs were missing. She helped round up the workers, putting them on their knees before Conklin. The guard who spoke to her about the drugs. He prattled on about them being a team and how he couldn’t trust them now. She wanted to roll her eyes; the man was a blowhard who just liked to hear himself talk. When no one took the blame, he shot the runner. He was going to shoot another but she stopped him. 

“Your violence doesn’t seem to be working.”

“What do you suggest? Harsh language?” he and his buddies laughed. 

“I learned a lot on this island. So why don’t you let me try?” She picked up the man Conklin had been about to shoot and put him in a chair in full view of the others. Tying his hands to the legs, she asked with a smile if he was comfortable. When he said nothing she drew a knife and plunged it into his leg, just above his knee. Her beast shivered when he screamed.

“Which fancy school you pick this up in?” asked Conklin. 

“Here. Been here three years and been hurt in ways you can’t even imagine.” She twisted the knife as she pulled it out and trailed the tip up his chest. “I know what kills, what cripples, and what just hurts.” 

“Stop! Stop!” a female shouted. “I took it! The workers were in pain!” 

“Where is it?”

“Used up. Kill me if you want.” Stupid woman. She put her hand on Conklin’s arm, telling him that Reiter wouldn’t be happy about a thin workforce. 

“He’d make an exception for a thief.” The woman had only the welfare of others in mind. That was her only crime. The human part of her wanted to save the stupid female and she found herself speaking before she thought better of it. 

“How about I make her disappear? I know just where to go so they won’t find a scrap of clothing.” Conklin pondered her suggestion for a moment then relented, telling one of the other guards to come with. Now, her rescue attempt was even more complicated. As if convincing the woman she meant no harm wasn’t enough. 

She walked with the woman a half step in front of her, hands bound behind her. The other guard was several feet behind them. The woman told her the man’s name, the one who had died. Name’s didn’t matter to her, only survival and finishing the mission so Waller would get off her back and maybe let her go. She barked at the woman to walk faster. Then the idiot accused her of enjoying the torture she inflicted and she was tempted to kill the woman and save herself the headache. 

“Trying to put some distance between us, so will you hurry up?” she hissed at the prisoner. 

“Between us and Richards?” 

“No. Between us and-” an explosion echoed behind them. “that.” She helped the woman up and undid the rope that held her. The woman looked both scared and confused. She guided them both to a safe place, well removed from the labor camp but close enough for her to get to. A place, she knew well. The cave she and Yao Fei had shared. Yes, he was no longer father; she didn’t deserve to call him such. She set the woman inside the cave and began to go through the same motions of teaching her how to stay hidden and alive the same as Yao Fei had taught her. Don’t light a fire until after nightfall, fresh water was at the base of the hill they were on, and edible plants fifty feet north, do not eat the red berries, and above all, do not get caught. 

“Why do this for me?” million dollar question there.

“It’s complicated.” Close enough to the truth, she supposed. 

“They might think I am dead but they will come looking for you.” 

“No, they won’t. I’ll be going back once I am sure you’re not going to do something stupid.” 

“I know these men. They have history and you are not one of them.” Her accent was the same as Anatoli’s, meaning she had to be Russian. 

“Oh, I know. That’s why you are going to help me. And no, you won’t like it.” The fear returned to the Russian woman’s face and she couldn’t help but smile. 

_That’s right. Be afraid… the more you’re afraid of me the farther you’ll get from me._ She thought. 

She jogged back to the labor camp in the rain, letting her breath come in short gasps to ensure it looked like she had a hard time. She schooled her features as she came up to Conklin and another man. She assured them that she caught the runaway and made sure her ghost would remember not to be so stupid in the next life. They asked about the explosions and she said that Richards had stepped on one with a shrug of her shoulders. Conklin, however, was angry with her. 

“Been here a few months and never had a problem. Now two of ours get hit by landmines.” Conklin was one of _those_ soldiers. Drawing connections where there were none. Richards stepped on a landmine of his own free will and the other she had killed one her own. 

“So?” she narrowed her eyes. She was a survivor on this island for years, being wary of others would be normal. 

“It means I wanna see her.” She smiled at him, wicked and cruel.

“Sure. You got the stomach for it?” she walked away with him trailing not far behind. 

“So how’d you do it? How’d you kill her?” he asked after a while. 

“Strangled her.” He cocked a brow at her.

“You said it was memorable.” 

“You asked how I killed her. Not what came before that.” She giggled at him. 

“You act like this wasn’t your first kill.” No, it wasn’t her first. People had been on this island before her and when they found her, they did all manner of depraved things to her. She still had the scars to prove it. And she healed and she learned and she paid them back for each ounce of pain. Maybe she went overboard at times but it was still deserved. Conklin stopped walking and looked at her with something akin to fear in his eyes. 

“You’re a fucking monster.” She smiled at him. “That’s why Reiter recruited you. You are one dark bitch.” 

“Maybe I am.” 

“But you’re afraid of it.” She turned to look him in the eye. He was afraid of her, his eyes showed her that much. But only because he deemed her to be a bigger monster than him and that made her terrified of herself. She growled as they entered Yao Fei’s cave, this asshole did not deserve to be here. On one of the rock platforms, was the woman. Sprawled out with bright red blood on her chest and rips in her clothes. Conklin pressed to fingers to her neck and smiled at her.

“Like I said… a monster.” 

“Satisfied?” 

“Very. Get rid of the body. Cave might be useful.” When Conklin left she crouched next to Taiana and restored her to life. This technique was hard and one misstep and she would have died for sure. She asked where she had learned that and she smiled fondly at the memories.

“I wasn’t always alone on this island.” 

The days after repeated in much the same manner, not quite how it was with Slade but similar. She woke, ate, and watched people work. But Conklin never left her side except when he absolutely had to which made her uneasy. One day, he hopped out of a truck and held up the pack Waller had given her. He hauled her into Reiter’s structure when she told him she had no idea what it was. He took her gun and set it far from her fingers.

“We have a mole.”

“And you believe it to be Miss Queen?” she really hated people calling her that. 

“We’ve been here eight months without a single problem. She shows up and we lose two guys and drugs go missing.” 

“Fine, you got me. I parachuted in on secret spy mission.” She laughed.

“Perhaps if you were focusing on external threats you would have found this man spying on us.” 

“Wasn’t spying, mate.” Reiter backhanded the blond man on the ground in front of her hard enough to twist him around. Waller wouldn’t have sent her back-up already.

The man’s name was John Constantine and Reiter tasked her with finding what he was after because she recognized the landmarks on the old map he had with him. Conklin voiced his displeasure, but Reiter didn’t really pay him any attention. Reiter was on her side, which made her life easier. Reiter saw the com unit and assumed it was his, and she had never given him reason to distrust her. The man started whispering in another language that she did not attribute to Chinese or Russian. Conklin approached the man with a laugh and asked if he was praying, the blond just smirked and held up his now free hands. He punched Conklin and tossed him aside and held a gun to her head, barking for Reiter to drop his gun and kiss the ground. Bringing her along with him as he left. 

_You really do hate me don’t you, God?_ She thought with a snarl.


	22. Episode 22: Old As The World

She drove them to the spot she knew to be the same on the map, arguing with John the whole way there. Yes, she knew where she was going. Yes, she was sure it was the same place. No, she didn’t know about Reiter’s plans other than drug making. He eventually stopped pointing the gun at her after she snapped at him about it. He picked up some leaves, after affirming that they were in the right place, and crunched them as he spoke odd words over them. Letting them fly, the winds shifted to whirl them around in a Devil’s wind and reveal a trap door built into the ground. 

_The fuck was that?_ She wondered. 

“What? You never seen magic before?” he asked with a smirk. 

“Bite me.” she growled at him as he opened the hatch.

“Well, go on then Alice. Down the rabbit hole you go.” He gave her a wink and she wanted to deck him in his smug face. The cavern was dark, her eyes refusing to adjust until he lit a nearby torch. 

“So… magic, huh? Must be exciting…” 

“Wonderful thing about magic, that.” 

“Care to explain then?” she rolled her eyes. 

“This is not a tunnel but a Ley Line. A river of primal magic. You see it as a tunnel because you saw a hole in the ground with a ladder.” She walked next to him and she had to admit, he looked good regardless of a split lip and the pungent smell of alcohol on him. And the tie looked really good on him, which immediately made her wonder what was wrong with him. Currently, she had been without sex since Slade and since she was only attracted to men like him. Dark men who did dark things. 

“Glad you like the view, love.” Heat stained her cheeks at his tone and she abruptly stopped walking. 

_What the hell is wrong with me?_ She embraced her inner monster and knew without a doubt that she was no good. Her beast shivered when   
she inflicted pain on others when top-side but in here, the beast was quiet and nonexistent. Tears stung her eyes as she remembered all the bad things she had done but it was fuzzy. Like it was a dream or a movie about someone else she was trying to recall. Strong hands gripped her shoulders and steadied her; John was right in front of her. 

“I…-”

“It’s different for you and I. It recognizes the difference between true evil and those who do evil in the name of survival or for the sake of others.”

“S-so I won’t…?” 

“No, love. Back up there you will be faced with doing those things again but you are no more damned for it than I am.” She didn’t notice as he cuffed her to a beam and moved behind the curtain in front of them. She shook herself and popped her thumb out of joint and slipped the cuffs, popping it back in as she rejoined him. 

“Yeah, I can do that trick too.” She laughed. 

“Clever girl.” In the center of the room was a stone pillar about half his height with a glowing red orb protruding from the center. He pulled   
it out and something overhead clicked. She looked up to see a spiked apparatus descend on him. She lunged at him and tackled him to the floor, landing wrong and snapping her shoulder. She sat up and groaned. 

“Hang on, love. I’ll get it back in.”

“Olivia…” she screamed when he put her shoulder back into joint. “Not Miss Queen or Liv. Just… Olivia.” 

“Bad memories attached to those titles, eh?” 

“Yeah, something like that.” She rested her back against the stone wall. She didn’t want to leave. She felt calm here. At peace. No monster on the inside that threatened to tip her over the edge and revel in carnage and agony. But she had to. She had a job to do if she wanted to be free of Waller and to atone for what she had done to the Yamashiro’s. 

Constantine stayed crouched in front of her, tender fingers prodding her shoulder. All she saw was the same man who she saw in Reiter’s tent. Shaggy blonde spikes, impossibly white shirt, red tie. The only difference in their eyes was the color; hers a frosty blue and his a deep wood brown but both held a hardness to them. A lack of shine that spoke of two people that had seen horror. Idly, she wondered where his scars were. Mostly on the outside, the inside, or a mix between the two like her? Unbidden, her gaze drooped to his lips. 

_They really were the same, weren’t they?_ She thought. 

“We truly are, love.” He chuckled. She wondered what it would be like to have someone understand her that much.

“It is absolutely freeing and damning at the same time.” She couldn’t even bring herself to care that her inner thoughts kept flying out of her mouth just then. A small smile curved her lips.

“Then I am damned.” She whispered and pulled him in for a kiss. Her shoulder wasn’t entirely happy with the movement but she didn’t care   
and neither did he. 

It wasn’t like kissing Slade, all tongue and teeth. It was gentle and sweet, not a single wasted movement. Rather than fighting, their tongues danced together. Now completely sane, she took her time with him and removing each other’s clothes until both were bare to the oddly warm air. He lightly kissed his way down her body, ravishing her breasts with practiced ease, until he got to her core. Blowing a hot breath across her folds, making her body arch towards him before taking her into his mouth. Her body came alive with hyperactivity. Feeling and hearing every move he made. She moaned and within minutes, her pleasure crested and he continued to tease her slick center until she was sobbing for him to stop. He crawled back up her body, hands gliding over her smooth flesh. 

He kissed her nice and sweet and slow, a silent question asking if he could continue. If she wanted this. Her hands found the silk of his hair and kissed him in answer. Slowly, oh so slowly, he rocked into her. He was close. Very close with no empty space between them. They groaned as he bottomed out inside her. Setting a tender pace that had both breathing hard and pleasure mounting. Fireworks dance behind her eyelids, the proverbial cord being pulled taunt until she felt that she would break. The world turned on its ear, behind their moans and breathy sighs was a drum beat. The air was warm and muggy, heavy with something she couldn’t name but somehow knew. Her body shook with climax, his pace quickening until he pushed himself deep inside and fell after her into that abyss. Their breathes mingled between them, his forehead on hers. She watched as he opened his eyes and gasped as they shifted colors to match hers before settling back to brown. 

“Don’t worry about it, love. Told you I can’t explain it.” He moved off of her to pull on his pants. She hissed at the ground digging into her palms, except, that wasn’t right. Her palms were face up.

“How about you try?” she said as she coughed. For no reason. His back was too her but she saw the wisps of smoke from his cigarette. 

“I told you. This place is as old as the world. Magic is rampant here.” She narrowed her eyes at him because, really, it wasn’t helpful. 

“The magic has a mind of its own. And it decided, for whatever reason, to bind us together.” She really hopped he hadn’t meant that as literally as she thought. She watched him as they dressed, seeing him wince or touch himself whenever she did something to her own body. They went back down the hallway and to the surface, nearing the stolen jeep. 

“Okay, I’ll say it. What’s with the giant rod?” 

“The Orb of Horus, a grimoire.” 

“Doesn’t look like a spell book.” She rolled her eyes when he quirked a brow at her. “Yeah. I read.” 

“I’ll keep it in a safe place. From men like Reiter.” Fourteen steps. It took fourteen steps from the opening to the tunnel for her demon to come back. It rushed to the surface with such force that her knees buckled and all she could see was red. She growled as her mind swirled with thoughts. The deaths and betrayals. _Fucking_ Waller. She seethed. Blood. She wanted blood. A maniac grin sliced her face as she bubbled over with laughter. Taianna was alone and everyone thought she was dead anyway. She would do nicely, no one would be any the wiser if she had some fun with the Russian. Warm hands gripped her cheeks and the red receded from her vision. The demon nestled and sleeping as if already satiated. John stood in front of her, eyes full of worry though his face remained impassive. 

“Come back with me, Olivia. This place is poison. I have a boat, we can leave and never come back.” She laced their fingers together. She wanted to go with him. To leave this place and all it brought her behind but she couldn’t. Those people needed her. Waller would have her head if she ducked out of the mission. 

“Aren’t you the hero?” he chuckled and kissed her. 

“Can’t come back empty handed. Conklin is up my ass enough as it is.” John turned the rod in his hand and brought it down on the bumper of the jeep. The giant ruby ball flying off and rolling across the ground. 

“Goons do love the sparkly bits.” She laughed as she picked it up. 

“It’s useless anyway. The real power is in the spell.” He held the point of the rod over a tattoo on his arm while chanting a strange language. As he drug the point across his skin the ink vanished as if it evaporated. “Lift your shirt, love.” 

“Ready to go again already?” but she did so anyway. He held his hand an inch from her skin and chanted again. When he stopped and pulled away she looked down to see the tattoo he had now in her skin. 

“I liked the sex but I don’t do branding.” She scowled. 

“A bit of insurance against Reiter. When the time comes, you’ll know how to use it.” 

“Now it’s time for me to go.” she caught his wrist.

“And this magic bond?”

“It will lessen over time but not go away completely.” He held her face and kissed her deeply. 

“I… I need you to punch me in the face.” 

“Sorry, love.” He whispered before her socked her under her right eye. 

It honestly wasn’t that hard to convince Reiter that she had been a good soldier and fought to recapture John and had been knocked out in the process. Only after she had allowed him to lead her to what he was after, of course. Conklin’s opinion of her hadn’t changed but that didn’t matter to her. He was one man in a small army and no one questioned her, not even Reiter. She led them both through the tunnels to the chamber that the orb had been in. She stopped Reiter from crossing the threshold, because even she was not that good of an actress and a dead Reiter would make Conklin in charge and her life hell. He passed the orb over the wood of the doorway, showing a blue glow in the form of odd symbols. 

“A heart of water… have you seen a cove on this island?” Reiter asked her. 

“Yeah, I know where it is.”

“Good take a dozen workers and go excavate. Work them until you find my gift.” She nodded. Conklin took Reiter to the side and spoke in hushed words. No doubt trying to sell him on the idea that she was a rat. But that didn’t matter. One person thinking she was a rat was easy to handle.

The very next day, she, Conklin, and a dozen workers walked to the cove that she knew to be the only one on the island. She brought food for the workers and fresh water to keep them going. Conklin rode her ass hard every time he was within talking distance. There was one worker, Vlad, which she actually liked. He pushed back against her for the good of others and she respected that. As she ate her mind wandered to how many days they had been at this cove. Wandering farther until John entered her mind. She felt at peace then, a balance she didn’t know she had. Instinctively, she knew he was okay. If she tried, really tried, she could see what he was doing right then. He knew it too. She caught him smirking to himself often. 

She left him and brought her mind back to the cove, keeping an eye on Conklin because he was no doubt planning something to undermine her. From her spot on the rocks, she saw Conklin the Ass approach Vlad. This would be difficult. Conklin kept their conversation quiet so that if his scheme backfired no one would be able to prove or know that he had been the one to start it. If she had any sort of emotion in her, she would feel terrible for what was to come. It was sad; she had really liked Vlad and had hoped to get him to Taianna. 

_How unfortunate._ That was heartfelt and the most she could allow herself to feel. 

It hadn’t taken long for whatever stunt Conklin wanted was pulled. Vlad had tackled her to the ground as she was returning to the beach from visiting Taianna who hadn’t had any information about Reiter’s true motives. Vlad was much stronger than she had anticipated, fueled by anger. He rebounded from the impact faster and tossed her into the water. Not only was he stronger than he should be but also faster. He was on her back before she could recover and forcing her head beneath the surface. She had already seen it coming but she hadn’t expected him to make his move only hours after Conklin put the idea into his head. 

She couldn’t help but grin. This was too easy. She let herself scream underwater and flail her arms and legs. The more it looked like a life or death situation the more in the clear she was with Reiter. She didn’t let herself feel guilt for what she was about to do to Vlad. Why should she? He was gullible enough to believe whatever lie Conklin told him and attacked her. Her beast roared in her head. After so long without a fresh kill the demon was beginning to get agitated. Like a switch being flipped, the cage door that held her darkness at bay vanished like smoke. Distantly, in her mind she could hear John screaming like he was in pain. But that didn’t matter right then. She was _hungry_ and there was a nice juicy one right next to her. She planted her feet as best she could in the slimy sand and bucked. Tossing him back and breaking free to grab a quick breath before she dove at him. Catching his punch and pulling him close. One arm around his neck and the other locked around his back to keep him in place. A high, keening laugh escaped her chest as he flailed. 

“You stupid fool.” She laughed before she snapped his neck like a twig. She let him drop into the water, letting all the workers see her. Conklin didn’t miss a beat as he began to shout at her from the throng of workers. She laughed even harder, grabbing her stomach and doubling over. 

“Oh, I have a wonderful story!” 

Conklin walked back to the camp with her, flapping his gums about how Reiter wasn’t going to like this situation. That Vlad was a good worker and that the others listened to him but all it did was make her laugh that much harder. The demon within was still out and about. Roaming her mind like a predator on the hunt for the next victim. Conklin would make for a good one but perhaps it would be best to save him for last. The anticipation would make the act that much more satisfying. 

“Maybe he didn’t have a choice. Eh, Conklin?” she giggled. 

“What are you on about?”

“Come now. You didn’t really think I didn’t notice? So what did you tell him? That I killed his sister?” He turned to face her with a confused look. “Honestly, Conklin. Do you think that just because I have a pussy that I don’t pay attention to my surroundings? Looks aside, I do listen when people talk.” She sighed as the beast finally came to heel. 

Reiter was as emotionless as ever, his eye twitching ever so slightly as she and Conklin told him what happened. He told his side and she told hers, it was no secret that Conklin had no trust for her. It was also no secret that Conklin shouted orders and never spoke quietly to the workers. Reiter listened to them bicker back and forth for a minute or two then stood in front of her with a bundle of sticks in his hands. He asked why she killed the prisoner and she responded with the same answer as before, that he had attacked her. He stood in front of Conklin and asked if he put the prisoner up to it, upon his answer the sticks crackled. Conklin was promptly dragged, kicking and screaming from the tent. 

“If I must pay for the loss of a worker, I will.” She looked at her current leader. Reiter shook his head and grabbed the whip from the wall before exiting. She looked at his desk and found a piece of paper, she snagged it on her way out. 

In the middle of the central area, Conklin sat on his knees with his hands bound and his shirt off. Reiter handed her the whip, the instructions clear as day. Conklin would be punished by the one he sought to hurt. She moved to stand a few paces behind him and he began to beg. Which pissed her off more. He should try going through what she had to, see when the time to beg was. She let the whip uncoil and struck when she noticed his muscles relax. It would have hurt less if he was tense and she wanted her pound of flesh from the man. He screamed when the barb bit into his skin and she smiled. Each time Reiter demanded she do it harder, she did it twice as hard. Just to watch him squirm. Yet again, the darkness creeped into her and she could hear John talking to her in her mind. Trying to calm the fury she lived with. 

But she kept going, the demon inside sung in her head. As the beast got louder, so did he until their yelling was all that she could hear. Then she felt it. His arms winding around her and enveloping her in his warmth. Her world dimmed then sharpened into focus with a snap. Her arm burned and her chest heaved. The whole day John stayed with her. Coiled so tightly around her being to keep her darkness under control until she could do it on her own. 

That night, she visited Taianna who was cooking up two lizards. She had gotten much better at removing the skin. No idea why she kept trying to take it off, that species wasn’t poisonous. She had offered but Olivia wasn’t hungry. Far from it actually. She had eaten at John’s demand but she hadn’t tasted any of it. It was dark, the firelight casting shadows everywhere. Just like the evil within herself. 

“I have to tell you something about your brother.” Taianna’s gaze snapped toward her but she refused to look at the other woman.

“Vlad? Is he okay?” She shook her head.

“I’m sorry Taianna.”

“Is he-?”

“I… am so… sorry…” She left then. What could she possibly say to the hysterical woman whose world she just demolished? She kept her breathes silent as she stayed outside of the cave. Listening to the heart-breaking sobs and the bitter words against the decisions that landed her and her brother here. She was a dive instructor and he a deckhand. Like the deckhand Olivia’s own father had shot to better her own chances at survival. She had pinned the whole thing on Conklin, though Vlad had been killed by her hands, Conklin had set him on the path to his demise. 

She came back a few nights later, hoping Taianna would be in a better mood. After all, Lian Yu was not a place to dwell on that which made you weak. She wanted to kill Conklin, understandable but not the solution. Conklin, for all the trouble he caused, was not the main problem. Reiter was. He was after something, but without a detailed survey of the whole island she couldn’t follow the old map she had. She had a plan but for that she needed Taianna. She needed the vengeful woman to become her pawn as Conklin was Reiter’s.


	23. Episode 23: A Monster I Will Be

Getting Taianna to agree to being her pawn was easy. Her gullibility made her beast purr in satisfaction and laugh in amusement. In the corner of her mind and soul, she felt John try to breach the wall she surrounded herself with. She couldn’t afford to have him cloud her judgement. He knew this but kept trying anyway. It took all night and most of the morning to get to where they needed to be with only two more miles to go. Taianna huffed and sat down on a rock, complaining about the distance. The beast growled, upset with the woman who seemed to want to give up on her quest for vengeance before it even began. So she prodded, got her blood boiling.

“Your version of revenge is more indirect than mine.” 

“You’re right. I am using you.” Bingo. Now she had the Russian’s attention. “I need your diving skills.” 

“You…”

“What would Vlad want you to do?” Olivia and her demon watched in sick glee as resolve spread across the Russian’s face like water on a floor. 

She brought the woman to the far beach where the remnants of the Amazo lay I her watery grave. Reiter didn’t have a detail survey of the island but he isn’t Purgatory’s first or only visitor. Taianna gave her about an hour of instruction on how to free dive and, basically, not die. She stripped as much as she needed to, wading along into the water only in her shirt and underwear.   
Getting to the boat was harder than she originally thought. Her lungs burned with need for oxygen. Her demon growled at her weakness. John stayed close to her soul, pointing out air pockets for her to use so she could get closer. When she reached the interior, or what was left of the interior, of the Amazo she surfaced through and air pocket. Her lungs drew in deep and ragged breathes to cease the buzzing of oxygen deprivation in her head. Finding Ivo’s old command center was difficult. The torpedo’s the Anatoli had slammed into the hull had bent everything out of shape until most of it was an unrecognizable hunk of metal. She dived down to a chest she had seen Ivo play with during her interrogation. Inside, thank God, was the survey she needed. Leaving the ship the same way she came in, swimming at an easy pace until John set off alarm bells in her head.

 _Behind you, Love!_ He shouted. She turned to see a very large fish with very large teeth coming after her. She dove at the water, propelling herself through the water but the shark was too fast. Her beast roared in fury as she screamed and lost her air supply as the shark sunk its teeth into her side. She punched the shark in the nose until it let go and she grabbed the dorsal fin so it brought her closer to the shore line. Once she was within easy reach, she drew the knife from her boot, losing more air as she groaned at the pain in her side, and drove the blade into the sharks head. Surfacing, Taianna rushed to her side and helped her to the sand. 

“Well, hey Taianna. You are a lot less dead than we thought.” Said a gruff voice full of bitter triumph. 

_Fucking Conklin._ She thought. 

“You may not be a spy but you’re definitely a liar, bitch.” Conklin stood with three more men behind him. Taianna had no weapon and the wound in her side would prevent her from doing anything other than dying and bleeding on their boots. She shivered, from her body going into shock and from the cold. Her demon pushed John to the wayside and came to the surface. He allowed it because he knew that her demon was her best chance at survival. 

“You’re probably lying about being a spy. I am going to enjoy taking pieces out of you.” He said. She laughed at him, that hysterical kind that only insane people had. She tore off her shirt, the pain in her side not registering anymore, and threw it at him. Exposing the scars from the numerous wounds she had received in the last two years. 

“Promises. Promises, Conklin. What could you do to me?” Hindsight being 20/20, she probably shouldn’t have goaded him. He hauled her to her feet and made her march through the forest in nothing but her underwear. He talked the whole way and she just laughed at him. How could she not? What could Conklin or Reiter possibly to do her that hadn’t already been done? John rushed to the surface, pushing her demon away. She groaned as the pain hit her and she fell to the ground. 

_Asshole._

_You’re pushing him too far, Love._ He may have a point but he did not have to be an ass about it. Taianna helped her to stand and supported most of her weight as they continued. Conklin in their ears the whole way about getting attached. She wanted to laugh. No doubt Conklin would tell Taianna that she had killed her brother. Conklin brought them in front of Reiter who merely looked on with detachment. Conklin called her a liar, Taianna being the perfect proof. 

“What you all do outside of camp to fulfill your needs is of no interest to me.” 

“That’s why I brought these. If she’s been on this island as long as she said then how did she know about the freighter and the map?” Conklin said as he placed the bundle on the table. 

“I got th-those for you. For… whatever it is you’re after…” she hissed in pain. Reiter got in her face.

“Yet you waited. With someone you had claimed to kill. I defended you Miss Queen, at the cost of my credibility with my men. You can kill her now if you’d like.”

“Naw, I got something else in mind.” Conklin said with a grin. They bound her hands and shoved her to her knees outside. She started cackling, John and the beast switching places in her mind. 

“Bring it on, baby. Show me what you got!” she laughed. Her laugher becoming louder and louder with each hit. She did feel the pain, contrary to what one might think. But what was the point of screaming? It was a dull ache compared to everything else she had gone through. Yes, it hurt but pain was good. Pain is your friend and ally. Pain tells your body that it has been seriously injured. But the best thing about pain is that it tells you that you’re not dead yet. 

“Stop!” A voice called. She knew the tone to be male but who was it? She didn’t know. Couldn’t remember. 

_Your name is Olivia Queen._

“My name is Olivia Queen.” She whispered to the voice in her head. She knew that voice too. People spoke around her but she couldn’t track any of it. She just paid attention to that voice in her head. That calm and soothing voice she knew.

_That’s it, Love. Come back to me._

_You can’t escape this time, Livvy. Fight or die._ This was a new voice. One she also knew and one that sent her mind into overdrive. She had started drumming her fingers again. Trying to run away from it all. She grabbed Conklin’s gun and pointed it at him. The rest of the men trained theirs on her. She staggered. 

“What can you do?” Conklin asked. 

“I am not running.” She hissed before she put the barrel beneath her own chin. “I will help you find what you need. On one condition. So long as Taianna is alive you have my cooperation.” 

“She’s manipulating you.” Conklin growled at Reiter. 

“We have a deal?” she asked as she tightened her finger on the trigger. Reiter nodded his head in the barest movement and she handed it over to him. He barked for the men to take both her and Taianna to prison. They put her and Taianna in the same cell, she was too weak. She collapsed on the floor with a soft whimper. The other woman spoke softly to her as she attempted to gently clean the whip marks on her back. 

They gave her a few days to heal and thankfully she managed to avoid an infection. Once she was nearly healed, Reiter had his men grab her and chain her up in the center of the room. Taianna was zip-tied to the bars of their cell. Reiter took a live wire and put a sponge on it, wet the sponge and jabbed it against her skin. She screamed. Nothing hurt more than electroshock torture. He shouted at her, wanting to know why she wanted the maps and something about her tattoos. He kept at it for a long while, Taianna was removed and she was quickly reaching the point of passing out. Suddenly, the soft whiz and thunk of an arrow hitting the mark sounded and Reiter dropped to his knees. She looked around and saw a woman on the second floor with Yao Fei’s green hood and his bow. 

_How dare that bitch touch those things! She has no right!_ She seethed. The woman dropped the hood and there stood Shado.

“Nice to see you again, Olivia.” Her world went black. Or rather, she would have liked to pass out but she didn’t. Reiter dissolved in front of her like dust in the wind and Shado set her free from her chains. 

“Mei?” 

“Shado.” 

“Shado is dead.” She hissed, shaking her head.

“Yes. You’re having a vision as a result of your injuries.” So this isn’t real. Perfect. Not like her mind wasn’t already off the rails. 

“No, but what I have come to tell you is.” Wonderful. Her psychotic break was being cryptic. “You have to forgive yourself for what you’ve done.”

“Want to be more specific?” 

“You had the chance to leave the island and return to your family. They miss you terribly.” She winced.

“I can’t go back… I’m a monster Shado…”

“Then change. The only way out is through, Olivia.” Waller had said the same but what did it mean?

“Your darkness. You have to let it go.” 

“I can’t. Don’t you see? I _can’t_! I don’t know how!” 

“I will teach you.” She sat on the floor with Shado, her eyes closed to the world around her. She listened to Shado’s voice. Committing it to memory once again. The darkness inside her was her guilt over having killed so many. It infected her like a virus that she allowed to move through her system. She opened her eyes at Shado’s command and found a rock with strange symbols on it but Shado was gone. And she was left all alone again. She woke up again on the bed in her cell with Taianna standing vigil at her side. A flurry of words left her mouth. Something about a fever and getting her water. Her hand shot out and grabbed the blurry sight of the arm. She hefted herself up into sitting position. 

Time to erase the guilt. She thought.

Some of it, Love. Ah… John was back.

She spoke in small sentences, her throat dry and horse from days of not being used. The darkness inside of herself, she embraced it willingly. Allowed it to poison her entire being because she thought she needed it. She did need it, but the amount within her was becoming unmanageable. She had to erase some of it or John would no longer be able to bring her back from the edge. It hurt to see Taianna cry. More so than she had expected it too. John spoke to her in soft tones, trying to soothe her pain and she gave into the feeling of his ghostly arms around her. 

Open your hand, Love. She did and the rock from her fever dream was still there. 

Taianna continued to cry until her anger took over as it was bound to do. She turned on Olivia with venom in her voice. Asking why she had saved her but killed her brother. The beast and her had two different answers. To the demon, Taianna would make a good pawn given the right incentive. Vlad, not so much. To a clear headed Olivia, the answer was murky and hard to define. Vlad held her head underwater so she couldn’t tell him that his sister was alive. Even if she had told him, he would not believe her without proof. And proof she didn’t have. 

Simply speaking…

“He attacked me.” 

“Vlad would not do such a thing!” she hissed. She shot up from the bed and stalked close to Taianna, boxing her in against the cell bars. What did she know, anyway? A man in mourning and pointed to the killer of his sister. A man will do all sorts of things not normally thought of. Sure, she had proof that Conklin was wrong and that she hadn’t killed his sister, but what did that matter when there was no proof readily available and no time to bargain for said time? By the look on Taianna’s face, Olivia had spoken every word out loud. A mix of shame and despair. The demon purred. It was such a good look on her. 

“This island is Hell, Taianna. Killing a man is the least of anyone’s worries.” She hissed and moved back to the bed. The sickness continued to coil through her veins, forgiveness wasn’t working. Taianna would never forgive her for this; evident by the way she snatched the rock and called for a guard. No matter, that was just the reaction Olivia had wanted. But why wasn’t the beast becoming easier to manage? Shado had said that if she forgave herself for the evil she had done the beast would vanish. 

Not that simple, Love. 

She was going to ask John what he had meant but her connection with him went to the back burner when Reiter appeared and shouted. Voice echoing off the stone until it turned to a roar that was devoid of any emotion. Taianna showed him the rock and a semblance of emotion crossed his eyes. He took the stone from her and she cried. Begged to be away from Olivia like she was the root of all evil and it sickened her to be near. Or like she had killed her brother and hid it from her for a few weeks. Reiter then reacted as she had thought. Taianna was to stay with her until she was physically better and if Olivia died, Taianna would join her. 

Days later, Taianna was still feeding her water and aspirin. Olivia wasn’t fooled; Taianna only cared about her own life. A life that would be cut short if Olivia didn’t make a speedy recovery. Taianna’s bitterness bothered her. Sure, she deserved every ounce of it but the way her mourning was eating her alive was bothersome. It made Olivia feel and she didn’t need nor want to feel right now when she was too weak to run away from it all. 

“When my father’s boat went down… it was him, me, and a crewman… after a few days we were running out of food and water...” Taianna turned away with a hiss. Something about a small heart and not understanding. “He pulled out a gun and shot the crewman… then himself not three feet away… Since then I have lost four more people that I loved.”

“I saw it in your eyes when we first met.”

“That I was good? Evil?” she chuckled. Or tried to before it turned into a coughing fit.

“That you were lost. Shattered. There is an old Russian saying… _Tot zhe molot chto drobit steklo, kuyet stal_. The same hammer that shatters glass, forges steel.” 

“So I’m glass?”

“For now. You want to be the person your father wanted you to be, then you start here. Save us from Reiter. Become steel.” 

A few days later and her fever was gone and she no longer hacked up a lung when she spoke too much. Reiter called her and she shivered in revulsion at the name he used. Miss Queen. How she hated that name. He told her to rest because they began digging at day break. They began digging that morning, a few of the people taking pot shots at her. It didn’t matter. They were hateful words born out of desperation to make someone else to be the villain they could face. She was prepared for the attack long before Reiter’s men left the room. The round man with shaggy blonde hair struck first. She allowed the hit, catching his meaty paw in her kidney. She planted her feet and ground her teeth. Taking the hand on her shoulder and using it to pitch him forward right into her oncoming elbow. The man went down like a two ton sack of potatoes. His fingers grasping her shirt as he went to the floor. The flimsy material gave way until her torso was bared to the onlookers. Even the fat man with the now broken nose gasped at the sight of her marred flesh. She growled. There was so much more to the story if they would have just asked about it. It set her temper flaring. 

“I killed Vlad. You happy?! I killed him! You know why?” she snarled at the group. She grabbed the man on the floor and hauled him up by his hair. “Conklin told him where to find the one who killed his sister. Yet there she is! Hale and whole. Would you have believed me?” a man hit her across the back with a shovel, breaking it across her skin. She dropped the man she held and whirled around, taking his head in her hands and forcing his midsection into her rising knee.

“I have been on this island for the better part of three years. This! This is what it turned me into! Do you see? Do you fucking see it?!” she screeched as she tossed the man aside. “It turned me into a monster! Want me to prove it to you?” she was heaving for breath. Her rage boiling until she was sure her skin was bubbling over. 

“Prove it then. Show us you’re on our side. Kill Conklin.” The fat man said as he held his bleeding nose. She snorted at him. 

“If you think it takes a monster to fight monsters… then a monster I will be.”


	24. Episode 24: Down the Rabbit Hole

After Taianna got the splinters from the shovel out of her back, Olivia was given a new shirt and brought before Reiter in handcuffs. She asked if they were necessary even though she knew the answer. The monster was still singing in her veins and John was curiously silent. Reiter attempted to convince her that everything happened was due to destiny. She knew where to find the survey, regardless of Conklin taking them from her; they never would have found it if not for her. Same with the rock that Taianna had given them. Conklin came and told Reiter that he was needed and she was left alone with her target. Popping her thumb out of place would make too much noise, so she turned and took a nail file and picked the lock of the cuffs soundlessly. Conklin didn’t notice until her hands were free and she lunged at him. He ducked around her just as she thought he would and grabbed the straight razor from the sink. Holding the way Slade had showed her. 

“Just for kicks, I’m gonna gut them all.” 

“You won’t touch them ever again.” she snarled.

“There she is… there’s the killer.” 

He swung high, aiming for her face and she ducked low. She stabbed at him from the right; he ducked so she twisted to catch him from the left. He swung high and twisted under the blow. He brought the blade down and she blocked with her open hand. It was the same tempo Slade trained her in; strike, block, counter. She tried the same but he caught her arm and tried to twist the knife from her grip. She got free and went high; he backed up and fell to one knee. Perfect. Now she had the better vantage point so long as he stayed there. She grabbed him and smashed his face into the mirror. Taking him about the throat and his knife hand she forced him to the wall. Forcing his own blade into his heart. 

“Stupid cunt… Reiter’s gonna kill them no matter what you do…” he laughed. She growled and pulled the blade free, watching as he fell to the side and chocked on his own blood. She felt wetness on her pant leg. Damn Conklin nicked her inner thigh. But that wasn’t a pressing matter at the moment. Right now, she had to work on pulling her monster back into it’s cage. She didn’t have the relationship with Taianna to rely on her to help. She had to do this under her own power. And it didn’t work.

They put her in a cell by herself because there was clearly something very wrong with her. Her eyes were open and reacted to light but nothing else. It was like she was physically there, but her mind and soul were buried deep within. Trying, desperately trying to get the darkness to recede from her mind. She sat there and thought about it. Let herself feel it, for once. It was a strange kind of pressure. The darkness. She was aware of it, like breathing or talking. It was an automatic kind of thing, didn’t have to think about it at all. 

_Keep going, Love. Forgive yourself._

John was like that too. An automatic thing that was always with her, like her own heartbeat. But she didn’t understand why she had no control over herself. The guilt that gave birth to the monster inside her was the same thing that kept it chained.

“Honestly, Love. What am I to do with you?” she blinked and jumped when she noticed John bent over in front of her. Tumbling off the cot she sat on, which was weird because there should be a wall behind her but there wasn’t. In fact, there wasn’t anything around. No prison cell or Reiter. Just mist and light and John. She got to her feet and looked around then sighed.

“Another fever dream?” 

“Not entirely, Love.” He chuckled. 

“Is cryptic your first language? Cause your English sucks.” She rolled her eyes at him. 

“There are many planes of existence, Love. With spaces in between.” 

“So, we’re in between. Why didn’t you just say that?” 

“I like to think of myself as a teacher.” She laughed with him. She looked around the desolate place void of, well, anything really. It didn’t add up to her. John said that the lack of contact would weaken the bond so how were they here?

“Because we never stopped.” Ah, that sort of made sense. Ever since he left he had been a constant presence in her mind. They talked often. Mostly, it was him talking her down off of the ledge she always found her-self tap dancing on. 

“You did this. Why?” she sure as hell didn’t.  
“You’re slipping, Olivia. You won’t forgive yourself so you are slowly becoming the thing you hate. That whole catatonic thing you’ve been pulling is your mind and souls way of trying to keep you balanced.” 

“The fuck do you know?!”

“I know everything!” he hissed. His eyes were wild with anger and pain. How could he possibly… the bond? They had enough of a connection that they could communicate telepathically but did that bleed over into him having access to her memories? The thought of him knowing what she did, of what was done to her, made her pale and sick. She ducked her head as she started to feel queasy. Barely noticing his hands around her biceps. 

“None of that was your fault, Olivia. You can’t blame yourself for it.” She started itching as she sank to her knees. The thought of those things made her skin crawl. 

“If I h-hadn’t gone back…-”

“You were pure then. Innocent to the evil that men can do.” 

_I am so dirty…_ she knew that she was but did her best to deny and forget it.

“Never!” he growled and shook her shoulders. But it was too late. The dam had broken. Faces and voices and feelings raced across her vision. He remembered it all. The rancid stench of their breaths. Breaking her jaw so she couldn’t close her mouth. That horrible pain between her thighs. 

“No one should ever have to go through that, Love. Not anyone. Especially not for their first time.” John enfolded her into his arms. Letting the tears that threatened to spill finally fall without anyone noticing. Like a movie on fast forward, she couldn’t catch up to the feelings washing over her. One moment she was back in the past, feeling her rape all over again, then she was catapulted weeks ahead. Her screams as Yao Fei died from a bullet ripping his flesh. Losing Shado the same way. Killing Slade instead of giving him the cure. 

“My baby…” she sobbed. 

“Is on Slade not you.” They stayed that way for an eternity. Until her tears were spent and she drifted off to sleep. Weakly, she noticed a red string between her and John. And another that went off into the darkness. 

She woke up in a cell but different than the one than where she started. Taianna was with her, standing at the door to their cell and talking to Reiter. He was saying something about getting his prize and wanting them with him when he did. She hauled herself up as they opened the door. She felt lighter than before. Like a weight had been lifted. She touched her chest, where the red string she saw was and felt it hum. John was still with her. She pushed the thought of the other string from her mind as she followed Taianna and Reiter to the hole in the wall they made. 

He prattled on about feeling energy there and the electricity in the power lines sang in time with the flickering of the lights. They shied away when the fuzebox blew and there, standing in front of the hole was Conklin. White eyed and speaking a language she shouldn’t have known but something in her knew what he was saying in that odd, gravelly voice. One of the soldiers to the side opened fire but they didn’t even faze him, or it. The thing that was using Conklin’s body advanced as they tried to leave. Reiter pulled a gun and forced them to stay in the room with the god knew what. She moved Taianna behind her, not that she could do much against a supernatural entity other than be extremely polite and hope it didn’t murder her. It looked at her and cocked its head as her side started to burn. The side with the tattoo that John said would help her. The thing said she was worthy before fading into smoke. 

“We have only gotten this far because of you, Miss Queen. Shall we finish this now?” Reiter said as he entered the room not that the ghost was gone. She snarled a version of you-son-of-a-bitch back at him. She took the outstretched flashlight and moved toward the hole in the wall. Pushing her surroundings away from her so that she could focus. 

_John…_

_I’m here, love._

_I don’t know what I am doing._

_I’m here, love. I’ll guide you._ She breathed a sigh of relief at his words. 

Inside the hole was large and cavernous, very similar to the mine shaft that the tunnel her and John walked through. Really, the only difference between the two was that this one was so much darker. Even when the torches that dotted the walls were lit, it never seemed to get any brighter. She kept walking. Fuck Reiter and his goons. Fuck Taianna and her whining. She needed to focus. 

_Go left, love._ She went left. 

_Down that corridor. You’re almost there, love._ She kept following his voice, aware of little else, until she came to a small chamber. Sunlight, or what appeared to be sunlight shone through cracks near the ceiling. Two columns at the top of short steps with a small statue on a pedestal between them. Reiter approached the statue and told his sad tale of woe. How his village was razed to the ground after bandits took what they wanted. How helpless he felt. His words struck a chord with her but she buried it. 

_Don’t let him near it, Olivia!_

“How does their deaths make you any different?” She hissed at him. He drew a gun and walked toward them.

“Let me show you.” He said before shooting one of the slaves. She watched as the man fell to the floor and winced as Taianna screamed. Reiter approached as she goaded him, calling him insane. As the man took his last breath, a white mist lifted from his body and floated over to the statue. The details glowing white as it absorbed what came out of the now dead man. 

“The power of a single life.” He said as he rolled up his sleeve.

“Everyone is in position.” Said the goon.

“Tell them to shoot.” She lunged at the goon first, socking him in the jaw before slamming Reiter into the pedestal and throw him to the ground. Taianna grabbed the statue and they ran, ducking for cover from fire from Reiter or his goons. The ran for some distance, stopping when she was fairly sure Reiter wouldn’t follow them. Taianna tried to smash the statue but it didn’t even make a dent. 

_Magic, love, can’t be destroyed. Only changed._

_Then what do I do?_ Reiter’s voice through the radio snapped her back to reality. Only way out was back the way they came. So the fuck what if he had the numbers? So the fuck what if he had the weapons? She had tricks up her sleeve too. All it would take is letting go. Let the demon inside break free to run rampant. 

_Sure about that, love?_

_I am. I have faith you can bring me back again._

“Taianna, listen closely. Here’s what we are going to do.” 

They left the statue where it was on the ground. Taianna moved further into the tunnels until she was out of sight as Olivia scrambled her way up the wall to hid in the rafters. The familiar burn in her muscles sped the process of releasing her inner monster along. As the last chain popped free, she felt a wicked grin slice her face open. John’s voice faded away as her beast purred at the prospect of bloodshed. She could be patient and wait for her prey. After all, the best hunters were the smartest ones. 

She didn’t have to wait long as two goons stopped directly underneath her. Putting their guns away as one picked up the statue. She fell from her perch to bring them both down. Landing on her feet she struck on hard in the ribs and the back. Punching him to daze him long enough to grab his own gun and sock him with it. The other one drew his weapon and pointed it at her. She laughed. Why did they all think she was afraid of those silly things? Just like Slade had taught her, she had him groaning on the ground and disarmed within seconds. If that little trinket fed on death than she would be sure to starve it. 

She picked up the guns with a manic giggle and put them behind her back. Humming a happy tune, she skipped along the hallways and corridors until she was just outside the chamber they found that thing. She called out the mercenary in the same sing-songy way she did with Fyers. She spat as she thought about him. Even his name left a bad taste in her mouth. He turned and pinned her with an icy stare that she found very annoying. He should be cowering in his boots before her. She growled as she drew the gun and shot him. 

_Now that was unexpected._ She frowned.

“See now the value of my prize, Miss Queen?” 

“Oh yeah. My own personal punching bag that screams like I want it. Happy birthday to me!” 

“I command the primordial energies that flow through all things.” He chuckled. He held his hand out and felt a strange sort of pressure but otherwise she remained upright. Even cocked her hip under her own power and smirked at him. The confusion and instant of fear in his eyes was enough to turn her on big time.

“Don’t worry, pumpkin. Lots of guys your age have performance issues.” She laughed as she lunged.  
She swiped at him the with but of the gun she stole but he caught her arm and flipped her over. She rolled and crouched down. Prepared for the boot to her chest, she took it full force as well as the searing pain in her back as it hit the pedestal. Pain was good. Pain was her best motherfucking friend and it only made her stronger. She caught his punch and forced them both to the ground, she recovered first. Bringing her knee to connect with his solar plexus, then kicking his temple. She lunged at him again, straddling his chest as she let blow after blow rain down on his face like spring rain, letting out a gasping laugh with each hit. 

“Think you could be some kind of god?” she laughed. “What happens when those lives run out?” 

His eyes changed to a serpentine yellow and it grew until there was no normal part of the eye that was visible. He picked her up by her throat and stood, lifting until she was a foot or two off the ground. But that strength of his didn’t last; as soon as the yellow glow appeared it was gone and he dropped her. A smile curved her lips. Much like the Cheshire cat she was currently crouched like. She reached forward and pulled the hidden blade from Reiter’s boot and surged upward with a war cry that shook the rafters. Sinking it deep into his jugular vein. The blood splashed onto her and clung to her skin. 

“Should we leave it here?” She went back to Taianna and helped her to stand, the idol heavy in her hands.

“Bring it. Leave it. I don’t really care.”

“But Reiter’s men…?”

“I told you, didn’t I? If you think it takes a monster to fight monsters, then a monster I will be.” With that, Olivia Queen, the demoness of Lian Yu island stalked her way out of the catacombs. The bloodbath to come made her smile.


End file.
